


My Favorite Color Is You

by Surprised_by_witches



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Action, Alternate Universe - 1990s, Alternate Universe - Earth, Alternate Universe - Human/Troll Society (Homestuck), Crimes & Criminals, Deviates From Canon, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Found Family, Humor, Interspecies Relationship(s), M/M, Multi, Non-Linear Narrative, Period-Typical Homophobia, Pickpockets, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations, Romance, runaways - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2018-11-18
Packaged: 2019-08-17 09:14:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 16
Words: 67,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16513514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Surprised_by_witches/pseuds/Surprised_by_witches
Summary: “So, do you think it exists?” he asked finally.“Think what exists?”“A town in the bayou where no one gives a fuck what you do or where you came from. But where they, you know, don’t want to kill you either. Live and let live kind of place. With hot guys and something to do once in a while.”





	1. What Happened in Vegas

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place in two different years: 1989 and 1993. Primary characters are human teen gay runaways (17+ in 1989) in the United States, in a universe where trolls tried and failed to take over the Earth, leaving behind stray soldiers who are now the lowest caste of society. Primarily a romance, lots of adventure, mild violence, humor, some depictions of homophobia, some brief, frankly described sex, a fuckton of swearing, some nonviolent crime. Cell phones are more advanced due to troll tech but there's no Internet yet.
> 
> This is an au in three ways: it's a Homestuck-inspired version of Earth that non-Homestucks should be able to follow pretty easily. It's also an au of another story I've been writing for over a decade, about two characters who I wanted to explore in a different setting, and it's an alternate future for the characters in Mynah's Creek, a story that's currently in the works. All that aside, it's a standalone story about growing up and falling in love and what that means for a couple of runaway boys.
> 
> I vacillated on the underage tag: the two main characters are one year apart in age, 17 and 18 in 1989, 21 and 22 in 1993. No age of consent laws are broken. Any other sexual relationships are between people 18 and older. Everything is consensual.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If that’s how you sleep you are definitely getting the floor.”

Chapter One

June 12, 1989  
Las Vegas

Avery took the hotel stairs three at a time, his heart pounding in his ears. Behind him he could hear his pursuers, grunting with the effort of keeping up. He opened the door ahead of him and bolted down the corridor, hoping to find a place to hide, his feet flying on the tackily carpeted floor. No luck, but there was another stairwell. Behind him he heard “Hey!” as he leapt up the stairs, panting now, sweaty from running, his feet barely touching the risers as he burst into yet another corridor.

Ahead of him someone was opening the door to their room. He had an impression of thin, long blonde hair, nice clothes as he grabbed their arm and pulled them into the room, shutting it quickly behind them.

The young man whirled on him. He was slightly taller than Avery, with a handsome elvish look about him and right now he looked pissed. 

“You had better have a fucking--”

Avery clamped his hand over his mouth and held up a finger. Outside he could hear the men running past.”How the fuck did that little shit run so fast?”

“I dunno, but we’d better” -- pant -- “catch him or it’s our necks.”

The voices and footsteps receded. Avery let out a long breath and took his hand back.

The other boy raised an eyebrow at him. “What the fuck did you just drag me into?” His voice was an angry whisper with a strong Southern accent behind it.

Avery, panting still from the running, said, “Could I have a drink of water?”

Tall blonde and handsome stared at him blankly, then rolled his eyes. “Help yourself.” He went and flopped down in a chair and took off one nice brown dress shoe. His shoes went well with his off-white linen suit and brown shirt. He massaged his foot as Avery, gratefully, went and got a glass of water from the bathroom before sitting down in the other chair. 

“I’m Avery.”

This earned him another look. “We friends now?”

“You saved my life, so, uh, I’m thinking yeah.”

This earned him an exasperated chuckle. “You don’t give up easy.”

Avery finished his water, tipping his head back to get every drop. He set the glass down on the arm of the chair. “Nope.”

The other boy looked at him for another long moment, then sighed. “Seth.”

Avery grinned at him. “Nice to meet you.”

“So, what did you do?”

Avery opened up his jacket to show Seth the wad of money hidden there.

Seth sighed. “You know they’re going to be watching for you. The only ways you’re leaving this casino is through that window or feet first.”

“I won this.”

“Sure you did.”

“I’ll split it with you if you help me get out of this.”

Seth shook his head. “You are far too trusting of people, you know that, right? What if I had a gun? I could just take it.”

Avery shrugged. “Yeah, but you won’t. And you probably don’t.”

Seth’s mouth curled into a sideways smile. “Probably.” He considered for a moment. “All right. I’ll help you.” He regarded Avery. ‘You hungry?”

“Starving.”

“OK, I’ll order some room service, but we’ll have to split or it’ll look odd since I’m supposedly alone. If anyone’s watching for that kind of thing.”

‘Do you think they are?”

“How much did you steal?”

“Won. I won $3,000.”

“They are.” He tossed Avery a menu. “You can pick.”

Avery looked it over. “Um … steak, baked potato, salad, bottle of wine, and brownie sundae.”

“Skip the wine, we’ve got to stay sharp. And, really? Brownie sundae? You five?”

Avery looked at him. “Fine, Mr. Grownup, what would you order?”

“I don’t like dessert.”

Avery rolled his eyes.”Of course you don’t. Fiiine, coffee and creme brulee.”

Seth shook his head. “Skip the coffee. We need to get in some decent sleep because it might be our last chance for a while.”

Avery blew his hair off his face with an exaggerated breath. “OK, so what’s your plan?”

“Still working on it. Windows don’t open in this hotel and the maid’s cart doesn’t have enough space under it for anyone bigger than a nine year old to hide. I think better when I’m not hungry, though.” He picked up the phone and ordered the food.

“Do you mind if I take a shower?” Avery stood up.

“Help yourself. Though, hold on, I’d wait until after we eat. I mean, showers make noise and I'm here alone, remember? You should hide in the bathroom when they come.’

Avery regarded his new friend. “You have elevated paranoia to a new level.”

Seth shrugged. “Who’s currently hiding from a pit boss?”

Avery sighed. “Touche.”

Seth looked at him. “How long have you been on your own?”

“What makes you think---”

“Just answer the question.”

“Um, about a month.” Avery looked down at his shoes.

“Great, so you’re totally green. Just my luck. Fine, free lesson: Assume your enemy is smart and think like they would. You disappeared from view on the third floor. Therefore, a smart hotel manager is going to look for odd activity from people staying on floor 3 or higher, concentrating on this floor. Single room ordering double food, shower running when the occupant answers the door, both clues that maybe he’s not alone.”

“How do they know I’m not a guest?”

“They don’t. But they’re definitely watching for any out of the ordinary behavior. If they’re smart.”

Avery nodded. “How long have you been on your own?”

Seth shrugged. “Long enough.”

“Do you ever answer a question directly?”

“Not if I can help it.”

Avery sat on the bed. It bounced slightly under his weight. “There’s only one bed.”

“Very observant, California.”

Avery cocked his head. “Seattle. Close.”

Seth shrugged, a little smile on his face.

“You gonna make me sleep on the floor?” Avery asked.

“We’ll see.”

There was a knock on the door. Avery got up and hid in the bathroom, leaving the door ajar. He could hear Seth talking with someone and a clink of dishes, then the door shutting.

“Coast is clear.”

For a while there was no talking, only eating. Seth had ordered the largest steak on the menu and after eating Avery felt reasonably full for the first time in a long time. 

“Do I owe you for this?”

Seth shrugged. “No. I didn't pay for it.” A little smile played around his lips.

“So who did?”

Seth pulled out his wallet and pulled out a credit card. “Some dude named Robert Jeffries.” He put the card back.

“Won’t he notice the card’s gone?”

“Eventually. But he won’t call the cops.”

“Why not?”

“Because he’s here in Vegas without his wife but he does have company, if you know what I mean. He will cancel the card of course, once he realizes it’s missing but tonight he’s drunk as a skunk and it’s not his only card. Which brings me to lesson number 2: Never check out of a hotel in person.”

Avery looked at him. This dude was smart, reasonable, seemed decent enough, and to top it all off was sexy as hell. “Uh, you wouldn’t happen to be looking for a partner, would you?”

Seth cocked an eyebrow. “So far all I’ve seen of your skills is the ability to grab some money and run like hell.”

“I told you, I won that money.”

“Say I believe you. Why the hot pursuit?”

“They asked for ID when I cashed in the chips. I’m 17.”

Seth started laughing. “Oh my god are you a rookie.”

Avery glared at him. “I’m not stupid.”

“Yet it didn’t occur to you to get a fake ID first.”

“Well, no.”

“Rookie’s not the same as stupid, but it doesn’t matter if it amounts to the same thing.” Seth regarded him. “OK. I’ll take you on for one month to start, but we are not partners. You work for me, you do what I say, and we’ll see about equal shares once you’re less of a liability.”

Avery opened his mouth to protest but Seth held up a finger.

“I like you but not that much. You’re green, you’re not dumb but you are impulsive. You are likely to get us both shot unless you listen to me. I will give you the benefit of my hard-won wisdom but in exchange I get 70 percent of the take. Not negotiable. Starting with that nest egg in your pocket.”

Avery thought about it and realized Seth was right. A talent for counting cards and talking himself out of situations was only going to go so far. ‘OK. Deal.” He took out the bundle and handed $2,100 over to Seth.

“Good at math is a start.” Seth put the money in his wallet. “We’ll talk about your other skills later. You go take that shower now, you’re stinking up the joint.” He smiled when he said it to show he was kidding.

“Yeah, yeah.” Avery got up and went into the bathroom. He stopped and turned to look at Seth. “You’re still gonna be here, right?”

Seth smiled a slow broad smile.”You’re learning already. Yes. I’ll be here. Like I said, I like you.”

Avery nodded. “OK. Good.” He went to take a shower. After a long hot day in Vegas, not to mention running like hell through the hotel, the hot water felt good on his skin. He stood there for a while, just enjoying the shower and thinking about Seth. He wondered if he was gay. The way he dressed and his slow “we’ll see” about sharing a bed made Avery think he might be. An old saying of his father’s crept into his brain: “Don’t shit where you eat, son,” but fuck that. His father was the reason he was here, and not home trying out for the baseball team so fuck him and his so-called wisdom. He liked Seth, even if he didn’t trust him entirely. He half expected him to be gone when he emerged from the shower, but Avery had been alone for most of his life, isolated by the need to pretend to be something he wasn’t. Fuck that. If something developed between them, he wouldn’t be the one to say it was a bad idea.

Seth had both shoes and his socks off when Avery came back and was sitting on the floor in the space between the two chairs in the Lotus position, eyes closed. Avery hesitated, not sure what to do.

Seth opened his eyes. “All clean?”

Avery was wearing his jeans and nothing else at the moment. “Yep. You do yoga?”

“Yes.”

“Huh.”

“What?”

“Nothing. I mean, I’m from Seattle, dude. Yoga’s pretty ubiquitous there. Just didn’t expect it.”

“Clears my mind and keeps me flexible.”

Avery nodded. Tried and failed not to smile. “I’m all for flexible.”

Seth smiled too, a knowing look in his eyes. “I could teach you some if you wanted.”

“Yeah, that might be OK.”

“Right now I’m trying to figure out how to get us out of this hotel.”

“Right.” Avery mimed zipping his lips and flopped down on the bed instead. It was very comfortable. He spread out his arms and legs and stared at the ceiling.

“If that’s how you sleep you are definitely getting the floor.”

Avery rolled over and looked at Seth, resting his chin in his arms. ”Come up with anything?”

“Just bad ideas. We dress you in drag is the best one so far. You’re tall, but you’re thin and pretty enough to pass for a girl and it might work.”

“Awwww.” Avery fluttered his eyelashes. “You’re so sweet.”

Seth snorted.

“But you’re prettier than me. You could definitely pass.”

“My shoulders are too broad. I’ve tried it before and it doesn’t quite work.”

“Girls can have broad shoulders.”

“Yes, but if I’m trying to pass and they’re looking for a boy it’s risky. You have a more androgynous body.”

“I used to be more buff but … “ Avery shrugged.

“Not eating regularly will do that,” Seth said.

Avery nodded. “Now I’m just skinny.”

“Nothing wrong with that. It’s an easier body to disguise. My other thought is you and I look like we could be brothers. We’re both human and blonde, anyway, and people might not look too closely. If you wore my clothes and I wore yours we might get away with a bait and switch. You leave the hotel first, as me, carrying my suitcase and I come down in a bit. They might initially think I’m you but my hair’s a lot longer and they’re not going to detain me without reasonable cause.”

“And meanwhile I’m blocks away.”

“Yes. We can pick a rendezvous spot, like Caesar’s Palace. It’s five blocks from here. Have breakfast before we blow town.”

“Fuck you are smooth. I’d just hightail it outta town.”

Seth smiled. “Growing boys gotta eat.”

“I mean, that sounds like the best plan to me. Not like we can rappel off the roof.”

Seth nodded. “I agree.” He stood up. “I’m gonna take a shower too and then we should get some sleep.”

Avery eyed the floor.

“We can share as long as you don’t hog the bed.” Seth said, watching the direction of his gaze.

“OK, deal.”

Seth nodded and went into the bathroom, closing the door.

Avery considered sleeping in his jeans but that sounded really uncomfortable so he kicked them off and crawled under the covers in his briefs. He was asleep in seconds.

When he woke up he was alone in the bed, though it was clear Seth’s side had been disturbed. Avery sat up, rubbing his face. Seth was in a chair, drinking coffee, dressed in Avery’s jeans and T-shirt.

“What time is it?” Avery asked.

“Seven thirty. I’ve been meaning to ask, is this all of your stuff?”

Avery nodded. “Yeah. I left home with a backpack full of great stuff but these guys convinced me it wasn’t worth my life to argue about ownership.”

Seth winced. “Ouch. They took everything?”

“Yeah. I’m just glad they let me keep the clothes I was wearing.”

Seth sniffed his armpit. “These don’t smell too bad.”

“It happened two days ago. Gonna need a new shirt soon.”

“I have things you can wear while these are in the wash. But let’s get out of town first. We can shop for some new shit later.”

Avery nodded. 

Seth nodded at a neat pile on the other chair. “Help yourself.”

Avery took the clothes into the bathroom with him and freshened up before slipping them on. It was the same linen suit, this time with a light blue silk button-down shirt. Avery checked himself out in the mirror. Not half bad. He could get used to this. The shirt was so soft and he looked damned fine wearing it. The pants pooled only slightly at his ankles and the jacket shoulders sagged a bit but the clothes fit reasonably well.

Avery came back out. Seth was sizing his tennis shoe against his own foot. He looked up. 

“What size shoe do you wear?”

Avery told him.

“Cool, me too.” Seth pulled on one of Avery’s sweatsocks, looking at it with only slight distaste.

Avery found Seth’s shoes and socks neatly placed under the chair and sat down to put them on. The socks were fine-gauge and clean. “Sorry about the dirty socks.”

Seth shrugged. “I used to walk barefoot all summer long. This is far from the worst thing I’ve had on my feet.”

“That is not something I would have guessed about you.”

“Oh yeah? What would you have guessed?”

“I don’t know, cotillions and brunch.”

Seth scoffed. “Because I’m southern?”

“Because you placed your socks folded on your goddamned shoes.”

Seth seemed amused. “Nothing wrong with a little precision.” He finished tying Avery’s shoes on his feet. “Ready?”

Avery nodded. “Think this will work?”

“Only one way to find out.”

Avery nodded, feeling suddenly nervous, and stood up.

“Don’t forget the suitcase.” Seth nodded toward a plain brown suitcase standing next to the door.

“Wish me luck.”

“I already signed the receipt. Just walk straight out of the hotel.”

Avery nodded.

“Good luck.”

He nodded again and left the room carrying the suitcase. “OK, be cool, just walk out, just don’t let them know you’re nervous.”

He took the elevator to the lobby and headed toward the door. Two large trolls in three-piece suits stepped in front of him. One of them, with dark grey skin and horns like an Ibex’s, was tall enough to block the light, the other, with lighter grey skin and tiny nubs for horns, was twice the width of his companion. Their tails were twitching, never a good sign. “Mr. Jeffries?”

“Huh? No.”

“We’re going to have to check your wallet.”

“Um, sure.” He reached into his pocket, not sure whose wallet he was about to pull out and to his relief it was his own. He handed it over. “Uh, what’s this about?” the nervousness in his voice was real but he figured any kid would be shitting his pants.

The troll looked through the wallet. “No card. Just cash.” He took out Avery’s driver’s license, which still had his father’s last name on it. Avery hoped these guys weren’t tapped into the FBI database of runaway kids. He somehow doubted it. He showed it to the other troll.

“You from Seattle, kid?” Troll 1 asked.

Avery nodded, swallowed.

“You here on vacation by yourself?”

“What? No.” Avery thought fast. Seventeen year olds weren’t allowed their own hotel rooms. “My father’s here on business and he had to go to an early meeting. I’m just … meeting him after. In fact, I’m a little late.” He looked at his watch, or rather Seth’s, grateful that it was expensive looking.

The second troll was looking nervous now. “Uh, Mercer, I think we oughta let the kid go.”

Avery realized he knew who his father was. Oh, fuck. Shit. Not what he needed. He decided to use it to his advantage anyway. “Yes. He hates to be kept waiting.”

“Jaxson, this kid was in the room.”

“May I ask what this is about, gentlemen?” Avery tried to keep his voice polite. Across the room something caught his eye: Seth arguing with two more trolls. Shit. Avery tore his glance away.

“Your room was charged to someone else’s credit card.”

“You’re kidding.” Avery hoped he managed to look incredulous. 

“The man complained to the management.”

“It must have been some sort of clerical error. My father would be happy to repay him.”

“Do you have his credit card on you?”

“No, of course not.”

“Then we have a problem.”

“Not really. I have it memorized. Got a pen?”

Ten minutes later Avery was on his way to Caesars Palace in a solicitously provided free town car, mouth dry and heart thumping. He had no idea how Seth was planning to get out of this but he couldn’t help him. And then another thought occurred: those men might contact his father. He hoped their fear of disturbing him outweighed their need to check the credit card and by the time his father checked his accounts he and Seth would be long gone.

He ordered breakfast at the casino and waited nervously for his new friend, barely noticing what he ordered. The minutes seemed to last hours before the door opened and Seth, looking only slightly sweaty, came in. He raised his hand just a bit so Seth would see him. Seth crossed the room quickly and sat down.

“We should go,” they both said at the same time.

“We shouldn’t be seen together,” Seth said, as Avery’s food arrived. His eyebrows almost left his face. “Mickey Mouse strawberry pancakes? Again, I contend that you are five.”

Avery looked down at his plate. “I had no idea what I was ordering.”

“Well, leave them cash and let’s go.”

Avery nodded, tossing $20 on the table as they both got up.

As they headed for the door two all too familiar figures entered the casino: Mercer and Jaxson from the hotel.

“Shit,” Avery said. “Those are the guys who talked to me.”

The trolls were talking with the pretty hostess and did not appear to have noticed them. 

“This way,” Seth said, taking Avery’s arm and heading toward the Concierge desk exit. The boys walked fast, avoiding flat out running until they heard, “HEY” behind them. Avery looked back. The two trolls were charging toward them, their horns adding to the impression of two very angry bulls.

“Run,” Avery said, his voice squeaking a bit.

They tore from the exit and out onto the street, which was beginning to fill up with tourists. Seth and Avery dodged between surprised families and couples and tore down the street, Avery carrying Seth’s suitcase. 

“We need to lose them,” Seth said, grabbing Avery’s arm and ducking into the next available casino and slowing to a quick walk. They hurried through a rabbit warren of rooms and found a side door. Out on the street taxis were queuing.

“Come on,” Seth said, hurrying to one taxi just as a couple got in.

Avery knocked on the window of the next in line.

“Can you kids pay?”

Avery dug $100 out of his wallet and waved it at him.

“Where to?”

They piled in.

“Bus station, and you can keep the change on that hundred if you get there in 15 minutes.” Seth said.

The man floored the gas and they lurched into traffic with a blaring of horns and shouts from onlookers.

Avery looked back. Mercer and Jaxson had just left the second casino and were looking up and down the street. He ducked down.

They piled out at the bus station 12 minutes later. Avery gave the man the hundred dollar bill and they hurried inside. The building smelled like disinfectant that couldn’t quite mask the pungency of urine. Avery wrinkled his nose.

“Where to?” he asked Seth.

“Come with me.” Seth led him to a map of the United States behind a row of blue plastic seats. “Close your eyes.”

Avery looked at him.

“Trust me.”

Avery closed his eyes. Seth spun him around three times. “Hey.”

“Keep ‘em closed.”

“What are you--”

“Point.”

Avery hesitated.

“Humor me. Just stick out your finger.”

Avery gave him the finger.

Seth laughed. “Good enough. You just flipped the bird at New Mexico.”

Avery opened his eyes. “So?”

“So, we go to Albuquerque.” 

Avery looked at him blankly.

Seth sighed. “It’s a totally random choice, not influenced by our preferences. Harder to find us.”

“Ohhh.”

“Come on, Einstein. We’re paying cash.”

They went to the window and Seth bought them two one-way tickets to Albuquerque. The woman asked them for their IDs and Avery’s heart sank but he kept quiet. Their bus left in one hour so they bought beef jerky and Snicker’s bars from the vending machine and went to sit outside on a little patio for people waiting for their buses.

“We might have a problem,” Avery said. “I can’t travel under my real name. I need a fake ID or my dad’s gonna find me.”

“How the hell you get to Vegas?”

“Walked, hitched, stowed away. That’s how I got robbed, my last hitch.”

Seth shook his head. “OK. So we get off in Reno. We can get what we need there.”

Avery nodded. “How’d you get away?” He kept his voice down even though they were the only ones there at the moment.

“Well, they obviously had the wrong kid since I’m 21 and didn’t have any of the money on me.” Seth managed to look angelic. “I just acted offended and asked them if being blonde was now a crime.”

“You’re 21?” Avery’s heart sank. Fuck. There went his chance of romance.

“Nah. I’m 18 but 21’s much more convenient.”

Avery grinned at him. “Gotcha.” Whew.

“I think you’re gonna get away with 19, max, though, with that baby face.”

Avery stuck out his tongue.

“I rest my case.”

“How about you?”

“I had to give them my ID and my dad is … kind of a big deal in some circles. They recognized his name, which means now that they know I was lying they’ve probably called him and found out I ran away. They’ll be looking for us.”

“Fuck. This’ll be the first place they look. We can’t get on that bus.” Seth stood up and grabbed the suitcase. “Let’s go.”

“Hey, you said you didn’t have the money on you … where is it?”

Seth held up the suitcase. “You had it.”

“Oh.”

“Come on, we gotta go.” Seth did a one-handed vault over the low fence, still holding the suitcase, and took off down the street. Avery struggled a bit more with the fence but managed to catch up. His feet slipped in the leather-soled dress shoes and he crashed into Seth, who had stopped for a traffic light. Seth stumbled a little but managed to right them both after a minute.

“How the fuck do you run in these shoes?”

Seth shrugged. “Practice.” He looked up and down the street. “This way.”

Avery followed him under a series of underpasses to a decidedly less attractive part of town. Trash blew past them on the desert wind. It was a hot day that was just warming up. Avery missed the coolness of Seattle but almost nothing else about his hometown. It wasn’t that Seattle was a bad place to live, but every memory was imbued with his father’s presence.

They crossed a railroad track and came upon a chain link fence, beyond which was a train yard. Seth looked around.

“See anyone?”

Avery looked. “Not right now.”

“Keep a lookout.”

Avery nodded as Seth opened up the suitcase and took something out.

“What are you--”

“Just keep a lookout, OK?”

“OK.” Avery scanned the area as Seth did whatever it was he was doing. He could hear the fence rattling for a bit, and then the suitcase opening and closing again.

“Come on,” Seth said, and Avery turned in time to see the other boy duck through the neat hole he’d just cut in the fence.

“You carry a wire snippers?”

Seth smiled at him, walking backwards as Avery slipped through the hole. “Come on.”

They snuck across the train yard to a line of hitched boxcars, which were bumping into each other slightly like impatient animals waiting for the gate to open. Most of the doors were shut tight but Seth approached one with the door open just a crack and swung himself up. He looked inside briefly before setting down the suitcase and reaching a hand down for Avery. 

As he did so the train lurched forward.

“Hurry.”

Avery jumped and caught Seth’s hand as the train started to leave the train yard. For one heart stopping moment he was dangling in thin air, sure he was going to fall under the train but Seth slipped through the crack in the door, pulling him after. Avery squeezed through, falling against Seth, who fell on his ass, Avery tumbling after, landing partly on his friend.

Seth started to laugh. After a while so did Avery. 

“Whooo!” Seth whooped.

Through the crack in the door they could see the train was picking up speed. Avery smelled hay and looked up to see a herd of cows watching them with mild surprise. A short gate kept the herd contained, with a small area left over. Someone had stacked a few hay bales against the wall.

Avery rolled off of Seth. Seth got up and sat on a hay bale and Avery went to join him. 

“Those are cows.”

Seth actually giggled. “Um, yeah, no fooling you.”

“Aren’t they, you know, dangerous?”

Seth looked at him with poorly suppressed amusement. “Not generally, though that one looks like it could be packing.”

Avery snorted. “I’m serious. Those are some big animals.” He’d never been face to face with a cow before. He’d met cars that were smaller.

“Relax. Cows are pretty placid unless something riles them up. Anyway, the gate’ll hold them.”

“If you say so.” Avery eyed the animals nervously.

Seth scoffed. “City boy.”

“You’re not?”

“Nope.”

“Where’d you grow up?”

Seth regarded him. “Tell you when I know you better.”

“Oh, come on, not even a state?”

Seth raised an eyebrow. “You’re a pest.”

Avery grinned at him.

“Fine. Georgia.”

“See? Was that so hard?”

Seth chuckled. ‘I still contend you are a pest.”

“Yeah, probably.” Avery felt a warm surge of happiness. He hadn’t felt this light since he was a little kid.

Seth smiled at him. 

“What?”

Seth shook his head. “Nothing.”

“Thanks, by the way.”

“For what?” Seth leaned back against the wall of the freight car and closed his eyes.

“Getting me out of Vegas. Not getting mad about wasting money on those bus tickets. Agreeing to take me on. Take your pick.”

Seth opened his eyes and looked at Avery for a long moment, his expression slightly solemn. “You’re welcome.”

Avery nodded. “You don’t like talking about yourself.”

“No.” Seth closed his eyes again.

“Is that part of what you learned on the road? Or have you just always been like that?”

“Yes.”

Avery sighed. “Yeah, makes sense. People can use things against you.”

“I do have to ask, though,” Seth said, turning to look at Avery again. “How badly does your father want you found? Sounds like he’s got the money to pay for it.”

Avery nodded. “I don’t know. He does, but I left a note … so maybe not.”

“Must have been some note.”

“It was.” It had taken all of Avery’s courage to write it. Thinking about it still made him feel a kind of giddy panic.

Seth was quiet.

“Don’t you want to know what it said?”

“Do you want to tell me?”

Avery looked at his new friend and decided he was done with the lies. ”My father is a huge homophobe. He told me once that if I were gay he’d as soon I was dead. The note said, fuck you dad I’m gay.”

Seth blinked. Regarded Avery for a very long moment before saying, “That took guts.”

Avery nodded, hating himself for feeling a little teary. “Uh, thanks.” He brushed away a tear, looked away.

Seth tactfully did not mention it, turning his gaze to the cows instead. “Your dad sounds like an asshole.”

“Oh, he is. I just … he’s my dad, you know? It took me a long time to admit to myself I didn’t need his approval or support.”

“Understandable.”

‘I thought I could stick it out until college but .. something just kind of broke in me. I was at this party and there was a guy who was so cute, and nice, and before I knew it we were making out and I just … I couldn’t live a lie anymore. I couldn’t wait two more years to let someone touch me, out of fear or whatever. I was so drunk at that party, just to get my courage up, and … afterwards I just cried like a fucking baby.” He stopped. “Sorry.”

“For what?” Seth sounded surprised.

“I dunno. Oversharing.” Avery was mortified at the tear that was rolling down his cheek and hastily brushed it away.

“Don’t be. Tears aren’t something to be ashamed of. Neither are feelings. It means you still have the capacity to be a good person. People who never cry are not to be trusted.”

Avery nodded. “Do you cry?”

Seth smiled, a slightly wicked smile. “Not very often.”

Avery laughed, more of a hiccup. “So you’re saying I shouldn’t trust you?”

“I’m saying you shouldn’t trust anyone, Avery. I don’t want to make you promises I can’t keep.”

Avery looked at him. “That’s why I trust you.”

Seth looked at him for a long moment before turning back to looking at the cows. “You really shouldn’t.”

“Why not?”

Seth sighed. “Because I wouldn’t betray you on purpose, but there may come a time when it’s my skin or yours. If you’re in a position like that I wouldn’t blame you for betraying me, either. Sometimes life hands you some pretty sucky decisions.”

Avery nodded. “OK. That’s fair. I’m not asking you to die for me, or … I don’t know, lose a finger even. I just … “ He shook his head.

Seth closed his eyes. ‘I’m just not a safe person to be with, Avery.”

“Fuck that.”

Seth looked at him.

“Being with you is a helluva lot safer than being on my own and I like you so fuck you I’m sticking around. That was the deal.”

Seth looked at him for a long moment before nodding. “OK.”

“Good.” Avery felt like crying again. He hugged himself and stared at the cows.

Seth sighed. After a moment he patted Avery’s knee. “I like you too.”

Avery sniffed and nodded.

Seth took his hand back. “We need to get you a fake ID. Do you have a new last name in mind?”

“Grey. Avery Grey.”

“I like it.”

“Thanks. What’s yours?”

“Patrick.”

“Nice.”

Seth nodded. “You’re not the only one doesn’t want to be found. I chose my name, but I think it suits me.”

“It does. I like it.”

Seth smiled slightly. “Thanks.”

“Don’t suppose you’re gonna tell me why you left home.”

“No.”

Avery shrugged. “Worth a try. How about your favorite color? Or is that top secret too?”

Seth smiled a little. “Grey.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Nope.”

“Mine’s pink.”

“Huh.”

“I used to pretend it was red.”

Seth looked at him. 

“Girl’s color and everything.”

“Yeah, I got that, just thinking, how stupid that is.”

“Uh, thanks?” Avery was slightly offended.

“No, not you pretending. That you had to. It’s a fucking color.”

“Oh. Yeah. You’re right.”

“Speaking of girls, I thought about disguising one or both of us as one but it’s not sustainable. Still, it helps to have a couple of disguises handy. What do you think of Amish?”

“Amish.”

“Yeah, people just look at the clothing not the person. I thought about it in the past but wasn’t sure if one Amish kid would travel alone. But two, that might work.”

“Huh. Yeah. But we’d need the clothing.”

“True. We’d have to find an Amish community and I’m not sure they sell their clothes. They probably make them.”

Avery nodded. “Yeah, that’d complicate things.” He thought. “We could dye our hair.”

“Well, I mean, I grew mine out. I used to have short hair. That’s a disguise in itself. Changes your whole face.”

Avery nodded. His own hair was a bit shaggy after a month of not cutting it but he thought he still looked pretty much the same. “Still, a different color couldn’t hurt.”

“It’s not enough, though. You need a whole look. Something that’ll make them look at that and not you. Punk rocker, heavy metal dudes, Jehovah’s witness … “

Avery laughed. “Yeah, please not that. You got any water? I’m parched.”

Seth opened his suitcase and handed over a thermos. “It’s gonna be warm.”

“It’s fine. Thanks.” He opened it up and took a sip. The water was warm and tasted slightly metallic.

“You can have more if you want.”

Avery drank a bit more and handed it back.

Seth drank some too before putting it away. 

“How long do you think we should stay on this train?”

“Until it starts to slow down. We don’t want to get caught. But it should take us a fair ways from Vegas by then.”

“Hold on. When it starts to slow down?”

Seth grinned. “Yep.”

“So, we’re going to jump from a moving train?” Avery’s voice squeaked a little on the word jump.

“Yes.”

“Fuck.”

Seth laughed. “It’ll be fine. I do it all the time.”

Avery nodded doubtfully.

“It’ll be fun, you’ll see. Remind you you’re alive.”

“For the last five seconds of my life, sure.”

Seth laughed. “Trust me.”

“You just got done telling me I shouldn’t do that.”

Seth’s only answer was a wicked grin.

“You’re not making me feel any better, you know.”

Seth’s grin grew.

Avery gave him a side-eye. “You do it all the time, huh.”

“Yes. You just need to jump clear of the train.”

“OK. How do you know it’s not just slowing down for a railroad crossing?”

“They don’t work that way. I mean, sure, if there’s another train ahead it’ll slow but for the most part the trains just push on through. It’s the cars have to wait.”

“How do you know all this? You some kind of train savant?”

Seth smiled enigmatically. “Something like that.”

“Oh, right. Country boy.”

Seth shrugged. “Guilty. You’ll see. Piece of cake. And, it beats getting caught.”

Avery couldn’t argue with that. They settled in to wait. It was too dark in there to read even if Avery had thought to bring a book. He glanced at Seth. The other boy looked perfectly composed, sitting up straight on the hay bale, hands resting palms up on his lap.

“How do you deal with the boredom?”

Seth looked at him. “It’s been an hour, tops.”

“I mean in general. You spend a lot of time alone, what do you do?”

“I read, if there’s light. Meditate. Exercise if I can but I don’t feel like scaring those cows. Think about what I’m going to do in the next town. Practice card tricks. Sleep.”

“Jerk off.”

Seth snorted. “Not with an audience.”

“Doubt the cows care.”

Seth gave him the side-eye.

“I meant before I showed up!”

“Sure.”

“So what are we going to do in the next town?” Avery asked, changing the subject.

Seth grinned at him, not fooled. “Get you an ID, try to get further lost.”

“Do you know how to buy a fake ID?”

Seth shrugged. “I know how to make one.”

“Oh. Cool.”

“I mean, it won’t fool everyone, but mine’s worked pretty well so far.”

Avery nodded. “Good enough.”

“I think we should say you’re 18.”

“Why not 19?”

“Not sure anyone’d buy it.”

“Hey.”

“Hey yourself, baby face.”

“Shut up.”

Seth grinned at him. “Yes, you’re right, you do seem super mature.”

“Fuckhead.”

Seth laughed.

Avery smiled. He was finding it hard to even pretend to be in a bad mood. 

They were quiet for a while.

“Do you think cows jerk off?” Avery asked.

Seth thought for a minute, watching the cows. “I’m sure they get horny sometimes.”

Avery started giggling uncontrollably. “That’s so baaad.” 

Seth’s shoulders shook with suppressed laughter. He was grinning.

After another companionable silence Avery asked, “So what do you think we should do next?”

“Well, thanks to you we have a decent amount of money. I’d say find some little backwater town and just lie low. Wash dishes for cash, get a small place, just you know, be for a while.”

“Huh.”

“What, you thought I was going to tell you about a heist I was planning or a con or something?”

Avery shrugged. “Something like that.”

“This isn’t television. I’m not a master criminal. I’m an 18-year-old kid living hand to mouth and just trying to get by. I’m better at it than most but I say, let’s enjoy the good life for a bit.”

“It’s not that much money.”

“It’s more than I’ve had for a while, and we can make it last. Trust me, I’m an expert at that. The trick is to find someplace where people aren’t too nosy, and where we won’t go stir crazy within a day. Personally, I think the bayou would be a good hidey hole.”

“Like in Louisiana?” Avery looked at him.

Seth nodded. “We might get lucky, find an abandoned shack or something where we can fish for our food. We could live there a long time without anyone giving a shit, I would think. And it’s pretty down there, if you don’t mind the heat and a few bugs.”

“Or gators.”

“I prefer gators to small-town busybodies. And anyway, they don't go hunting for humans. You just gotta be careful not to accidentally piss one off.”

“OK, let’s go there, then.”

“We have to take a roundabout route, though. Just in case your dad is looking for you. Get your fake ID, take a bus somewhere boring, like Kansas, find a way to lose the trail there.”

Avery nodded. “Hitch a ride or something.”

“Yeah, but you have to be careful. There are a lot of assholes out there.”

Avery nodded again. “Well, there’s always walking, but we’re trading shoes. Which reminds me.” He took off Seth’s shoes and socks and handed them over. “I want my tennies back.”

Seth laughed. “We might as well swap our clothes back, yeah. Not like these cows care if they see us in our skivvies.”

“Skivvies.” Avery grinned.

Seth rolled his eyes. “Do you want to borrow a clean shirt?”

“That’d be great, yeah. Thanks.”

They stripped. Seth, it turned out, was a boxers man. Avery found it hard not to stare at his body: it might be underfed but it was beautiful: broad shoulders and slim hips and pale smooth skin. Seth caught him looking and Avery quickly looked down.

“Aren’t those bunchy?”

“Boxers? No.” He could hear the smile in Seth’s voice and felt his own ears grow hot.

“I always thought they’d get bunched up.” He finished pulling on his jeans. Seth handed him a short-sleeved button down shirt, green checked. He put it on. “Thanks.”

He looked up from buttoning to see Seth watching him with an unreadable expression on his face.

“What?”

Seth shook his head. He had put away the suit and was wearing faded blue jeans and a white short sleeved button down over a grey t-shirt. He took a hair tie out of his bag and concentrated on putting his hair into a messy bun. When it was down his pale hair hung halfway down his back. 

Avery, afraid he’d crossed some sort of line he didn’t understand, folded his dirty t-shirt. “Could I put this in the suitcase?”

Seth nodded.

“Never seen a guy wear his hair like that,” Avery ventured, putting the shirt away. Seth had a small collection of clothes in there, neatly folded, plus a leather case Avery assumed held the wire snips, among possible other items. He didn’t see the money.

“It’s hot on my neck. This car’s really stuffy.”

Avery nodded. “Should I shut the case?”

“Hold on.” Seth came over and retrieved a pair of canvas deck shoes, putting the dress shoes away, and clipped the case shut. He sat down on the hay bale to put them on, sans socks.

Avery still felt a wall had gone up and wasn’t sure what he had done to cause it. He felt a little panicky. He felt he’d made and lost a friend in very short order. He sat down on the hay bale, picking at the straw. He realized he was putting way too much emphasis on Seth’s every action. Relax, he told himself. He looked up in time to see Seth looking away.

“So, um … wonder how much longer it’s gonna be.”

Seth shrugged. “I hope a while, actually. The further we can get from Vegas the better.”

Avery nodded. “Yeah, good thinking.”

After a long uncomfortable silence of Avery looking everywhere but at Seth Seth sighed. 

“Please stop looking like a kicked puppy.”

Avery looked up, wide-eyed. “Sorry. I’m sorry.”

Seth put the suitcase, which was between them, down on the floor and came to sit next to Avery. He didn’t say anything for a long time. Avery looked up at him. He seemed to be thinking. “I can see what’s happening here,” he said finally. “And I’m fine with most of it.”

“Sorry, with what?” 

“It’s hard to find people you trust on the road, so when you find someone you do you don’t want to just throw it away. And let’s face it, I’m hot, you’re adorable, we know where this is going. Just, I … to me sex and love are two very different things and it seems to me that maybe for you that isn’t the case.”

Of all the things that Seth might have said this was the last thing Avery expected. “Um.”

“I’m not saying don’t be you,” Seth said, looking at his hands now. “And don’t get me wrong, I’ve got your back. I just …” he looked up. “Monogamy, romance, not my style. I thought it needed saying.”

Avery took a deep breath. “Honestly, I don’t know how I feel about those things, either.” He hated how his voice shook as he said, “I’ve just been alone for so long. I just … I’m so tired of being alone. I’m not looking for promises, just … I mean, it matters to me if you like me or not but mostly I just … “

Seth put his hand on his face and kissed him.


	2. Lost in the Swamp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His first thought was, if this guy’s not friendly I’m dead.

Chapter Two

Four Years Later

Seth woke up in a ditch, his face in the grass. Everything hurt. For a minute he had no idea where he was or how he got there. He tried and failed to open both eyes, had to settle for the right one. His right hand, resting on the bank next to him, was one big bruise and his left was throbbing with pain. Seth rolled over and his entire body screamed its protest. The sky was struggling to waken. A slit of light slowly rising over the horizon turned the swamp varying colors of blues and greys. 

Right. Louisiana bayou country. The night before came in fits and starts, ending with him having just enough presence to lie perpendicular to the gully, feet down, his head near the road, concealed from sight and less likely to drown. His legs and feet were wet, his favorite shoes a ruin. His clothes were caked with mud. He sat up with a groan, feeling suddenly old. His stuff was gone, Avery was god knows where. The boat he’d stolen had sunk somewhere in the swamp.

Avery. God. Seth was suddenly awake. Avery had missed the rendezvous in Baton Rouge, and two thugs had showed up in his stead, which meant they had his boy. He’d betrayed Seth like Seth had told him to do in this kind of situation. He only hoped that had kept him alive. He pushed that thought aside. He wouldn’t think about that right now. He just had to find him.

But first he had to stand up. This took a few tries. His legs, thankfully, were apparently fine but his ribs were another story. He finally managed to roll into a crouch and pull himself up on a shrub with his less-injured right hand. He was pretty sure his left hand was broken from punching thug number one in the face. Dude was made of rocks, apparently.

He staggered to the road, feeling like an extra in a monster movie. His feet squelched unpleasantly in his waterlogged shoes. Those had been Italian, now they were trash. He wanted to take off his soggy socks but couldn’t reach his feet without considerable pain. He looked up and down the road, which stretched to his left and his right with no signage or other clues. Flip a coin, Patrick. He turned right. The road was in need of paving and he had to walk carefully to keep from stumbling. He didn’t allow himself to think whether a town might be near. Just keep walking.

As he walked, he took inventory. His left eye was swollen shut. His nose was thankfully not broken but his jaw was not having a good day. Ribs, at least one cracked. Hands, hurting. OK. He could deal. Shallow breaths, slow steps. One foot in front of the other and pray you’re heading toward civilization.

As he trudged along the sun came up behind him. Birds sang their greetings to the morning. No cars passed. One step, two steps, twenty. A hundred. Just keep going. Avery needs you. Fucking Avery. He knew he was being a big softy by taking that kid on. Serve you right you big dummy. You’re better off alone. No one to worry about, or rat you out, or fucking die on you--Avery had better be alright, that’s all he could say. You had just better be alright, Grey.

He tried to think of other things. His childhood, before things had gone bad. Running barefoot through the woods with his friends, fishing, laughing, pulling mostly harmless pranks. Learning to play cards, and whistle like a pro, and avoid chores. Learning his grandfather was a racist asshole … OK, different memory. Too late to swerve away from it, his childhood best friend’s hurt face swam before his eyes. Can’t come to my party, my grandpa won’t let you … sneaking off and having their own party in the woods and the tanning he’d gotten when he got back … Malcolm’s dad saying your heart’s in the right place son but you and my son should part ways for both your sakes. Crying for days … Christ. 

Avery. Think of Avery. The way his ears go red when you catch him checking you out. Not so much anymore, but when they first met … Seth had considered ditching him that first freight train ride. He could see where this was going, and friends were expensive. You could end up dead, especially with a tenderfoot like that. But that was the coward’s way out, and he’d left home so he could live life on his own terms. Running from Avery would have meant he was letting fear call the shots. Might as well go home if you’re just gonna run from the good stuff because you’re scared. Life was risky, love was risky, caring about people had a price.

Fucker better be OK or I’ll kill him myself.

He was thirsty, god, so thirsty. As the sun rose slowly in the sky he stopped being aware of his surroundings so much as the pain in his body and the godawful thirst. He couldn’t drink swamp water, who knows what lived in that, even if he could reach the swamp in his condition. Delirious, he trudged on, his thoughts fuzzy now, just coming to him in blurs of memory. His mother’s funeral. The look on his grandfather’s face when he’d told him what he’d done. The final straw. 

Last night was coming back, too, in fits and starts. Realizing it wasn’t Avery at the door. Jumping out the window only to find two more thugs in the street. Fighting over the suitcase and dropping it in favor of running for his life. Being chased all the way to the bayou and finding that boat. Praying Avery was smart enough to get out of this by himself because he was in no position to help. 

He was jerked back to the present by a sound. Wood rattling under his feet. He was on a bridge. He looked up and saw a gas station just across the bridge, a ramshackle red building with a hand painted sign that said Alphonse’s, with two gas pumps outside and a bench nearby. No one appeared to be there.

Seth shuffled to the bench and sat down hard. He leaned his head back against the rough-hewn siding of the building and that was the last thing he remembered for a while. He heard voices but couldn’t focus on them. He wasn’t thirsty anymore. At one point he thought he was floating, and then he was in warm water, and then nothing.

When he woke up he was alone, in a bed. Early morning sunlight slanted through the window. The bed was a double, with an orange and brown striped afghan for a blanket over yellow sheets with daisies on them. The door to the room was painted blue and was closed. His body hurt but not as much as it had. He really had to pee.

He sat up carefully. Both his hands were bandaged. He was wearing faded grey pajama pants with cartoon characters on them. His ribs protested only mildly to the change in position. His body was clean and smelled faintly of hibiscus. He stood up.

The door opened as he turned toward it and a skinny goldblood troll wearing a t-shirt that said Sunshine State My Ass and ripped blue jeans stood there. “Oh, hey, you’re awake.” Their voice was light and pleasant with a slight Southern accent. “I was just coming to check on you.”

“That’s … “ Seth stopped. His jaw hurt like hell when he moved it.

“Yeah, don’t try to talk right now. That brick wall you disagreed with really did a number on your face. I’m guessing since you’re up you want the bathroom?”

Seth nodded gratefully. The troll stepped out of the way and pointed. “Next door down.”

Seth went to use the facilities. The bathroom was very clean with the expected fixtures and a couple of unexpected ones: a wall decoration that said “If it ain’t broke we can fix that” and a badly rendered pencil drawing of a flamingo. 

When he emerged the troll was still there. “Hiya. I'm Rory by the way, he/him, the town doctor. Two of my friends brought you here. Your clothes are a loss, I’m afraid. We did sew up the tail hole for you on those, though.”

Seth automatically felt behind him, nodded. That was nice of them. Trolls chose their gender, usually upon reaching puberty, and were in the habit of introducing themselves along with said gender.

“I’ll bet you’re hungry. Think you can make those stairs?” He pointed to a stairwell leading down. “If not I can do room service.”

Seth shrugged and walked to the stairs, hoping that indicated that he was willing to give them a try. It wasn’t fun but his body cooperated. Rory followed his slow descent, still talking.

“You’re a fast healer. Your ribs are only cracked, you’ll be glad to know, should be OK in a week or two and your eye’s already looking better.”

Seth still couldn’t see out of it but nodded. 

“I was mostly worried about your high fever but it came down fast enough. I think you were just dehydrated, maybe had a little heat stroke. I thought it might be infection but you’re fine.”

Seth nodded again. He’d made it to the bottom. Rory moved around him.

“This way to food.”

Seth smiled a little and followed him to the kitchen. Regretted the smile instantly. Holy fuck his jaw hurt.

“Have a seat.” His host indicated a rectangular kitchen table. 

Seth looked around for a piece of paper and pencil and saw a pad on the counter. He walked over and picked it up before sitting. His left hand was so bandaged there was no way he was going to be able to use it for writing so he decided to try his right. His writing was clumsy, like a five year old’s and even a couple of words made his hand throb.

“Hey, be careful, you have some seriously bruised knuckles on that hand. Your left hand’s a bit broken, I’m afraid.”

Seth nodded, pushed the paper toward Rory, who was setting down a bowl of soup for him.

It said, “Need clothes.”

“Sure, pal, we can get you some soon.”

Seth shook his head. Wrote laboriously, “Now.”

“You’re not in any shape to go anywh--”

Seth wrote, “Friend.”

Rory eyes got a little bigger. He sat down across from Seth. “You have a friend who’s still in trouble from the people who did that?”

Seth nodded emphatically. 

“Eat your soup. I can make a couple phone calls. I have friends who can help you.”

Seth wrote “No money.”

Rory said, “You don’t need money.” He sounded intense, like a man who’d found the holy land. 

Seth wasn’t sure he trusted that but realized he was in no position to argue. Even if he could make it back to Baton Rouge it wasn’t like he could fight, or hell, talk. His stomach growled audibly.

Rory gave him a look.

He ate. The spoon was too much of a challenge so he ended up picking up the bowl and drinking it. The soup had a tomato base with sausages, beans, and vegetables. It was delicious and apparently homemade.

Rory took out his phone and made a call. “Hey, Fee, you busy?” He waited. “Our friend from the gas station’s awake and tells me he has a friend who’s still in the clutches of the people who tried to make him into hamburger.” Pause. “Yeah. OK. Sounds good.”

He hung up. “He and his girlfriend are on their way. He’s the town investigator and she’s … formidable. If anyone can find your friend it’s them.” He noticed Seth’s empty bowl. “Like some more?”

Seth nodded. Rory brought him more soup and a glass of apple juice. He sat down to watch him eat. When he had finished Rory said, “You got a name?”

Seth wrote his name on the paper.

“Seth. Nice name. How about your friend? If you can give me some details before they get here it’ll save time.”

Seth wrote Avery Grey on the paper.

“Gender? Age? Human?”

Seth carefully wrote the answers to a bunch of questions Rory asked. He was surprised at how tiring it was, just writing.

There was a knock on the door. Rory went to answer it and came back with two people. Seth wasn’t sure what he’d imagined exactly. Maybe a dude in a trench coat and fedora with a rockabilly sweetheart. Whatever he’d imagined, it wasn’t this.

Fee was a wiry shortish human white dude with a four-inch black mohawk and enough earrings in his left ear to start his own jewelry store, wearing a black Nirvana T-shirt, tight black jeans, and black boots, a toothpick dangling from his mouth. The girlfriend … 

Fee’s girlfriend was a nearly seven foot tall troll if you counted her horns, of which there were three times the normal amount, creating a thicket above her tangled black locks. Her entire muscular body seemed covered in tattoos. She had enormous fangs that looked like they could take his head off and … two tails? Her skin was greenish. Seth couldn’t tell if she was oliveblood or something else. She wore a sexy halter top and cutoff jeans shorts. She was barefoot: trolls had feet that were more like a dog’s than a human’s so most did not wear shoes.

Both of them seemed to be not much older than Seth.

“Seth, meet Fjordan O’Malley and Kiver Rose. Guys, this is Seth. He can’t talk very easily so I’ve been getting him to tell me about his missing friend.” Rory held up the pad of paper.

“Ta, Rory, good thinking.” Fjordan had a thick Irish accent. He and Kiver sat down at the table, Kiver next to Seth. He glanced at her. She smiled back. “So,” Fjordan said, “What can you tell us about them so far?”

“His name’s Avery Grey, human male, white, blonde hair, brown eyes, slim build. Just shy of six feet tall, 21 years old, last seen in Baton Rouge.”

“I’ve found people on less. What was he wearing?”

Seth wrote: “Nice suit.”

“Where’s he likely to go if he escapes their clutches?”

Seth thought. Wrote, “Lie low.”

Fjordan nodded. “You two get caught cheating at cards?”

Seth did a so-so with his right hand, like “close enough.” Actually, it was spot on but he didn’t know these people well enough to admit that.

“OK, this oughta help. What day was this?”

Seth thought, wrote down the date.

“So, two days ago. OK. Got any locations for me?”

Seth wrote down the name of the club where they’d been playing and the name of the hotel he’d escaped from and tried not to dwell on all the things that could have happened to Avery in two days.

“OK, gives me a neighborhood anyway. Thanks. We’ll get your friend back if we can. Come on, Kiver, let’s book.”

“Thank you,” Seth said.

Fee nodded. 

They stood up and left without further ceremony, leaving Seth to wonder what kind of person did a favor for someone just because they needed it. He stood up too, and wobbled.

“Okay,” Rory said, hopping up and siding a shoulder under Seth’s. “Let’s get you upstairs.”

When Seth woke again he heard quiet voices coming from downstairs. Thinking it might be Fee and Kiver returned already he got up and walked carefully down the stairs. As he reached the bottom he realized the voice he heard talking with Rory was male but definitely not Irish. Instead he heard a deep voice with a strong Louisiana drawl. His heart sank. 

Don’t be stupid, Patrick. If Avery were back you’d know it right away.

He was about to go back upstairs and leave them to their conversation when Rory’s voice called out, “Seth? That you?”

Because he couldn’t answer he walked into the kitchen instead.

Seated at the table with Rory was a short, handsome troll with dark indigo skin and an impeccable three-piece suit, though the jacket was draped over a chair. His--Seth assumed he was male--hair fell in thick neat ringlets around his head and he wore what looked like expensive rings on both hands. Seth felt decidedly underdressed in his Bugs Bunny pajama pants.

Every troll Seth had ever met had the same hair color: jet black, though the textures differed widely. But every troll had a different set of horns: always the same gradated sunset colors, bright as a toucan’s bill, but otherwise individual as a fingerprint. Rory’s horns were a bit like a goat’s, curved back from his face but with two different tips, one spit into two. This troll had horns protruding from his forehead and curving in an S shape, giving with the fringey fins of his ears the look of some sea creature. The fringes were torn somewhat and his face was covered in scars.

Rory stood up and pulled out a chair for Seth across from the newcomer. “Hungry?”

Seth sat down, and nodded.

“Seth, meet Magnus Fiynch, my moirail. Magnus, this is Seth.”

Seth and Magnus nodded at each other. Rory smiled a bit and went to the fridge. Seth noticed Magnus’s eyes were almost purple. 

“More soup? Your jaw … “

Seth nodded, and Rory set about heating it up. Seth tried to remember what a moirail was. Something like a spouse but also a best friend, not necessarily a sex partner. Trolls, like Seth himself, seemed to keep sex and love separate.

“He/him,” Magnus drawled. “I’d offer to shake your hand, but.”

Seth held up a wrapped paw ruefully. Pointed at himself to indicate, me too.

Magnus nodded.

Rory set down a hot bowl of soup in front of Seth. “Be careful.”

He went and sat next to Magnus.

“I was just telling Magnus that Fee--Fjordan’s--off looking for your friend.”

Seth nodded, feeling Magnus’s intense gaze upon him and feeling suddenly guilty.

“Fee’s good at finding people,” Rory said, glancing at Magnus, who was looking at him.

Seth looked down at his bowl. He felt like he was intruding on a moment.

“And don’t worry, if there’s any danger that’s why he brought Kiver. Not to mention his Colt .45.”

Seth looked up, nodding. He doubted even most trolls would want to take on Kiver, and something about Fjordan radiated capable confidence. He nodded again, looked down at his soup, glancing at Magnus in his three piece before shrugging and picking up the bowl.

Magnus made no comment.

“So, Magnus came over to invite me out to dinner,” Rory began.

Seth set down the bowl and made shooing motions, like go already.

Rory smiled. “You’ll be OK?”

Seth rolled his one functional eye, nodded. “Go.” The word was difficult.

“OK, give me ten minutes.” Rory ran upstairs.

Magnus smiled softly.

Seth looked at his bowl. It was clear these two loved each other, and it brought a lump to his throat, worrying about Avery.

“Fjordan will find your friend,” Magnus said quietly. “If anyone can, it’s him.”

Seth looked up. Swallowed. Nodded. 

“Can I get you anything? Drink of water?”

Seth nodded again. People in this town were so fucking nice. He wasn’t sure how to deal with not being kicked like an unwanted stray.

Magnus brought him a glass of tap water, which Seth held between his two mittened hands to drink.

Rory came downstairs shortly afterwards, wearing yellow jeans with big pink flowers on them, a white t-shirt and a purple and pink plaid shirt, a big smile on his face. Seth smiled too, then touched his jaw as it protested. 

Magnus stood up, smiling too. Seth noticed he wore custom-made boots that fit him perfectly. “Ready?”

Rory nodded, turning to Seth. “There’s a TV in the living room, feel free to take over the couch and help yourself to whatever you like in the kitchen. Ooh, I have otter pops in the fridge. Those might be soothing.”

Seth hadn’t had otter pops since he was a kid. Frozen tubes of colored liquid of questionable nutritional value, they were great for cooling down crowds of hot thirsty kids. Malcolm’s mother had always had some on hand. He nodded.

“Have fun.” 

“Stop talking, dummy.” Rory said with a smile. “See you later. Oh, one more thing.” He went to the kitchen and dug in the cupboard, took two pills out of a bottle. “Painkillers.” He put them in Seth’s outstretched hand. “Don’t take any more, though. Those aren’t baby aspirin. They oughta help relax your muscles, though, help with the healing process.”

Seth nodded. Waved at them.

Magnus lit a cigarette. He seemed used to Rory’s long goodbyes. “I believe the man is saying we can leave, Rory.”

Rory looked at Seth. “You’ll be OK?”

Seth laughed, made more shooing motions.

Magnus laughed. “Come on.”

They left. 

Seth took the pills and went to sit on the couch. The living room was a friendly jumble that looked like it had been furnished from a thrift store. The television was an older model that still had rabbit ears. Seth had to get up to switch it on, which was awkward with his bandaged hand. He didn’t like television that much but he wasn’t tired enough to sleep. He was able to get two channels: popular cop show and silly sitcom about a black family and their weird neighbor. He initially watched the cop show but the plot centered on a kidnapping so dumb sitcom it was.

He fell asleep a few shows later, curled up under a bright afghan that clashed completely with the goldenrod-flowered couch.

He awoke the next morning to the smell of frying ham and the sound of clinking dishes. He got up and wandered into the kitchen to see Magnus in his shirt sleeves and gray dress slacks, stirring what looked like Hollandaise sauce. He looked up as Seth entered.

“Morning.”

Seth nodded. “Loo?”

Magnus pointed to a back hallway. “Through there.”

“Thanks.” Talking still hurt but not quite as much as yesterday. Seth went and peed, peering at himself in the mirror afterwards. He was barely recognizable. His left eye was still covered by a huge bruise and his jaw on that same side sported a knot the size of a plum. His hair looked OK, thanks to someone having washed it when he was out. He wondered if that had been Rory. He still wore it long; it hung straight to his waist.

He hated interrupting his host’s romantic breakfast but he was starving. He went and rejoined Magnus in the kitchen.

“Coffee?” Magnus asked him. He had plated up three helpings of Eggs Benedict in Seth’s absence.

Seth nodded. “You made me breakfast.” The words came slowly.

“Of course. Cream? Sugar?”

“One sugar.”

Magnus handed him a cup of coffee, which Seth held with two hands again, feeling like a little kid.

“Have a seat.”

“I can eat in the other room.”

“It’s fine, you’re not interrupting anything.” Magnus paused. ‘What I mean is, you’re a guest. It’s fine.”

Seth nodded, took a seat as Rory bounced into the room.

“Ooh, eggs Benedict, you do love me.” He kissed Magnus’s cheek before pouring himself coffee and sat down with his plate.

Magnus smiled and sat down with his breakfast as well.

Seth managed to pick up his fork with his right hand. 

“I’ll look at that after breakfast,” Rory said, indicating the hand. “I can see the bruises are fading on your ribs and eye, that’s good. How’s everything feel?”

“Hand’s stiff. Jaw’s improving. Can talk.”

“So I hear.” he smiled. “I have some patients to see today. I trust you’ll be alright?”

Seth nodded. “Any news?”

Rory shook his head. “I’d have woken you if there was. Sorry.”

Seth nodded again.

Rory patted his hand carefully across the table.

Seth just looked from him to Magnus, then back at his plate. “The food is good, thank you.”

“Glad you like it,” Magnus said after a pause.

Seth could feel them watching him and concentrated on his food, then sighed. He looked up.

“Thank you for everything. I am unaccustomed to such kindness.”

Magnus regarded him for a minute, then nodded.

“Most people here have similar stories,” Rory said, smiling. 

“Where is here?”

“The great metropolis of Mynah’s Creek. Population around 1,000. Best place in the whole damned universe.”

This earned another smile from Magnus.

“My lucky week, then,” Seth said.

“Darn tootin’.”

“I wish I could repay you.”

“No need. If you stick around I’m sure you will someday. And if you don’t, well, your loss but you can help someone else who needs it. That’d be payment enough.”

Seth nodded. “Swamp-ri-la,” he said, quietly.

“Pardon?”

“Nothing. Just …” He shook his head. Pointed to his jaw, which was starting to hurt again. It was a good excuse for not sharing what he was thinking.

“Yeah, sorry, making you talk a lot today.”

Seth shrugged. It hurt a little, which must have shown in his face.

“You’re pushing yourself too much,” Rory said, getting up and going to the cupboard. He brought Seth three pills in a small bowl. “The big one’s a sleeping pill if you’re having problems resting. The other two are the same painkillers you took yesterday. You’re not required to take any of them but I’ll leave them here just in case. You need to take it easy today, preferably lying down. Watch some game shows, sleep if you can. Your body will thank you.”

Seth nodded.

“I will call you if there’s news. There’s a landline in the front hallway with a very loud ring.”

“Thanks.”

“Let me see that right hand.”

Seth showed it to him. Rory made him wiggle his fingers, checked under the bandages a bit. “Looks like you’re healing nicely. We’ve got to go to work now. Your only job is to rest. Don’t get any crazy ideas like washing the dishes with your broken hands.”

Seth saluted him. Rory smiled. Magnus was already rinsing the dishes. He turned off the coffee pot.

“See you tonight,” he said.

Rory nodded. “Have fun at work.”

“Always.” He was buttoning his waistcoat.

“You’ll be OK, then?” This to Seth.

Seth smiled. “Yes.”

“Rest.”

“Go, already.”

Rory and Magnus both laughed. They left. Seth wondered what it was Magnus did for a living. With those fancy suits he was guessing it wasn’t digging ditches.

His ribs hurt more today, which he knew from experience meant they were healing. He took the two painkillers. He didn’t like sleeping pills. What if there was news? He wanted to be able to get to the phone.

He decided to take the doc’s advice and try to rest. If Avery was in trouble he might need him. He lay down on the couch and watched The Price Is Right. Bob Barker was asking Seth how much he would pay for Avery’s life. “Is it 300, 1,000, or 1 million? Answer carefully.” The buzzer sounded. “Oh, sorry, time’s up.” The buzzer sounded again as Seth tried to protest. The game show faded away as a key rattled in the front door lock.

“Hello?” A deep voice called out. “Anyone home?”

Seth sat up carefully, not sure what to do. He thought he should make his presence known but shouting was beyond him. He was spared making a decision as the intruder entered the living room. 

His first thought was, if this guy’s not friendly I’m dead. It was an oliveblood troll, well over six feet tall, with large horns that bent out and then in, like a diamond above his head. He was massive, covered in scars and tattoos, missing several fingers on one hand and half his right ear. One of his front fangs was metal. He wore a t-shirt and cutoff shorts, no shoes. He was carrying an empty cardboard box.

“Oh, hello,” the troll said after a pause. “You must be the young man they found by the gas station. Or I assume man.”

Seth nodded.

“Draygo. He/him.” He held out a hand and then noticed both of Seth’s were bandaged and withdrew it. “Sorry.”

Seth shrugged.

“I’m a friend of Rory’s. Just stopped by to get some supplies for the community center.” He waved the box.

“You work there?”

“Not exactly.” Draygo smiled.

“Uh huh.” Seth didn’t buy this guy’s story, and thought it’d be a poor way to repay Rory by letting him get robbed.

“So, uh, sorry to interrupt your rest. I’ll just get it and go.”

“I don’t think so.”

Draygo looked at him.

“I’m not about to let you just take stuff. You can come back when Rory’s here.”

“What’s your name, son?”

“Seth Patrick.”

Draygo checked his watch, which looked cheap and battered. “Did Rory say when he would be back?”

“No.”

Draygo nodded, pulled out his phone. Punched a number, waited. “Rory. Hey. How’s it going?” He waited. ‘Uh huh. Good. Yeah, good call. Listen, can you reassure Seth that I’m not here to steal your stuff?” Pause. He laughed a little. “Yeah. Thanks.” He handed Seth the phone.

Seth took it carefully with his right hand. “Rory?”

“Yeah. Hi. Did you really just accuse Draygo of being a burglar?” Rory sounded amused.

“Um.”

Rory laughed. “No worries. Thanks for having my back, but he can take what he needs. He and I are old friends.”

“OK. I just--”

“No need to explain. Like I said, I appreciate it.”

“OK.”

“Talk to you soon. Put Draygo back on?”

“Sure.” He handed Draygo the phone. “He wants to talk to you.”

Draygo took the phone. “Yep?” He listened. ‘Right. Good to know. Talk to you later.” He hung up and looked at Seth. “So, want to accompany me to the back hall? Rory tells me that’s where the stuff is.”

“Uh, sure.” Seth stood up, feeling a bit dumb now, and followed him to the hall behind the kitchen where the bathroom was. Draygo opened a door to a large closet. Seth pushed a kitchen chair over to the entrance to the hallway and sat down as Draygo loaded medical supplies into the cardboard box he’d brought.

“Lot of folks go to the community center for minor injuries, poison ivy, stuff like that. The doc’s pretty busy, being the only one in town.”

“Yeah, makes sense.” Seth had no idea where Rory would have gotten his training. As far as he knew trolls weren’t allowed at university. Yet another reason he’d decided to drop out of society in general. “He did a real good job on me.”

“Yeah, you’re looking a lot better than reported.”

“That wouldn’t be hard.”

Draygo laughed. “So you repaid the favor by making sure he didn’t get robbed.”

“Yeah.” Seth felt sheepish. “Sorry about that.”

“No need to be sorry. I was impressed. Not many humans have the balls to stand up to me.”

Seth shrugged. “I made a deal with myself a while ago that I wouldn’t let fear rule my life.”

Draygo turned to look at him, consideringly. “Sometimes fear is the smart response.”

Seth nodded. “And I have run, plenty. Like earlier this week. I just mean there’s a difference between running from a situation you know is going to get you killed and finding out if it will first.”

Draygo laughed. “Good distinction.”

Seth nodded and rubbed his jaw. “Yes.”

“I’m making you talk too much. That looks painful.”

Seth shrugged. “I’ve had worse.” He frowned, thinking of Avery, hoping he was alright.

“I understand you commandeered my investigator to find your friend,” Draygo said, turning back to the boxes. 

“Your--” Seth paused. “He works for you?”

“Yep. Just about everyone does except the human government officials.” Draygo turned back, holding the box. “Draygo Xerxes, town boss, at your service.”

“Oh, shit.” Seth laughed.

Draygo laughed too. “You and your friend decide to stick around, I’d be happy to offer you a job. I like you.”

Seth looked at him. “I, uh, don’t do that well with the nine to five thing.”

Draygo’s laugh turned to a nice warm belly laugh. “Now you sound like Fjordan. No worries. You stick around, I’m sure we’ll find a way to put your skills to use.”

Seth nodded, not sure about this but willing to consider it. 

“I’m gonna get out of your hair for real now,” Draygo said. “Gotta make this delivery before the club opens. When you’re feeling up to it you should come. St. Sedition’s is the place to be most nights.”

“Great name.”

Draygo grinned. “Thanks. Came up with it myself.”

Seth walked him to the door.

“Nice to meet you,” Draygo said.

“You as well.” He waved goodbye and shut the door, wandered to the kitchen and got an otter pop, red, before going to sit on the sofa. He looked around the room. There was a bookshelf with mostly medical reference books but also a couple of novels. Seth picked one up. The title was ridiculously long: _In which our heroine, a goldblood, has too many people who want to be her quadrantmates so she holds a contest but meanwhile one of the suitors is killing off all of the others so two of them band together to find out who and they end up falling in love and ditching the contest to run off and fulfill their lifelong dream of opening a restaurant and never end up solving the mystery so there is a bloody battle and our heroine is left with one flushmate who she decides she doesn’t like. Contains loving descriptions of several deaths and 97 sex scenes. Also one smart rhino and an ongoing gag about a pair of sentient pliers_.

The book was thick and hard to hold with his broken hands. Probably all the sex scenes. Seth put it back. The other book was also a romance but the title simply said _Sex and Death Inside_ and had the virtue of being small enough to handle. Seth settled in with the book, which was far from the worst he’d read, and an otter pop. He fell asleep.

He woke up to the phone ringing in the front hall. He didn’t remember getting to the phone, just suddenly he was there, picking up the olive green receiver. “Hello?”

“Seth?” Avery’s voice broke a bit on the other end. “Oh, god, is that really you?”


	3. Trains Usually Stop First

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If I were seducing you, Grey, you’d know it.”

Chapter Three

June 12, 1989  
A few hours later

“JUMP!” Seth yelled at Avery above the clacking of the train. Avery had hesitated at first and now his friend was getting left further and further behind with every second. 

Avery looked at the speeding ground and fear grabbed him. Jump? Was he nuts? He closed his eyes. His father’s voice came to him, taunting, “Come on you sissy, what’re you afraid of?” He opened his eyes. The ground was moving a bit slower. All right, Avery, just fucking do this.

He couldn’t take a running start because the door wasn’t open that far. He’d be more likely to get stuck or hit the wall. He tried pushing the door open farther, bracing his back and pushing with his legs. It budged a little.

Good enough. Avery hurried to the other side of the boxcar, glanced at the cows, “Wish me luck.” He ran at full speed and leapt into thin air, legs cycling for purchase as he fell, tumbling, down a graveled embankment and into a muddy ditch.

“Ow.” He lay on his back looking up at the afternoon sky. He heard running footsteps and then Seth’s face was peering down at him, grinning.

“Whooooo! You did it.” Seth pumped his fists in the air as Avery sat up, gingerly. “Oh, fuck, your back.”

“My knees.” The knees of his jeans were torn now and bloody scratches showed through.

“Fuck, I’m sorry man, but if you had jumped when I said … “

Avery gave him a look.

“Right, not helping.” Seth offered him a hand. “Can you stand? We oughta go.”

Avery took Seth’s hand and stood up, knees stinging, a metallic taste in his mouth. He felt the corner of his mouth with his hand and winced.

“Yeah, you hit your face a bit, too. Sorry, Avery. Future reference: don’t jump if there’s gravel.”

“Now you tell me.” He looked at his fingers, which had blood on them.

“You OK?”

Avery thought. Sure, his body hurt now but for five seconds he’d been flying, He looked up at his friend’s anxious face and a slow smile spread across his own. “Uh, yeah, I’m awesome! I just jumped off a fucking train.”

Seth’s expression changed from worry to a conspiratorial grin. “Told you it’d make you feel alive.”

“You spoke nothing but truth. Come on, let’s find a place to lie low.”

Seth pointed to the horizon, where they could see the outskirts of a town. “Let’s go.”

As Avery walked each step hurt more and more. He tried to hide it from Seth but it soon became clear he couldn’t keep up. Seth turned around.

“What’s up?”

“I feel something sharp every time I step. Sorry. I mean, I can just walk… “

“Don’t be stupid. It’s probably gravel, digging in. But we won’t know without ripping your pants more or just taking ‘em off.” He set down the suitcase and turned his back to Avery. “Hop up.”

‘You sure?”

“Yeah, I can carry your skinny ass.”

“But--”

“You have to manage the suitcase, though.” 

“OK, fair.” Avery hopped awkwardly onto Seth’s back. 

Seth laughed a little, hiking him up. ‘You haven’t done this much, have you city boy?”

“No.” Avery’s only male friends had been on the sports teams he played on, and while there was horsing around it didn’t involve a lot of touching. “Not beyond a couple of games of chicken. You know, didn’t want to look gaaaay.”

“Ah, macho bullshit strikes again.”

“Pretty much.”

“Hold on tight.” Seth bent down and picked up the suitcase, straightening up before handing it to Avery. As he walked it bumped a little against his chest. Avery tried to avoid this but found he needed to hang on more. Seth didn’t seem to mind: he walked along easily. Avery could feel the sharpness of his bones through his clothing.

“Hey, we’ve got a little money. What d’ya say we treat ourselves to a nice dinner somewhere?”

“Sounds good. First we get you … an ID …. find a place to … stay.” 

“I’ll let you walk.” Avery realized talking and walking while carrying him was asking a lot.

“Thanks.”

Seth carried him to the outskirts of town before setting him down. “Probably best you walk from here.”

Avery nodded. “Thanks.” He took a few gingerly steps. His knees were stiff and painful.

“There’s a motel up ahead,” Seth said. “We could get a room, then I can go out and get a few supplies. It just occurred to me we’re going to need to wait a couple of days to get you an ID.”

Avery looked at him, puzzled.

Seth pointed to his own face. “Your face.”

“Oh, right.”

“Come on, I’ll help you.” Seth took the suitcase back and slid his free shoulder under Avery’s. “I’ll pick the gravel out as soon as I get some first aid supplies. I’m running low. I can get you some jeans too.”

Avery nodded. “OK. Thanks.”

“We should try to save our money but you’re noticeable like this.”

He nodded again. “Yeah, good point.”

There was a bench outside the motel. Seth suggested Avery wait there to avoid questions and was back soon with a key. “Ground floor room, this way.”

They walked around the outside of the motel to their room, which was around the back and near the ice machine. Seth let them in. The smell of stale cigarettes wafted out to meet them. Avery coughed.

Seth laughed. “Yeah, a bit pungent. Well, beggars, choosers. The room was cheap anyway.”

The room featured one bed that sagged visibly, two hard backed chairs and a small table with an ashtray on it, a television on the bureau and a ceiling fan that made clicking noises. The light fixture was hanging askew and was missing one of its bulbs. The entire room was furnished in a sickly shade of mustard, including the carpet.

“Hope it was really cheap,” Avery said.

“It was. Go, sit, let’s get your clothes off so I can see what we’re dealing with.”

Avery felt his ears go red. 

Seth laughed. “You’re adorable.” He helped Avery out of his muddied clothes, leaning in close to help with the shirt. “If I were seducing you, Grey, you’d know it.” 

Avery looked up into Seth’s grey eyes, swallowed, and nodded. Seth kissed him lightly before kneeling down to look at his knees. 

“Yep, embedded gravel. Ouch.” He stood up and checked Avery’s back. “Same back here. OK, try to make yourself comfortable if you can but stay off the bed. I don’t want to have to explain bloodstains and I’m not sure how clean that comforter is anyway.”

Avery nodded. “Right.”

“Hopefully there’s a drugstore nearby and I won’t be long. I’ll get us some food, too.”

“Awesome.” Avery thought he could eat the television at this point.

“Alright, then, sit tight.” Seth opened the suitcase and took out some cash. Turned out the money was hidden in a zipped pocket. He winked at Avery and put his finger to his lips.

Avery laughed and rolled his eyes.

“See you soon.” Seth left. 

Avery got up stiffly, wearing just his underwear now, and found the remote for the television. He sat down again and managed to find some mildly amusing cartoons to watch. He supposed Seth would tease him for acting like a five year old again but Avery found cartoons soothing. They reminded him of a simpler time when he was little and had his parents’ approval.

Great. Now the cartoons were making him sad. He switched over to a game show and wondered where they got people to be on them. Everyone always seemed so fucking excited to win a washer and dryer set. He’d heard you got taxed through the nose on those shows and most people ended up just taking the cash. Ah, the American dream. Gouge people and make them feel like you’re doing them a favor.

He thought about Seth, wondered what his story was. Clearly his family life was on a par with Avery’s or he wouldn’t be here on the road, with him. Maybe his parents were homophobic assholes too. Avery felt a little guilty painting his mom with the same brush as his dad, but the truth was she had checked out of Avery’s life before he was ten in favor of his little sister. They did everything together, a girls’ club that Avery wasn’t invited to join. When he was little he and his mom had been so close. He had trusted her, felt allowed to be himself in her presence, and then one day it had just stopped. He wondered if his father had had something to do with it, but that didn’t make him forgive his mom. She should have been there for him, and she wasn’t, so he could only assume it was by choice.

And fuck. This is cheerful. Think about something else. Anything else. The way Seth’s body felt against yours … fuck, no, dangerous topic. Last thing you need is for him to come in when you’re sporting a boner. Down, boy. Think about golf. He started laughing. God, he was pathetic.

He switched over to a soap opera and amused himself by giving advice to the characters until Seth got back. “Dump his ass, Sharon, he's a fucking liar.”

The door opened and Seth came in, laden with bags and two large drinks with straws. Avery went to help. 

“Got us sandwiches. Hope you like Italian.” Seth tossed him a wrapped bundle. 

“At this point I’d eat Italian shoes.” Avery unwrapped the sandwich and took one of the sodas to the table with him.

Seth laughed as he joined him. “God, me too.”

They sat and ate for a while. Avery noticed, not for the first time, how good food tasted now that he didn’t get it all the time. Seth had bought cookies and chips as well, so he actually felt full.

“Ohmygod,” he said with his mouth full of cookie, “I love you.”

“Yeah, hold onto that when I’m picking gravel out of you. Ready?”

Avery finished the cookie and nodded glumly. “Might as well get it over with, yeah.”

“Let’s do this in the bathroom.” Seth dug in the packages and pulled out a bag with a pharmacy logo.

Avery sat on the edge of the tub, still in his underwear, and tried not to wince every time Seth pulled out yet another piece of gravel with the tweezers he’d bought. He did his back first and then knelt in front of him to get the knees, which were a lot more painful.

The last piece was embedded pretty deep. Seth looked at Avery apologetically. “I’m sorry.”

“Just do it.”

“You sure?”

Avery nodded. Seth had to move the tweezers around to get a grip on the chunk of rock, and when he pulled it out Avery’s knees were bleeding freely and it was all he could do not to cry.

“Poor baby,” Seth said, coming up to kiss him. Avery kissed him back, knees forgotten, one on each side of Seth as he pulled him closer. Seth’s hand wandered to the front of Avery’s briefs, and--

“Oh, shit.” Avery was mortified.

Seth smiled at him. “Happens to everyone.” He kissed him lightly. “You should take a shower, wash off the blood. Make sure your wounds are clean and then I’ll put some Bactine on it. I’ll give you some privacy.” He left the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Avery could tell his face was red as a beet and was grateful to Seth for leaving him alone. Well, that was sexy, Grey. He stood up carefully, stepped out of his briefs and into the shower. The hot water stung his scratches. The door opened briefly after a few minutes.

“Just me, bought you some things.” Seth left again.

Avery was touched when, stepping out of the shower, he saw what Seth had left for him, piled neatly on the seat. A pack of underwear, deodorant, toothbrush and paste, razor. He didn’t have to shave very often but he was looking a little scraggly. 

After a couple of days of not having a toothbrush brushing his teeth felt very satisfying. He shaved, applied the deodorant, and put on a pair of briefs before emerging from the bathroom. 

“Thank you,” he said. “That was really nice.”

“I bought you some jeans, too.” Seth pointed to the bed, “but we need to finish treating your injuries first. Ready?”

A few minutes later Avery’s wounds were stinging with antibacterial spray and his knees were freshly bandaged. Seth suggested he wait to get dressed until they had to go somewhere to give his injuries a little air. Avery felt sufficiently recovered from his mortification to joke that Seth just wanted to see him naked.

“Maybe,” Seth said, with a smile.

“I think I just want to relax for a bit, see what’s on TV.”

“Works for me.”

They lounged on the bed watching the evening news.

“I really hate newscasters,” Seth said. “They’re just so fake.”

“We can watch something else.”

“Nah, it’s smart to stay informed. I mean, to be fair, it must suck to talk about other people’s misfortunes all the time. Just, lay off the stupid jokes.”

Avery snorted. “Yeah, ouch, that one was just painful.”

“Yeah.” Seth looked at him. “Speaking of ouch, how are your knees?”

“They’ve felt worse,” Avery said with a shrug. He’d once gotten tackled hard from behind, resulting in field burn so bad that he was in pain for a week. Not to mention all the times he’d fallen from his skateboard. “But they don’t feel great.”

“I got you some painkillers,” Seth said, hopping up. “Want a couple?”

“Yeah, that’d be great.”

Seth brought him two pills and some water before settling back down on the bed. Avery took the pills and set the glass down on the nightstand. 

“So, what kind of dangerous life were you living before I met you, anyway?” Seth asked.

Avery smiled. “You get to be mysterious, I can too.”

Seth laughed and put his arm around him. “Fair enough.”

Avery leaned against him. The show changed to Wheel of Fortune. 

“Oh my god this guy’s so dumb,” Avery said after they’d watched for a while.

“Yes, the answer is clearly Suck my dick, Pat.”

Avery started giggling. He could feel Seth laughing too. They watched the rest of the show--the dumb guy lost. Avery started feeling drowsy, the adrenaline rush from the afternoon’s events wearing off and the pain meds kicking in. He fell asleep halfway through Super Jeopardy and woke up a while later to see Seth lounged next to him, head raised on one hand.

“Hey.” 

“Hey.”

Seth leaned in and kissed Avery’s chest. Avery put his hand on his face and pulled him in for a kiss.

“Sorry I fell asleep.”

“Sokay,” Seth said, yawning. “So did I. It’s been a busy day.”

“What time is it?”

“Does it matter?” Seth smiled at him and kissed him again.

“Uh, no, I guess not.”

They kissed for a while, Seth lying half on top of Avery.

“I’m gonna put my hand there again. Is that OK?”

Avery nodded.

“We can go as slow as you like.”

“I don’t want to.” Avery kissed him harder. “Go slow,” he added, just to be clear.

Seth smiled into the kiss. “I gathered.”

He slid his hand carefully inside Avery’s briefs, causing him to arch his back. Avery kicked them off and reached for the buckle of Seth’s pants. Soon they were both naked. Seth guided Avery’s hand between his own legs and their eyes met as they brought each other to climax. 

Seth kissed Avery tenderly before laying down beside him. “Now that was nice.”

Avery couldn’t speak. He just had a stupid grin on his face. Seth looked at him and laughed.

Avery gave him the side-eye. “You think I’m a huge dork.” 

Seth nodded. “I honestly wouldn’t want you any other way.”

Avery looked at him, not sure exactly what he was feeling but liking it. He kissed Seth again. They screwed around some more before they both fell asleep.

When Avery woke up he was starving. He and Seth were sprawled across each other in a tangle of legs. “Seth.”

“Hmm?”

“You hungry?”

“Ravenous. Let’s get dressed and go see who sells a decent steak in this town.”

It turned out that the place to go, according to three randomly polled citizens of wherethefucckareweanyway was a steak house called Joe’s. It was 8pm and the sun was setting. Avery wore his new jeans, one of Seth’s t-shirts and the blazer from the linen suit, along with Seth’s dress shoes. Seth wore grey slacks and a pink silk shirt and tie with his canvas dockers. Together, Seth had reasoned, they were in one entire dressed-up outfit.

“I can’t believe you asked people.”

Seth shrugged. “The secret to not being noticed, sometimes, is acting like you fit in. Skulking will definitely trigger alarms. Friendly questions, on the other hand... .”

Avery nodded.

“Course it only works if you’re not black, Mexican, or a troll because the world is fucked,” Seth added. 

Avery looked at him. “Don’t forget gay.”

“Yes, but we’re not wearing our I’m a homo buttons and straight is presumed. I’m just saying, it’s a rigged system.”

“Yeah,” Avery said. “Yeah, it is.” He’d never given it a ton of thought. He’d had black friends at school who were good at sports so the rest of the school treated all of them like gods. They hadn’t hung out afterwards much, though to be fair, Avery didn’t hang out with anyone from his team much. It was too stressful pretending to be someone he wasn’t. He knew some of the other black kids at school didn’t have it so easy but, hey, the world wasn’t fair, right? He felt bad, and a little hypocritical, now realizing how much he’d just accepted things the way they were.

The restaurant wasn’t far. They got a booth in a corner as the place was only moderately busy. They ordered quickly: steak was what they were there for. Big, juicy steaks, salad, baked potatoes, and nonalcoholic drinks in deference to Avery’s lack of ID. He thought it was nice of Seth to abstain as well. Avery got a rootbeer, earning a small smile from Seth. Seth got ice tea.

“I never really thought about it,” Avery admitted once the waitress had left their drinks. “How unequal things are. I mean, other than in civil rights class and that seemed, I dunno, like it didn’t have much to do with me.”

Seth nodded. “Yeah, most white kids don’t. They might feel bad but think there’s nothing they can do, or they don’t actually know any non-whites or trolls or you know, they do but they don’t see them as oppressed.”

“How about you?”

Seth shrugged, stirred his tea. “My mother raised me different.” He took a sip. “She was part of the civil rights movement. Marched with Dr. King. Left home as soon as she could and joined a commune.”

Avery gaped at him. “Wow.”

“Yeah. She never was exactly sure who my father was.” He smiled. “She said it didn’t matter, the commune was love.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah, sounds like bullshit to me too but she believed it and I believed in her. She was amazing.”

“Was?”

“She died.” Seth’s face darkened. He drank his tea and didn’t elaborate.

“I’m sorry. That really sucks.”

“Yeah.” Seth looked down, then back up at Avery. “She sewed our clothes when I was little, and baked the world’s best bread and there were flowers just, everywhere. She grew them in our garden and decorated the house with them, painted pictures of them.” 

Avery smiled. “How old were you when she … “

“She got sick when I was seven and we moved back to her family home. She didn’t have a lot of choices. I soon figured out why she’d left.” He shredded the paper from his straw, talked to it instead of to Avery directly. “My grandmother thought my mom’s cancer was a punishment from God for betraying the family. And my grandfather … “ Seth laughed bitterly. “My grandfather is everything my mother wasn’t. He and I … don’t get along.”

Avery nodded, put his hand on Seth’s. Seth flinched a little but didn’t pull away. He squeezed it before letting go. He took a breath. “My mom stopped paying attention to me when I was seven.”

Seth looked up.

“One day she was my best friend and the next … it was tea parties and American Girls with my little sister and I was encouraged to go play sports. Given excuses for why I couldn’t go shopping with her anymore or watch her put on her makeup or act out stories with her until I just stopped asking. I can only assume,” he said, looking at the table, “that my father told her she was making me into a sissy but the thing is … “ he choked back tears. “The thing is, she didn’t have to listen.”

When he looked up Seth was looking at him. He raised a toast. “To shitty parental figures.”

Avery toasted him back glumly. “Cheers.”

“May they rot in hell,” Seth said, drinking his down.

Avery wasn’t sure his mom deserved hell, exactly, but then he was pretty sure it didn't exist anyway. So all he said was. “I guess.”

They were quiet until the waitress brought their steaks and ate in silence for a while since they were both hungry.

“You have a right to be angry at your mom. That was a horrible thing she did to you.” Seth said a while later.

Avery looked at him. “How do you always seem to know what I’m thinking?”

Seth shrugged. “I’m good at reading people. The thing is, she chose peace in her marriage over you.”

Avery put down his fork. “Please stop.” It was all he could do not to cry. He looked at the table and tried to school his face.

“Of course, I’m sorry. I just … it’s OK to own your anger. She betrayed you.”

Avery nodded.

“I’ll stop. I’m sorry.”

He nodded again, sobbed quietly.

Seth swore under his breath and came around to Avery’s side of the table. Put his arms around him, kissed the top of his head. He held him until Avery stopped crying. 

“My brother’s very upset about the death of our dog,” he heard Seth tell someone.

“Oh, my gosh, I’m so sorry to hear that. My condolences,” said a female voice.

“Thanks.”

“Would you like me to clear your plates?”

“Please.”

“Would--dessert help?”

“I don’t know. Avery, would dessert help?”

Avery shrugged, then nodded.

“You want a fucking brownie sundae don’t you.”

Avery nodded again.

“One sundae two coffees, please.”

“Right away. So sorry about your dog.” She left.

“Feeling better?” Seth asked Avery. 

Avery nodded. 

“I’d better go back to my side of the table so we don’t get stoned to death.”

Avery nodded again, looked up. “Yeah.”

Seth went and sat on his side of the table again.

“I’ve never told anyone that story,” Seth said after a bit. “About my family I mean. At least not since I was a kid.”

“Thank you for trusting me with it.”

Seth nodded. 

Avery tried to think of something less upsetting to talk about. “So, do you think it exists?” he asked finally.

“Think what exists?”

“A town in the bayou where no one gives a fuck what you do or where you came from. But where they, you know, don’t want to kill you either. Live and let live kind of place. With hot guys and something to do once in a while.”

Seth smiled at that last part. “I mean, the world’s a big place. Who’s to say?”

“Like Shangri-la, only … in the swamp,” Avery said. “Swamp-ri La.”

Seth laughed. “We can only hope.”


	4. Baton Rouge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If you’re such a good thief why are you sleeping in an alley?”

Chapter Four

1993, two days earlier  
Baton Rouge

Avery watched Seth leave the gambling club and waited the agreed-upon amount of time before asking the waiter for his bill and settling up for his drinks. He adjusted the buttons on his blazer as he stood and headed for the door.

Outside it was a balmy night and Avery was about to hail a cab when a man approached him. Avery automatically turned sideways to get both men in view: it was rare that thugs traveled alone. Sure enough, now he was looking at two hulking humans in ill-fitting suits.

“Where’s your partner?” one of them asked, briefly showing Avery the gun in his hand, hidden from view in his large jacket pocket.

“Pardon?” Avery’s heart was suddenly racing with adrenaline but his voice stayed reasonably steady.

“Your partner. You have one chance to come clean here, kid. Tell us where he is.”

Avery looked around. “I was just asking myself the same question. We were supposed to meet out here, and the bastard left. With my share of the money, too. Fucking asshole. Knew I shouldn’t have trusted him.” He paced back and forth, grabbing at his hair a little. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” He stamped his foot. A couple of passersby looked at him curiously before continuing on their way.

“Calm down. We don’t want a scene.”

A scene, on the other hand, was exactly what Avery wanted. “Calm DOWN? He gets away with the money and I’m stuck answering your questions and you expect me to be calm?”

“Where is he, kid.”

“I don’t fucking know, all right? But my guess is he’s gone back to our hotel to get some things before he splits town. The Wiltshire, Room 222.” This was the truth. Avery knew he was taking an awful gamble with Seth’s life but lying would be taking a worse one with his. Seth had told him from the beginning that if a situation like this arose he should betray him without a second thought. He was having them of course, but it was still possible they could both get out of this without getting shot. “Good luck finding the fucker. I hope you give him what he has coming to him.”

“What name is the room under?” The man took out his phone.

“Uh, Jack Anderson.” This was also the truth.

The other man called the hotel and asked politely if a Jack Anderson was registered there, and if he could have the room number, as they were supposed to meet and Jack hadn’t answered his calls.

“It checks out,” he said, after thanking the clerk and hanging up. “What do we do with him?” He looked nervously up and down the relatively busy street.

“Give me your phone,” the first man said to Avery.

“My phone?”

The man held out an impatient hand. “I could just shoot you.”

Avery handed over his phone.

“And your wallet.”

“Fuck.” Avery did.

“There. Now you can’t catch a cab there, either. Room key. Car keys.”

Avery very reluctantly gave him the room key, hoping he hadn’t just signed Seth’s death warrant. “I don’t have a car.”

“We see you in our establishment again, they won’t find your body. Have a nice night.” The men hopped into a black town car and sped off.

Avery wasn’t sure what to do. The hotel was a long walk away, but on the off chance Seth needed him he decided to go there. Maybe Seth would circle back, if he could. The thugs had a key so the room wasn’t safe to stay in but it was a starting point, anyway. His mouth was dry and his gut churned. Please don’t end up dead, Seth. He wasn’t sure what he’d do without him in his life, let alone live with the fact that he’d contributed to his death. 

He sped up his pace. He didn’t care about his wallet. His ID was fake and the credit cards weren’t his. He’d had around $1,000 on him but in this new life money was meaningless except for what it could buy, and he could always get more. The only thing he gave a damn about was his boyfriend. He broke into a run.

He slowed when he reached the road the hotel was on. He heard the radio chatter and saw the reflected lights as he came up the street, and slipped out of sight to watch the cops talking with the hotel clerk. There was no ambulance, thank God, and they didn’t appear to have anyone in custody. At least Seth had made it out of the hotel, but that didn’t mean he’d been alone. He turned and walked away. 

He heard running footsteps behind him and didn’t bother to wait to see whose. He took off running at full speed, dodging through a couple of alleys in case they had guns. He hit a dead end and opened a door near a dumpster, dashing past startled kitchen workers and out into the front room of a Chinese restaurant. He was out on the street before anyone could protest. He looked left and right. Right looked more populated so he headed that way, still sprinting. All those years of sports were really paying off these days. If he ran at full speed he was very hard to catch, and four years of walking most places had given him a lot of stamina.

He dodged around a few pedestrians and ducked into a crowded nightclub.

“Five dollar cover,” the guy at the door said.

“Fuck.” Avery stuck his head back out the door. Up the street was a slow moving black town car. He ducked in quickly and looked at the guy again. He was styled to the nines, with pink hair. “I just need to get away from some homophobic assholes who want to hurt me,” he said. “I lost my wallet trying to get away from them.”

The other guy looked him over now, taking in the tailored suit, pink shirt, nice watch, earring, and expensive haircut. “Back door’s past the restroom signs, honey. Good luck.”

“Bless you.” Avery blew him a kiss and ran for it, past people dancing, down a dark back hallway and back out into the night.

He wandered for a while after that, losing his tail and getting lost himself in the process, until he found himself in a less savory part of town. It was late and most stores were closed, save the occasional gas station or 24-hour mart. He was hungry, thirsty and tired but mostly worried about Seth. He had no way to contact him. He had tried making a collect call from a phone booth but no one picked up. His feet hurt like hell in his nice leather shoes. They were meant for looking good, not hiking. They’d had some money a while back and Seth had insisted they treat themselves to good clothes. Looking the part was half the battle.

They were soon broke again, of course. Things just seemed to happen to the two of them. Their latest dip in fortune had been at the hands of a more experienced con artist who watched them win and then just waited for them to walk past, convincing them at gunpoint to hand it all over. Seth said scornfully afterwards that the man had no love for the game. He was just a common thief where they were artists. “His greed will be his undoing. Love for money is the root of many a downfall.”

“Maybe, but he still has our cash,” Avery said.

Seth gave him a look.

Avery held up his hands. “Just saying.”

They’d come to Baton Rouge to work the illegal gambling clubs. Tonight’s game had been risky: high stakes poker. Avery could see the hands of two of Seth’s table mates from his position at the bar and Seth could see what Avery was drinking. Different drinks reflected different hands. Not every hand, just the crucial ones. Straight whiskey meant the hand was good. A mixed drink meant it wasn’t. Drinking with his left hand meant the guy furthest to Seth’s left. Avery had perfected the art of pretending to drink more than he really was, so to all appearances he was just a guy at the bar drowning his sorrows.

Unfortunately, it seemed they had been made and now it seemed Avery was going to have to find a nice warm alley to sleep in in his thousand dollar suit and Italian shoes. He crouched down in an alley to rest, his face in his hands and after a while became aware of whispered voices nearby.

“I say we just pop ‘em,” said the first voice, which was high-pitched with a slight speech impediment, as if the speaker’s mouth was full of marshmallows.

“No one’s getting popped,” said another high-pitched voice. 

“We should tie him up,” said a third, the highest of all. “I brought my jump rope n’ everything. Tie ‘em up and take what we want.”

Wait. Were a bunch of ten year olds seriously considering holding up a business?

“I say just use the guun,” said Marshmallows.

Avery stood up and walked around the corner. “Hold on. No guns. That’s a terrible idea.”

Three troll children looked up at him and screamed in unison. There was a large tubby bronzeblood with curly horns that stuck out from his head like macaroni, in a too-small white T-shirt with a frog on it and drawstring purple sweatpants, a tiny goldblood with sharp-looking horns that stood up straight from her head, wearing a yellow dress and holding a jump rope with plastic tassels on the end, and another bronzeblood that seemed to be about as wide as they were tall, which wasn’t very, with bull-like horns, who was wearing a grey T-shirt that said 5K milk run and cutoff jeans shorts. All three looked dirty, their hair unkempt.

The tiny one kicked Avery in the shins. 

“Ow.” Her claws poked at him through his pants. He hopped on one foot for a second as the kids turned to run off. “Wait,” he said. “I want to make a deal with you.”

They stopped and looked at each other doubtfully.

“I can help you get whatever it is you’re trying to steal if you can give me a place to sleep that’s more comfortable than that alley over there.”

“If you’re such a good thief why are you sleeping in an alley?” 5K asked.

“That’s a good question,” Yellow Dress said.

“Sometimes crime pays, sometimes someone bigger and meaner with a gun comes along.”

“See? Gun,” said Frog Shirt.

“Do you even know how to shoot a gun?” Avery asked.

“You just point it and blam blam!”

“No, you don’t. And if you three try to hold up a store with a gun you’re all going to end up dead.” Trolls, even children, were not treated well by the police in Avery’s experience.

“You gotta better idea, Mister?” 5K again.

“As a matter of fact, I do. Let me handle it.”

The kids huddled for a minute before breaking apart and looking at Avery solemnly. “Deal,” said 5K.

“But you have to get us the good stuff, see?” said Marshmallow.

Avery suppressed a smile. “Tell me what you want me to get.”

The kids conferred and recited a list of food that included sugary breakfast cereal, candy bars, and beef jerky, among similar items.

Avery raised an eyebrow. “How do we feel about peanut butter and bread? Maybe some fruit?”

“They’re OK, too.”

“Great. You kids wouldn’t happen to have five bucks, would you?”

“If we had that kind of money we’d just buy the fucking food,” 5K scoffed.

“Right. Good point. OK.”

“I’ve got a dollar fifty seven,” Yellow Dress volunteered.

“Perfect. You give me that and I’ll get you your food.”

She held it out reluctantly. “You’d better.”

Avery took the money. “Wait here and I’ll be back with everything you want. Stay out of sight. You can see the store. I won’t run off.”

Yellow Dress nodded slowly. “OK, then.”

Avery ambled down the street and walked into the convenience store. He bought a pack of cheap cigarettes for $1.45 and walked outside. Down the street a beer sign flickered on and off. Avery walked to the bar and leaned against the wall near the door, and waited.

After a few minutes a couple of drunk guys stumbled out. 

“Hey, mister, you gotta light?” Avery asked.

“Sure, buddy,” the guy said, “If you suck my dick first. You look like a cocksucker.” He laughed so hard he almost fell over. Avery steadied him and at the same time helped himself to his wallet.

“Al, you’re drunk. Sorry about that, man,” said Al’s friend. “Come on Al, you want your dick sucked so bad we’ll get you a boyfriend.”

Avery laughed and waited for them to leave before checking the contents of the wallet. Al had thirty dollars, which Avery pocketed, and a credit card, which he did not. He dropped the wallet next to the steps leading up to the bar.

A few minutes later another man emerged.

“You gotta light?” Avery asked.

“Go fuck yourself,” the guy said, speech blurred, and stumbled off. Avery saw his wallet peeking out of his back jeans pocket and watched him weave to his car. He fumbled with his keys, swearing as he dropped them on the ground, and bent over to get them.

Avery slipped up behind him and took the wallet. Seth had taught him how to do it without alerting the mark, not that this guy was about to notice much. He took out the man’s credit card and slipped the wallet back before sliding into a nearby alley. The man retrieved his keys, managed to open the car door, and promptly passed out on the horn, which blared loudly. Avery hightailed it out of there as the door to the bar opened again, slowing to a walk once he was a block or two away.

He returned to the convenience store and bought the kids two large bags of groceries with the credit card.

“Oooh, that’s a lot of food,” Yellow Dress said, eyes big, when he rejoined them.

“I can carry it,” said Frog Shirt.

“Nice try,” Avery said. “You can have this when we get to your hideout.”

“This way,” said 5K after a pause.

The kids’ lair turned out to be in the basement of a badly lit building, a moldy room that looked like it might have once been a utility closet. It was painted an ugly shade of green, with a fluorescent lamp hanging by one end, the other swinging. There was a big pile of bedding of questionable cleanliness, a folding table, and one chair.

The kids sat on the floor and looked at Avery expectantly. He set the bags on the table and dug around, tossing each of them a deli sandwich. He’d bought one for himself as well. “Hold on--take the wrapper off first, kid.”

The kids were ravenous. Sandwiches were followed by bananas, chips, and prepackaged fruit pies.

“Ohhh yeaaah,” said Marshmallow Frog Shirt when the pies came out.

Avery chuckled. “So you kids got names?”

“What’s yours?” Yellow Dress demanded, mouth full of pie.

“Avery.”

“Sounds like a troll name,” 5K said.

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

5K nodded. “Fuck, yeah it is. I’m RZ. Undecided. That’s Rabbit in the dress.”

“She/her,” Rabbit said, mouth still full.

“I’m Dodge Powerwagon,” said Marshmallow Frog Shirt. “Gangster.”

“Gangster.” Avery managed not to smile too wide.

“Yeah, see? My gender is gangster.”

“Good choice.”

“You bet your ass, softskin.”

Avery laughed.

“I gotta pee, be right back,” Rabbit said.

“You have a bathroom?” Avery asked.

“Yeah, there’s a toilet in a room down the hall,” RZ said. “You can use it next if you wanna.”

“Maybe later.”

“Suit yourself.” RZ flopped down on the pile of bedding. “How did you steal two whole bags of groceries anyway?”

“I didn’t. I stole a guy’s credit card and used that to buy them.”

“Whoah, that’s using yer noggin,” Dodge Powerwagon said approvingly.

“Can you teach me?” RZ sat up again, looking interested.

“I can try. But not tonight, it’s late.”

Dodge yawned. “Yeah.”

Rabbit came back and Dodge went to use the toilet.

“What were you doing hiding in the dark, anyway?” RZ asked, looking at Avery curiously.

“Someone was after me.”

“Why?” Rabbit asked, flopping down next to RZ.

“They didn’t like that we won a bunch of money and they wanted it back.”

“Didja cheat?” RZ asked.

Dodge came back. 

Avery looked at the kids and decided he wasn’t going to bullshit them. “Yeah, we cheated.”

“Who’s we?” Dodge asked, also lying down on the pile.

“My partner and me.”

“Where’s your partner?” Rabbit asked.

Avery looked at his hands.”I don’t know.”

“Are you sad?” Rabbit asked.

Avery looked up. “Yeah. I’m worried about him.”

“Maybe we can help you find him tomorrow,” RZ said, yawning now. “Have a look around.”

Avery doubted they could help but he nodded. “Maybe so.” He stood up and took off his jacket and tie and nice silk shirt and hung them carefully on the chair. Took off his shoes and socks too and lined them up neatly. Doing so reminded him of that first night with Seth and he suddenly felt like crying. He sniffed.

“You crying?” Dodge asked.

“No. Just … he’s my best friend and he’s missing and some bad people are after us.”

Dodge got up and patted his shoulder. “Don’t worry. We’ll find him for you.”

Avery looked at him, touched. ‘Thanks.”

“Come sleep on the pile,” RZ said, scooting over. “There’s room.”

Avery did. It was surprisingly comfortable. He did his best not to think about things like fleas or bedbugs. 

He was asleep almost at once.

The next morning after a breakfast of dry sugary cereal the kids offered to go look for Seth.

“You stay here, though, out of sight like,” Dodge said.

“I can’t. I can’t just sit here.”

“OK. You go with Dodge, then, and Rabbit and I will be a team. We’ll cover more ground that way,” RZ said. “Dodge knows his way around town in case you see some bad guys.”

“We can just shoot ‘em. Blam, blam,” Dodge said.

“No guns,” Avery said.

“Awwww man. What kind of a gangster doesn’t use a gun?” Dodge asked.

“I don’t.”

“You’re not a gangster, you’re a card sharp,” Rabbit said.

“True, but guns are just asking for trouble.”

“Fiiiiine,” Dodge said.

“Leave the gun here.”

“Fiiiiiine.”

Avery finished getting dressed. “Let’s go.”

They spent a long fruitless day avoiding imaginary bad guys Dodge swore were real, and looking for Seth, who was nowhere in sight. They returned to the lair hot, sweaty, and tired and carrying calzones and root beers Avery bought for them with some of the cash he’d stolen. The kids were happy for the food and Avery did his best to hide how worried he was.

After dinner RZ insisted on being shown how to pick a pocket so they practiced for a while, using Dodge as the mark, the stolen credit card in his back pocket. Avery figured the card was worthless by now: the drunk guy would have noticed it was missing and probably cancelled it, which meant it was dangerous to use as anything other than a training tool.

Rabbit got bored and wanted to have a go at it and turned out to be a much quicker study. By the end of the evening she managed to get the card without Dodge noticing. By then the kids were all sleepy and Dodge was cranky about not getting to learn too so they called it a night.

Avery had restless dreams about Seth’s ghost rising from the swamp and accusing him of giving up the search. He got up early and used the loo, then paced the hallway outside, thinking, not wanting to wake the kids. When he returned to the room they were just waking up.

“Is there anything else we can do to look for him?” he asked RZ.

The kids exchanged glances. “Well, we could ask around the network, but you can’t come.”

“Why not?”

“It’s a kids’ network. No adults. That’s the code.”

“How old are you anyway?” Rabbit asked.

“Twenty-one.”

“That’s old.”

“Twenty-one is not old.”

“That’s three times as old as me,” she said.

“OK, you got me on that one.”

“So do you want us to ask around?”

“Yes, please.”

“We’ll need a little money.”

Avery handed RZ a twenty. “That’s all I have right now.”

“OK, we’ll go ask around.”

“Thanks. I’m going to try to get more money. Meet back here this afternoon?”

They nodded.

Avery walked to the waterfront and picked the pockets of a tourist or two before heading back to the lair around one. He supposed now that he was of age he could try to get a real job but he had no education to speak of and the truth was he liked his life the way it was, though right now he wished Seth were at his side. Please don’t be dead, he thought, as he walked down the stairs.

He heard an argument coming from the lair, the kids and a man’s voice. The man sounded irritated. Avery looked around for a weapon and found none so he took off his shoe and burst through the door.

All heads turned to Avery. There was a punk rocker tied to the chair with Rabbit’s jump rope, looking exasperated as Dodge pointed a gun at him. 

“Avery Grey?” the man asked in a thick Irish accent.

“Who wants to--” Avery never got to finish that sentence. One minute he was standing, the next he was on the other side of the room with a very large object on top of him. He couldn’t see what but it was heavy and felt alive. The kids were screaming.

“Kiver!” The man tied to the chair shouted. “Let him go. That’s the man Seth asked us to find.”

The large object got off of Avery. He rolled over and saw it was the tallest troll he’d ever met, including the pit bosses in Vegas. Behind the troll, who was dressed in a halter top and skimpy shorts, the kids were floating in mid-air, surrounded by a green pulsing energy, still screaming. Dodge Powerwagon still had the gun.

“And disarm that child before he shoots someone,” the punk rocker said.

The gun flew from Dodge’s hand, also surrounded by green light. Kiver caught it.

“Kids, we mean you no harm,” the man shouted. “Please stop screaming. Do you mind untying me?” the man asked Avery.

“Who the hell are you?” Avery shouted.

“Name’s Fjordan O’Malley. Seth asked us to find you. If you untie me I’ll let you use my phone. You can talk to him yourself.”

“Why are they floating? What the fuck is going on?”

“You going to untie me?” 

Avery thought about it. The gambling club hadn’t seemed to have any trolls in its employ and anyway he realized that if the twelve foot tall lady who apparently was making three children and a gun float in midair wanted to hurt him she would have done so by now. He nodded. “It’s OK, kids, calm down.”

The screaming subsided.

“You can set the kids down,” Fjordan said, and Kiver lowered them gently. They skittered to the corner.

Avery untied Fjordan, who handed him a phone. “Call the number for Rory’s landline,” he said. “Seth is staying with him. He lost his phone.”

Avery dialed the number. It rang twice before someone picked up.

“Hello?” Seth’s voice sounded a little funny but Avery knew it immediately.

“Seth?” His voice broke. “Oh, god, is that really you?”

“Yes.”

“Your voice sounds funny,” he said.

“Got punched.”

“You OK?”

“Much … better now.”

Fjordan said, “We can take you to him. And your posse if they want to come.”

“Can I trust this guy?” Avery asked Seth.

“Yes. See you soon.”

“Bye.” Avery hung up the phone and handed it to Fjordan. He swallowed hard. “Thank you.”

Fjordan nodded. “He got beat up pretty bad but Rory fixed him up. He’s going to be fine.”

Avery nodded, biting his lip, trying not to cry in front of the punk rocker, who standing came up to his nose, not counting the four-inch mohawk.

Fjordan turned to the kids. “So, Kiver and I live in a troll town. There are lots of kids. You could have a nicer place to stay, plenty to eat, and adults who actually care what happens to you making sure you’re safe. There’s a town doctor if you get hurt and lots of stuff to do.”

Kiver nodded emphatically. Avery looked at her and did a double-take. She had two tails and six horns. Plus, of course, the floating thing. Clearly not your average troll in any way. 

The kids looked at each other, and then at Avery. 

Avery said, “I think you should come. If anyone tries to hurt you they’ll have to answer to me. Anyway, can’t be worse than here.”

“If it’s a troll town how come you live there?” RZ asked Fjordan.

“It’s not just trolls, but trolls run it. And the humans that live there like that just fine.”

RZ looked at Rabbit, who nodded, and then at Dodge, who narrowed his eyes but nodded too after a bit.

“Can we take our pile?” Rabbit asked timidly.

As answer, Kiver lifted the entire thing in the air with her green energy.

Rabbit’s eyes got very big. 

“Aren’t you afraid of being noticed?” Avery asked, picking up his shoe and sitting down to put it back on before standing up again and picking up the groceries. His body felt a little stiff from being hurled to the floor but he didn’t care. He was going to see Seth soon.

“Nope,” Kiver said in a deep southern drawl. 

He nodded.

“My car’s outside,” Fjordan said. 

They all headed out, the kids and Fjordan first, followed by Avery and then Kiver and the floating pile of bedding.

“You talk funny,’ Dodge told Fjordan.

“This from a kid who channels Edward G. Robinson,” Fjordan scoffed.


	5. Phosphates and Penny Candy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That smile is going to be my undoing,” Seth said quietly in his ear.

Chapter Five

June 1989

The next few days passed in an idyllic haze. They had to wait for Avery’s face to mend enough to take a picture for his fake ID. Seth had found a photobooth at a drugstore that still sold phosphates and penny candy. He brought Avery a handful of candies because for the first couple days at least Avery’s knees hurt too much walk far. He’d woken up the next morning feeling stiff and a little nauseous, which Seth assured him was normal.

“You’ll feel better soon, and in the meantime we’ve got money, this town may be boring but it’s cheap and so far no one seems to have noticed us. There are definitely worse places to hide out.” He grinned at him slyly. “And I’m sure I can find ways to distract you while we wait for your knees to heal.”

Seth had a way of not making Avery feel awkward about his lack of experience. Avery learned that sex could be funny as well as intense and that making Seth feel good was just as satisfying as his own release. They didn’t just have sex of course, though there was plenty of that. Seth also started teaching Avery how to successfully pick a pocket and a lock. He wasn’t very good at either at first but Seth assured him he just needed practice.

“How did you learn?”

“I hung a coat on a coat rack with a bell in the pocket and practiced removing my wallet until the bell didn’t jingle. For the lock I bought a doorknob and some paper clips from a hardware store. The thing with locks is there are so many different kinds. But I figured knowing a basic door lock was a good start.”

“Can you do any other kinds?”

“Not yet, no. Combination locks, safe locks, no clue. I”m trying to figure out how I could learn without having to you know, buy a safe.”

Avery nodded. “You ever feel bad about taking people’s money?”

“Sometimes, yeah. I try to read my marks. If a guy’s an asshole or homophobic because I’m pretty or you know, obviously cheating on his wife I don’t feel so bad about it. But I have to eat.”

Avery nodded. “You ever think it’d have been better to stay home?”

“Never. Not once.” He looked at him. “You having second thoughts?”

“No. I mean, I miss being in sports, playing Nintendo, shit like that, but no.”

Seth nodded. “Yeah, it’s hard to get used to having nothing to do, no one to do it with, but I found new ways to have fun.”

“And hey, now you have me.”

Seth gave him a lazy smile. “That I do. Company and entertainment all in one.” He crawled toward him on the bed like a cat on the prowl. Avery laughed as he pounced.

Avery was almost sorry when, on the third day he got up and discovered his knees didn’t hurt nearly as much as they had. Seth had brought him painkillers and ice and Avery had made a practice of stretching and moving around each day, remembering his coach’s advice from when he’d been on a team.

Seth came in with breakfast in a bag and coffee to find him getting dressed.

“Feeling better?”

“Yeah.”

“Your face is looking a lot better too. Just a scratch now.”

Avery nodded, feeling a little sad. Seth laughed.

“Hey.”

Avery looked at him.

“This doesn’t mean the fun’s ending, you know.” He touched his chin with a finger as he kissed him. “We’re just getting started.”

Avery smiled, feeling better. 

“And hey, breakfast.” Seth held up the bag. “McDonald’s finest.”

“Thanks for taking such good care of me,” Avery said while they ate.

Seth looked at him. “Of course.” He emptied a single sugar packet into his coffee. “Hate to say it but in our line of work chances are 100 percent that you’re going to have to do the same for me someday.”

Avery nodded. “You been hurt bad yet?”

“Once. Some asshole bloodied my face and then kicked me in the stomach while I was down. I had the presence of mind to curl into a ball so he only got in one good kick, but it hurt like hell.”

Avery covered his mouth. “What did you do?”

“Crawled into a nearby cardboard box and passed out. Wound up staying there for a day or two. Stuff like that is why it’s good to have a partner.” He smiled. ‘Beyond the obvious benefits.”

Avery smiled too and stole one of Seth’s French fries.

“I saw that.”

“Stolen food tastes better,” Avery said, shrugging.

“Ain’t that the truth.”

“How do you plan on us leaving town?”

“I checked and the nearest Greyhound bus leaves from the next town over. It’s about a ten-mile walk, so I figure that’s doable once you’re up to it.”

Avery nodded. “Maybe tomorrow?”

“Yeah, we can plan on that and if it’s a no go the next day is fine. That’s what’s great about being a gentleman of leisure.” He smiled. “We need to get you an ID first, and you should test your knees, so let’s plan on doing that next.”

The town had few buildings taller than two stories, and nearly everything was brown: buildings, ground, even the signage. There were few cactuses and no trees, only scrubby browning grass. A hot wind blew through the streets kicking sand into Avery’s lungs and making him cough. Above them the pale blue sky seemed to stretch forever.

“Drugstore’s this way.” Seth walked backwards for a bit, full of energy. Avery followed, his knees only protesting a little. “How are your knees?”

“Better, mostly.”

Seth nodded. “Cool. Maybe we can leave tomorrow. This town’s a bit depressing.”

Avery nodded his agreement. “Yeah, kinda.”

“The world’s our oyster, Grey. We can go wherever we like.”

“Somewhere green would be nice.” Avery hadn’t realized how much he appreciated the color green until he was faced with its near total absence. Even the few cactuses had a pale brownish look.

“I hear you.” Seth turned around and walked beside him. “Don’t think I could live in the desert forever.”

“I don’t think I’d mind a place in the middle of nowhere with a cactus garden,” Avery said. “It’s just this town. It’s like all the beauty just got stripped away to leave room for the devil’s cracker boxes.”

Seth laughed. “Oh my god. You, my friend have a way with words.”

Avery smiled, pleased. No one had ever told him that before. “Thanks.”

“That smile is going to be my undoing,” Seth said quietly in his ear.

Avery’s ears felt hot, making Seth smile wider. 

“We’re here,” he said, opening the door to a business with a mortar and pestle symbol etched into the glass door.

Stepping inside the pharmacy was like traveling back in time. The floor was large black and white tiles, the walls a cheerful pale pink, and the ceiling white tin. The shelves were short enough to allow a person to see over them. The pharmacy counter ran the length of the back of the store but an el faced the windows to a side street, and behind that counter was the phosphate machine. Jars and cubbys of candy of every description lined the phosphate counter, and a sign said, Candy for a penny apiece. A photobooth stood in the corner near the entrance. It was like the place was determined to make up for the lack of charm exhibited by the rest of the town.

A handsome young man stood behind the phosphate counter wearing a striped apron and matching hat. He smiled at them as they came in. He was tall and sandy haired and white. He looked to Avery like maybe he came with the time machine package. Nothing about this store seemed quite real to him.

“Howdy,” the young man said.

“Hello,” Seth said. “Hey, Avery, let’s get a phosphate.”

Avery had no idea what a phosphate was but it seemed to be some sort of beverage. “OK.”

They sat at the counter. Seth ordered a lemon phosphate, Avery after debate got cherry. It turned out to be a sour effervescent drink that he wasn’t sure whether he liked.

“This is a piece of Americana that’s going away,” Seth said, laughing at the expression on Avery’s face. “Now you can at least say you tried it.”

Avery bought a pixie stick for a penny and dumped the contents into his drink, stirring it with the straw, and tried that. It was somewhat sweeter that way. “That’s better.”

Seth laughed and rolled his eyes.

“You fellas just passing through?” the soda jerk asked.

“Yes,” Seth said.

“We don’t get too many strangers here.”

Seth nodded. “Well, if they knew about this drugstore that’d change. This place is awesome.”

He smiled, seeming pleased. “Nice of you to say.”

“Hey, Avery, I noticed the photobooth on the way in. We need to get some pictures.” Seth smiled at him.

Avery thought that was the entire reason they were here so was confused, but at the look in Seth’s eyes said, “Ohhh yeah. Let’s.”

They took photos separately and then a set of them together. Avery wanted to kiss Seth in one but didn’t dare, instead settled for looking goofy. The photobooth took the pictures in rapid succession anyway; there was hardly time to think. They looked at the photos afterwards. In one of them Seth was giving Avery rabbit ears.

“Glad to see we covered the classics,” he said, pointing to it.

Seth grinned. “Got some nice ones, too.”

They thanked the guy, who was watching them thoughtfully, and left. Once they were a block or two away Seth said, “We should leave today.”

“Why?”

“He noticed us. We don’t have a car, which if he mentions us to the cops will be easy enough to figure out. Which means we hitched or jumped a rail, which spells runaways.”

Avery looked at Seth, open mouthed. “I can’t tell if you’re paranoid or a genius.”

Seth shrugged. “I can’t be both? He was a little too interested in us. You may have noticed I deflected his line of questioning with a compliment. Little trick that often works. We look young, we’re on our own, and we might possibly be, you know … homosexual.” He uttered the last word in a mock scandalized whisper.

Avery laughed dutifully but now he felt worried. “OK. Let’s get this ID made and leave.”

“I think we should do it in the next town. It’s a bigger town and we’re less likely to get caught.”

Avery nodded. “So, we just check out then.”

Seth nodded too. “I think it’s for the best. Sorry if your knees aren’t quite ready.”

Avery shrugged. “It’s just ten miles. I used to run that for a warm-up. I’ll be OK.”

“What sports were you in?”

“Better to ask what I wasn’t in. I did track, baseball, football--”

“You’re kind of skinny.”

“I told you, I used to be buff. Also I was a running back.”

“Ah.”

“I was also on the basketball team. And summer swim team. Couldn’t fit it in during the year.”

“Holy fuck. You were um … “

“Dedicated?”

“I was going to say obsessed.”

“Kept me from thinking too much. My head was an unhappy place.” 

They were back at the motel. When they were inside their room Seth grabbed him and kissed him. “I’ve been wanting to do that all morning.”

Avery melted. “Do we have to leave right now?”

Seth smiled into the kiss. “I think we can spare a little time.” He pushed Avery backwards until they both fell onto the bed. They rolled around, laughing and breathless, sliding their hands inside of each other’s clothing. Avery closed his eyes as he came and opened them to see Seth looking at him with an unreadable expression. Avery looked back and Seth sat up abruptly.

“We should go.”

“OK. I mean, did you--”

“It’s fine, we need to get moving.” Seth got up and went into the bathroom, shutting the door gently but firmly behind him, leaving Avery to wonder if he’d done something wrong. He got up too and rearranged his clothing before packing his things in the communal suitcase, heart pounding with uncertainty and confusion.

Seth came out about twenty minutes later and saw Avery looking at him. “Please don’t look at me like that.”

“Uh, OK, I uh … “ he pushed past him and went to use the toilet himself, hating himself for the tears that ran down his nose once he was alone. The ground was slipping out from under him again and he didn’t know what to do. He washed his hands, looked around for items they might have forgotten, collected his toothbrush, razor, and toothpaste and left the bathroom.

Seth was finishing packing.

Avery handed him his things.

“Thanks.” Seth put them in the suitcase. “That everything?”

Avery nodded, not sure about where to look or what to say.

Seth locked the suitcase, looked at Avery, sighed. “Avery.”

Avery looked at him.

“This isn’t about you.”

Avery wasn’t convinced, but nodded doubtfully.

“Please don’t ask me to explain right now. I don’t believe in lying or pretending things are OK when they’re not, at least not with you. But … can you let it go? I promise you did nothing wrong.”

Avery’s heart lifted at the “at least not with you,” and he nodded more certainly now. “Of course. I’m sorry, I was just confused.”

“Understandable. Sorry to be a moody bastard.”

“It’s OK. You don’t … you don’t have to be perfect, you know A--as long as I know you still like me.”

“I promise I didn’t stop liking you in the past half hour,” Seth said with a smile. “And, thanks for honoring my wishes.”

Avery nodded. “We should probably go.”

Seth handed him the suitcase and locked the door after them. They walked to the office and Seth went in alone to settle up.

A cop car cruised by and Avery withdrew under the overhang that shaded the office entrance so he wouldn’t be seen. When Seth came out Avery gestured to him to join him. 

Seth did, looking puzzled until Avery whispered, “Cops.”

Seth looked around. “I don’t see them now. How long ago?”

“Minute or two.”

“Crap. Come on, let’s go this way.” Seth led him across the parking lot and down an alley that ran parallel to the road out of town. “We need to get your ID soon.”

“Yeah, sorry.”

“Don’t be. They’d have probably caught us. I just mean, if your dad is famous … “

“Notorious, more like, but yeah.”

Seth looked at him. “He in the mafia?”

“No, I mean, sort of. He’s a businessman who funds a lot of casinos and shit.”

“And yet you went to Vegas.”

Avery shrugged. “I needed money and I’m good at cards.”

“See, that’s what I really don’t get about you,” Seth said, leading him down another alley that led further out of town. “Your emotions are right there on your face. How are you good at cards?”

“Let’s play some time and I’ll show you.”

“You’re on.” Seth shook his head, walking quickly. “Still can’t believe you decided to gamble at a casino without a fake ID. I'm surprised they let you.”

“It was a busy casino floor. I slipped past the checkpoint.”

“But you had no idea they’d want your ID to cash your money in?”

“No.”

Seth laughed. “Babe. You need me.”

Avery looked at him. “Maybe.” His heart skipped a beat at the term of endearment.

“No maybe about it. Come on, I think we can sneak onto the highway now.” They were at the outskirts of town. Seth held out his hand. “Give me your ID.”

Avery did. “Why?”

Seth crouched down and opened the suitcase and hid Avery’s ID in the zipped pocket before shutting it again and standing up. “If the cops stop us you’re my brother and you don’t have ID because you don’t drive yet. We’re orphans and you’re coming with me to Kansas, where I heard there was work. We’re walking because our car broke down and we can’t afford a new one.”

Avery nodded. “OK.”

“You’re 17, I’m 21. If you’re 17 you’re too old for the foster system but still in school so it would make sense you’re with me. Our last name is Patrick. Our mom died when you were 11. Our dad died recently, both of cancer.”

Avery nodded again. “OK.”

They reached the highway and started to walk. Avery’s knees barely hurt, which he was grateful for. He kept pace with Seth’s slightly longer strides.

“How long have you been on your own?”

Seth glanced at him. “Since I was 15.”

“Wow. Three years, then.”

“Yeah.”

“You ever going to tell me why you left home?”

Seth was quiet for so long that Avery began to worry he was mad at him again. Finally, he said, in a flat voice, “I found out my grandfather was the local leader of the KKK.”

Avery stopped to stare at him. “No fucking way.”

Seth nodded. He stopped, too, looking out over the desert that surrounded the road. “I overheard him and some of his … lodge members, I guess, talking about what they were going to do to a troll family who’d had the audacity to set up a storefront.”

“Holy shit. What did you do?”

“I went and warned the trolls. When my grandfather and his friends arrived it was just me there, waiting for them. I told them what I had done and his friends wanted to lynch me as a traitor but my grandfather said, wait for me at home, in this icy voice. I had already packed. I didn’t go home. I just left town.”

“Holy fucking shit.” Avery said as they started walking again. “Wow, dude. That took balls. Why didn’t you just leave before they got there? I mean those guys could have killed you.”

“I didn’t care if they did at that moment. I was so full of rage. I just wanted to let him know what a scum I knew he was. And, I didn’t want them to think the trolls had anything to do with my disappearance. I hid my suitcase in the bushes outside their house. I knew I would be leaving, one way or another.”

“Wow,” Avery said. “Wow.” He had a whole new level of respect for his friend. He thought about it and wondered if he’d have had the guts to face down his father like that. He’d just left a note.

They walked in silence for a while.

“That wasn’t all I did.”

Avery looked at him. “There’s more?”

“I sent a letter to the local paper once I was safely out of town, with the names of my grandfather and all of his associates and told them they were the local KKK chapter. I’m not sure anything came of it because people there are divided on the topic.” Seth made a face. “But it was the best thing I could think to do.”

Avery nodded. “I mean, you’re probably right. People had to know already, to some extent. But maybe not everyone did. Maybe some good came of it.”

“Maybe.”

“Wow,” Avery said again as they walked. “Ho-ly shit.”

Seth laughed.

“Makes me feel a little cowardly, just leaving a note.”

Seth stopped. “Don’t be stupid. Your father said he’d as soon you were dead, which made him dangerous to you. You were smart to just leave a note.”

Avery nodded, swallowed. “Thanks.”

Seth smiled. “Of course, my grandfather has no fucking idea I’m gay. None of his business.”

Avery nodded, kept walking.

“Don’t think he’d be best pleased, somehow,” Seth added.

Avery laughed. 

“How’s the knee?”

“Little twingey, nothing too bad. I think except for that one last piece it was all pretty superficial, and that seems to be healing OK.”

“Good. That’s good. I’m glad you landed OK.”

“Well, you know, I skateboarded a lot back home. One thing you learn is how to fall. Of course, I wore knee pads.” 

Seth nodded.

“And usually the ramp wasn’t you know, moving.”

Seth chuckled. “I imagine not.”

“So the plan is, we get me an ID and hop a bus to a random location?”

“Yes. Somewhere in the Midwest, then we hop another train. The idea is to not leave a consistent trail. And they’ll be looking for Avery Dawson, not Avery Grey.”

“Dalton-Fox.”

Seth cut his eyes to him. “That’s almost as bad as my birth name.”

“OK, now you have to tell me.”

“You’re gonna have to take it to your grave.”

Avery crossed his heart.

“Rainbow Love.”

Avery stared. “You’re fucking shitting me.”

“No. My mom was a hippie, remember?”

“What did your grandfather think of that name?”

Seth frowned. “My changing it to the family name was a condition of her coming home.”

“Wow. What an asshole.”

“Yep.”

“So what was it then?”

“Aubrey Cabot.” Seth made a face.

“OK, that sounds like a guy who is asking to be punched.”

“Yeah, that’s what some people at school thought. Until I punched them back.” Seth smiled, a wicked little smile.

Avery smiled too. “You’re good in a fight?”

“Yes. Even better now that I’m on my own. You?”

“I can hold my own.”

“Let’s hope that’s true. I could tell you a few dirty tricks I’ve learned if you like.”

“All right.”

“Always go for the nuts or the eyes. This isn’t Golden Gloves. This is knock them the fuck down and run.”

Avery nodded. “Anything else?”

Seth continued to give him fighting tips as they walked, some of them truly diabolical, like stepping on someone’s nose when they were down.

“What’s the craziest thing you ever did in a fight?” Avery asked him after a while.

“Threatened to set a picture of this guy’s girlfriend on fire.”

“Did that work?”

“Yeah. It was in his wallet and I held it to his lighter and said I was going to burn it if he didn’t let my friend go, and he did. I lit the corner so he’d be distracted and let it drop and we ran.”

“What happened to your friend?”

“We had a parting of ideologies. He liked guns. I do not.”

Avery nodded. “Guns just seem to be a faster way to get yourself killed.”

“Glad we agree.”

“Did you and he--” Avery hated himself immediately for asking. He realized he sounded a bit like a jealous boyfriend.

“Have sex?” Seth was amused. “Yes. He was boring, though.”

“Oh?”

Seth laughed. “You love that I said something bad about him.”

Avery blushed. 

“He was grabby and once he was done he was done. And then he said normally he was straight but he was making an exception because I was so pretty and I dumped his ass.”

“I thought it was because of the guns.”

“Oh, that too. We hung together for a while after because it’s hard to find someone who has your back but I was starting to realize he didn’t. And then guns came up and I was like, see ya.”

“What a wanker.”

“Yeah.” 

“So, did you ever see him again?”

“Yeah, once. He was dead.” Seth looked off at the horizon.

Avery looked at him. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, me too. He was just a dumb kid. Two nights after I told him I was out he tried to rob a store at gunpoint and the clerk shot him dead. I saw him being put into a bodybag.”

“Fuck. That’s terrible.”

Seth nodded, still watching the horizon as they walked. “I blamed myself, but only briefly. He was dead set on getting a gun and he’d have probably gotten me shot, too. Sounds harsh, huh.”

“No. Realistic. That’s probably exactly what would have happened.”

Seth nodded. “Didn’t make it any easier.”

“No, I guess not.”

They walked in silence for a bit, each lost in his own thoughts.

“So what were you doing in Vegas?” Avery asked after a while, the thought just occurring to him.

“Same as you. Gambling. Only I got to collect my winnings without added drama.”

“How much did you make?”

“Not as much as you. Around five hundred.”

“Cards not your game?”

“No, they very much are. I just had some rotten luck.”

“Five hundred’s nothing to sneer at, though.”

“No.” 

“So how much money do we have?”

“Around $2,800.”

“Not too bad.”

“Nope. Enough to get us lost.”

Avery nodded. “Let’s hope.”


	6. Together Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avery thought a town where kids were allowed to carry guns as long as they knew how to use them sounded like a town that didn’t give a fuck what other people did, either.

Chapter Six

1993  
Mynah’s Creek, Louisiana

Fjordan--or Fee as he invited Avery to call him--drove a 1987 black Volvo sedan with tan leather seats and an engine that purred. He and Kiver occupied the front, the latter sitting sideways to avoid hitting her enormous thicket of horns on the window of the car, leaving Avery to share the backseat with the three kids. Rabbit opted for the foot well. It was only an hour's drive but it was a hot August day and Avery was grateful she'd turned down his offer to sit on his lap; scornfully in fact, as if such a thing was beneath her.

Avery didn’t know a lot about troll culture but he knew they formed families based on attachment rather than blood and the kids were left to fend for themselves for the most part, which probably had worked just fine on their home planet but was problematic on Earth. Troll kids weren’t required to attend school, and it was almost unheard of for one to get into a university. Some misguided humans occasionally tried to force the children into the foster system, which never ended well for anyone. The kids lived in packs and stole what they needed and were extremely distrustful of humans in general, with good reason. Many humans considered them to be savage beasts, and much debate had been given to the concept of giving trolls equal rights. And yet, somehow, no one had objected to the use of the advanced technology these “beasts” had brought with them, which had improved things like phone technology and factory robots immeasurably.

The trolls had invaded Earth unsuccessfully in 1910, disrupting the human conflict that had been building by giving them something to band together against. The troll generals, realizing that these scrawny soft-skinned Earth inhabitants were not quite as vulnerable as they looked, had fled, leaving behind stragglers, mostly foot soldiers, who had been promptly rounded up into camps, at least in the United States. During the Depression the government ran out of funds for running the camps so the trolls were freed, scattering to the cities and uninhabited regions. There was only a small troll population in Seattle that Avery had not been encouraged to associate with. There were no troll kids at his school. His only interactions with them had been through textbooks until he left home.

And now it seemed he was headed to a town that was run by them. He was interested to see how different that was from a town run by humans. Couldn't be worse. And anyway, he didn’t much care. Seth was alive and he’d be seeing him soon. That was all that mattered.

Fee was a talkative guy. Avery caught bits and pieces of his conversation with Kiver, mostly aimed at making her laugh. Avery hadn’t asked her pronouns but everything about her said girl, despite the fact that she could probably snap him in half without breaking a sweat. Besides the sexy halter top she wore makeup and had a habit of tossing her tangled hair when she laughed. Fee seemed thoroughly besotted. Avery thought that was nice. 

He watched the passing scenery and smiled at some of Fjordan’s jokes. He was enjoying the rare opportunity to relax and just listen to people talking, not having to contribute and remember every lie he’d told someone already to keep the story together, not having to watch carefully for signs the conversation was turning dangerous. He was just a passenger in a car filled with people he more or less trusted. 

Speaking of which, he glanced at Dodge Powerwagon. “You brought your gun, didn’t you.”

“Nuh uh. The mean lady won’t give it back.”

Kiver stuck out her tongue at Dodge. She seemed to be a woman of few words.

“You did try to shoot me with it,” Fee said.

“I wouldn’tve,” Dodge pouted.

“We’ll see about giving it back,” Fee said.

“Yeah, that means you’re not getting it back,” RZ said, crossing their arms.

“No,” Fee says, “it means what I said. I can’t have you wandering around town with a crap gun you don’t know how to shoot. Someone’ll end up dead. Doesn’t mean you can’t have one.”

RZ looked at him doubtfully but didn’t argue. 

Avery thought a town where kids were allowed to carry guns as long as they knew how to use them sounded like a town that didn’t give a fuck what other people did, either. Maybe he and Seth would have to stick around for a bit. He wondered how much it would cost to rent a place, and then he realized his total net worth was the $178 he’d stolen from tourists earlier that day and he doubted Seth had been able to keep the money they’d won.

Oh, well. Maybe they could find that abandoned shack they’d daydreamed about and Seth could teach him to fish.

The car crossed a rattletrap bridge and passed a gas station and a couple of other stores, winding through a town that looked like it was held together with wishes and promises. Many buildings were on stilts. Nothing looked new. A few troll children ran past. One appeared to have a live raccoon perched on their head.

Fee pulled the car up to a two-story yellow craftsman house and parked. Avery was out of the car and halfway up the porch before the car had fully come to a stop. The door opened and Seth stood there shirtless in pajamas, the left side of his face a complete mess. There was someone standing behind him but Avery only had eyes for Seth. He went to hold him but stopped abruptly. He wasn't sure he should with an audience. He didn't know how Seth would feel about it or how safe it was to be gay in this town.

As he stood there lost in indecision Fjordan came up onto the porch and swept the troll standing behind Seth into a deep embrace. “Rory! I missed you.”

Rory laughed.

“Come on, kids, we'll find you some food,” Fjordan said.

“Fee, did you adopt everyone you met again?” Rory asked, laughing, as they all trooped inside, followed by Kiver.

Avery turned back to see Seth watching him. He felt frozen in place until Seth held out his hand, which Avery saw was bandaged. He crossed the distance between them. He saw bruises on Seth's torso. “Broken ribs?”

Seth nodded.

Avery put his hand on Seth's cheek. “Your poor face.” He kissed him gently.

“You're alive,” Seth said, his voice breaking. He slid his arms around Avery, who held him carefully.

“Yeah.” His neck felt wet. He could feel Seth's body shaking as he held him. Avery had never felt so loved.

He could have stayed there in that one moment of certainty forever, knowing beyond a doubt that Seth loved him. Love wasn’t exactly a forbidden topic but neither of them had ever said it aloud. But after a while Seth pulled away, though he touched Avery’s face as he did so.

“I’m so sorry,” Avery said, his voice breaking.

“Don’t be.” Seth looked at his face. “Did you have a choice?”

Avery shook his head.

“Then don’t be sorry.”

Avery nodded. “How are you feeling?” he asked.

Seth shrugged, and winced. 

“That good, huh. Come on, let’s get you inside.” He slid his arm around his waist. “This OK?”

Seth nodded. “Yeah, everyone seems cool.”

Avery helped him inside. “Nice jammy pants.”

Seth snorted. “You are looking at my entire worldly goods, and these are borrowed.”

“They got everything, huh.” Avery opened the door and held it for Seth to walk through.

“Most of it, yes, and the swamp got the rest. You?”

“I at least have clothing I can wear to something besides a slumber party.” 

Seth snorted. “That it?”

“I have $178. Think we could get a place for a month?”

“We can ask.”

“How much do we owe the detective?”

“Nothing.”

Avery looked at him as they entered the kitchen.

“Yeah, I don’t trust it either,” Seth said quietly.

“Hey guys, you hungry?” Rory asked. 

The kids were all devouring bowls of what looked like leftover pot roast and potatoes. Kiver had a sandwich the size of a football. Fee’s plate just had crumbs on it.

Avery felt suddenly awkward. He was starving but he felt he already owed these people too much. He looked at Seth.

“I need to eat,” Seth said.

Avery nodded, concern for Seth taking precedence. “Yes, I could eat. Thank you, Rory. I’m Avery by the way.”

Rory smiled sunnily. “Believe it or not, I figured that out.”

Avery rolled his eyes and smiled.

Seth sat down awkwardly and Avery hurried to help him. It was clear he was fading fast. Avery ate the sandwich Rory gave him. It was good but he was too focused on Seth to notice it much. Once Seth had finished his bowl of soup Avery looked at Rory.

“His room’s upstairs. The bed’s big enough for two.”

Avery nodded. “Thank you.” He helped Seth out of his chair and up the stairs. Seth was leaning on him heavily by the time they reached the top. “You OK?”

“Just tired.”

Avery helped him into bed. “I should shower.”

“I was gonna say.”

Avery snorted. “You’re fine.” He wasn’t sure this was true but he didn’t want Seth to know he was worried. 

Seth closed his eyes and was asleep in seconds. Avery covered him with the bedclothes and stood watching him for a minute. Then he hung his jacket, shirt, and tie over the chair in the room, set his shoes and socks under the seat, and went to find the shower. He smiled a little, realizing how many of Seth’s habits had become his. This one, among others, was simply common sense. Knowing where your stuff was could mean the difference between running from your enemies in pants or your underwear.

He stood under the water for a while, letting it ease the tension from his body, grateful for a safe place to be and for people who had obviously taken good care of his boyfriend. They clearly needed to stay in this town for a while at least. Seth was in no shape to travel.

He dressed in just his trousers--his shirt smelled like sweat--and went downstairs to find a new person had joined the party. The kids were in the living room, watching television. The adults were in the kitchen drinking coffee. The newcomer was smoking a cigarette. They had curvy horns that gave them the look of a sea monster and a strong handsome dark face.

Rory looked up. “Avery. How is he?”

“He seems tired.”

“That’s understandable. He took quite a beating.”

Avery nodded. He hadn’t felt like crying until that moment. He went and got himself some coffee to cover how he was feeling, spent more time than usual stirring in cream and sugar. He went and sat down next to Kiver, who smiled at him. 

“Avery, this is Magnus, he/him,” Fjordan said. “Magnus, Avery Grey.”

“Hi,” Avery said, with a little wave. “Me, too. He/him, I mean.”

Magnus nodded. “Hello.”

Avery looked at his coffee, feeling suddenly weary.

“He should be better in a week or so,” Rory said gently. “Until then you’re welcome to stay here, or get your own place if you’d rather.”

Avery looked up. “How much is rent in this town?”

“Free,” Magnus said, letting out a stream of smoke.

Fjordan snapped a band he had around his wrist against his skin. Magnus looked at him.

“Want me to put it out?”

“No,” Fee said, a bit crankily. “I’m fine.”

“You’re doing great,” Rory told Fee.

Fee scowled, snapped his wrist again. Kiver leaned over and licked Fee’s ear. The scowl lifted a bit.

“Free?” Avery asked. “How can rent be free?”

“We run this town and we don’t believe in charging people for a roof over their heads,” Magnus said, shrugging.

Holy shit. This place really was Swamp-ri La.

“So, we can just claim a place as our own?”

“Yes. Just get yourself a lock from the hardware store.” Magnus said. “They’re free too. Just because stuff is free doesn’t mean people won’t steal it.”

Avery looked at them all. “Wow.”

“You still need money for some stuff,” Rory said. “Like clothes and food and your cell phone bill. But electricity and water are free and there’s a food shelf if you’re broke.”

“How do you keep a town running on no money?” Avery asked.

“Oh, we collect taxes. Whatever people can pay,” Magnus said. “And, you know, investments.”

“Investments.”

“Yes,” Magnus said calmly.

“Huh. You mentioned clothing.” He looked down at himself. “We could use some.”

“Or not,” Fee said.

Magnus made a scoffing noise.

“What?” Fee said, all innocence.

Magnus blew smoke in his face.

“You’ll want to go to Fizbee’s, then,” Rory said. “The thrift store’s really the only game in town, though you might be able to get a ride to Morgan City.”

Avery nodded. He was pretty sure Fjordan had just hit on him.

“You’re a cruel man,” Fjordan told Magnus, earning a wicked smile in return.

“Thought that was why you liked me,” Magnus said.

“I like you?” Fee asked.

Magnus cackled.

Avery laughed. “Which one of you is the doctor?”

Rory raised his hand. “That’d be me.”

“Thank you for taking such good care of Seth.”

Rory beamed. “Of course. Let me know if he needs anything to help him sleep. So far he’s been doing OK and I suspect he’ll sleep a lot better now that he knows you’re safe.”

Avery nodded, swallowed. “I owe you my thanks too, Fjordan. I … wasn’t sure we were going to see each other again.” He looked at his coffee.

“You’re very welcome.”

Avery nodded, took a sip. “Sorry about the misunderstanding with the kids.” He looked up.

Magnus arched an eyebrow.

Fee’s eyes skittered away. “Don’t mention it.”

Magnus looked at Fee, a small smile growing. “Misunderstanding?”

Fee shrugged. 

Kiver looked at Fee, trying to hide a smile.

Magnus said, “What happened?”

“Never mind.”

“Fjordan.” Magnus was full on grinning now. He had small pointy teeth like a piranha’s.

“They might have tied me up,” Fjordan said to his coffee.

Magnus burst out laughing. 

Fee directed a gesture at Magnus that might have been a backwards peace sign, but wasn’t.

“Did they use a jump rope?” Magnus drawled out the last two words.

“Yes.”

Magnus cracked up completely. “Oh my god.”

Everyone was laughing, including Fjordan, who seemed to have a good sense of humor about himself.

“They had a gun!” he said.

Magnus fell off his chair.

“Well, what would you have done?”

Magnus couldn’t speak. He sat on the floor laughing.

“I am never living this down, am I,” Fjordan said.

Magnus shook his head, still giggling. “Nope.” He pulled himself up again and sat in his chair, lighting another cigarette, still snickering. 

Fjordan went to the fridge. “I need a beer.”

“Get me one?” Magnus asked.

“Fuck you,” Fjordan said, good naturedly. He came back with one beer. Magnus pulled him down on his lap and kissed him, then stole his beer. Fjordan stayed where he was, sharing the beer with Magnus.

Avery glanced at Kiver, who couldn’t have seemed less concerned. She was making her hair into various mustaches, crinkling her face so they stayed. Apparently she didn’t mind sharing. She turned her head so Avery could admire her latest mustache.

He smiled and gave her the thumbs up.

She grinned and the mustache fell. Her grin was frankly terrifying with all those huge teeth but she seemed nice enough. 

“I should go check on Seth,” he said.

Rory smiled at him. “See you later, then.” 

Avery nodded, thinking as he went upstairs that he liked these people. He could see himself sticking around for a while, and he wasn’t sure if that was a nice thought or a scary one.

Seth was still asleep. It wasn’t that late in the day but Avery got undressed and climbed in beside him, sliding an arm around his waist under the covers. Seth made a noise and pressed his back against Avery’s chest, and Avery lay there holding him, grateful in that moment to be exactly where he was. After a long time he drifted off to sleep.

The next morning it was just the two of them and Rory at breakfast. Rory looked a little bleary eyed but seemed cheerful. “Morning,” he said, yawning. “Hope cereal and coffee are OK.”

Avery nodded. “Where’d the kids go?”

“Fjordan took them home with him. He and Kiver have more space for guests. They’re going to go house hunting today.”

“Cool. So, they’re staying?”

“Seems like.” Rory smiled. “I unfortunately have to work today. You two should feel free to hang out, rest up. I hope I don’t have to mention not to fool around.” He looked at them. “Your ribs are not up for it, Seth.”

Seth saluted him. 

“How would I go about house hunting?” Avery asked.

“Well, I mean, you can just walk around town and look, or you can ask one of us to show you around. I’m sure Fee’d be happy to. He doesn’t have regular hours like the rest of us.”

“I don’t want to be any trouble.”

“Trust me, you wouldn’t be.” He gulped down the rest of his coffee. “I gotta go. Patients await.”

“Thanks for letting us stay,” Avery said.

“No problem at all.” 

After he left Avery looked at Seth. “Does this feel weird to you, too?”

Seth nodded emphatically. “Yeah. I mean, not bad weird but weird.”

“I keep waiting for the catch.”

“I know what you mean, but what if there isn’t one?” Seth talked even slower than usual due to his busted jaw. “What if this is the real deal?”

“Then we try to appreciate it, I guess. Don’t let ourselves be too jaded to enjoy good luck when we find it.”

“When did you get so smart?” Seth touched his jaw.

“I’ve always been the smart one.”

Seth laughed. “What does that make me?”

“Well, you were the cute one but now …”

Seth scoffed. Avery poured them both cereal and milk and handed Seth his coffee, black, one sugar, before sitting down across from him.

“I can look for a place for us unless you want a say.”

Seth shrugged. “No basements.”

Avery nodded. “I can start tomorrow.” He didn’t finish the thought aloud that he didn’t want to be too far from Seth so soon, having only just found him. He concentrated on his cereal. “I doubt there are any basements in this town, anyway, seeing as half the houses seem to be on stilts.”

“Good point. I myself have not seen any of the town. Just the gas station where I passed out and this house and its environs.”

“How the hell did you get all the way here anyway? We’re an hour’s drive from Baton Rouge.”

“I don’t rightly remember. I stole a boat and paddled like my life depended on it. I’m sure that’s how I further damaged my ribs, not to mention my hands.”

Avery winced.

“The boat turned out to have a hole in it and I had to abandon ship in a hurry and wade through the swamp. That’s how I destroyed my suit. My phone fell out during the fight over the suitcase in front of the hotel.”

“I am so sorry I told them where you were.”

“Don’t be. They’d probably have shot you for lying. Those guys did not fuck around.”

“Guess we were stupid to try to cheat them, huh.”

“Probably. Next time maybe we just play it straight.”

Avery nodded. “Sure, if we can find a game that’s not rigged. You know that one was.”

Seth nodded too. “Yep. There’s the rub. You can’t win if you play straight against a crooked house.”

“Sounds like the name of one hell of a country song.”

Seth laughed.

“Well, maybe in this town we play a new game. With the house for a change,” Avery said, feeling hopeful.

“Maybe,” Seth looked a little uneasy. “Let’s go slow, OK?”

Avery nodded. “For sure. I’m not saying this is Swamp-ri La, but fuck. It sure feels like it might be.”

Seth nodded. 

“What happened to your wallet, by the way?” Avery asked.

“I took off my jacket to row.” 

“Oh, fuck.”

“Yeah, that boat sank fast.” Seth still looked tired. 

“You need to sleep,” Avery said.

“I’m not tired enough.”

“I could, I dunno, read to you or something. They got any books here?’

Seth laughed. “I read the one with the normal title.”

“Leaving what?”

“You’ll see.” Seth stood up slowly and went to the living room and lay down on the couch. Avery covered him with an afghan in day glo colors before going to the bookshelf.

“So you read that one?” He pointed to a slim volume called Sex and Death Inside.

Seth nodded. “I couldn’t hold the other one properly.”

“Well no fucking wonder.” Avery pulled the hefty book off the shelf and read the title. “What’s the point of putting the entire plot on the cover?”

“I dunno. Must be a troll thing.”

Avery sat down in a squashy armchair. “Kind of ruins the suspense.”

“I don’t think suspense is a big consideration.”

“Right, might get in the way of all those sex scenes.”

Seth laughed. “Ow.”

“Sorry.”

“S’fine. You gonna read or what?”

“Fine, reading will now commence.” He opened the book and started to read it out loud. “Vremia flounced down the long marble staircase, her breasts bouncing in her lacy--”

“I’m gonna stop you right there,” Seth said. “They bounced?”

“I’m just reading what it says.”

Seth snorted and waved for him to continue.

“--low-cut bodice.” 

Seth started giggling, and Avery joined in. “I can stop.”

“No, no, this is good. Please, continue.”

“Today was the first day of the contest that would decide her fate, and those of the hundreds of trolls who had fallen in love with her, and definitely not, as that horrible Crikas had suggested, her wealth.”

Seth snickered.

Avery continued to read. It was simply awful but hilariously so. Seth fell asleep after only a few pages but Avery read some more of it to himself, glad to just be here in his company, safe in a house in a swamp.


	7. Elvis Never Left This Building

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avery just smiled. He was enjoying this, but there was no way he was revealing his actual long game.

Chapter Seven

1989  
A few days later

“So, have you boys found Jesus?” 

Avery glanced at Seth, across from him in the backseat of the wood-sided station wagon. Between them slept a dog who was possibly older than either of them, lying on a faded quilt.

“Oh, yes, sir,” Seth said smoothly. “I plan to find us a congregation soon as we get where we’re going.”

“Where’d you say you were headed?” the man asked, looking back over his shoulder briefly as he drove. Next to him his wife sat knitting, listening to music playing quietly on the car radio.

“Uh, St. Louis, sir. I heard there was work.” Seth’s accent changed subtly, with just a hint of earnest country boy instead of his usual sardonic drawl.

“Where you boys from?”

“Well, I’m from North Carolina, sir, but my brother was raised in California. We’ve only just reunited. He was living with our father, who passed on, and his last wish was that I would look after him.”

Avery nodded.

“That’s mighty Christian of you, son.”

“Well, sir, blood is blood.”

The man nodded, as if that was the truest thing he’d ever heard.

“Amen,” said his wife, and started to sing a hymn.

Avery glanced at Seth again. He wasn’t sure how long he wanted to stay in this car. It beat walking by only the slimmest of margins. He’d heard once too often that salvation was for straight people only and the lyrics to the song set him on edge with their blithe assumption that theirs was the only truth worth believing.

Seth glanced back. “Sir, I saw a billboard for a motel up ahead. Do you think you could drop us off there? My brother’s a little carsick and we’ve been traveling a while now. I think a couple days of rest would do us both some good.”

Avery nodded and held his stomach. 

“Oh you poor dear. Our Sarah used to get that,” the woman stopped singing and reached back to pat Avery on the knee.

“You boys sure you’ll be OK?”

“Oh, yes sir. The good Lord will protect us.”

“Well OK, then.”

Soon they were standing in the front of the motel and restaurant, waving goodbye to the man and his wife.

“I’m sorry,” Avery said. “They were a harmless enough ride to our next destination.”

Seth looked at him. “Speak for yourself. I think I’m gonna have Onward Christian Soldiers stuck in my head for a month.”

Avery laughed. “The good Lord will protect us?”

Seth shrugged. “It’s what he wanted to hear. Put yourself in an identifiable pigeon hole and you become invisible. We’ll be those good Christian boys in their future stories about us, no longer something to ponder over. I doubt they’ll remember our faces.”

Avery nodded, not for the first time admiring how easily Seth made himself part of the scenery.

“I personally am reluctant to follow someone who finds himself so frequently lost,” Seth drawled as they turned to look at their new location.

Avery giggled and turned to look too.

The motel consisted of a one-story building with turquoise siding flanked by five cabins in varying shades of pastel. A huge sign outside declared that the place provided good eats and good sleep. Several cars were parked in a lot to the side.

“And anyway, I didn’t lie. We’ve been traveling for a while. Maybe this is just what we need.”

Avery nodded. His stomach growled audibly.

Seth laughed. “Let’s go get some of those famous good eats.”

The bell over the door jangled merrily as they stepped inside. Avery’s first impression was that Elvis’s garage had exploded. Everything was naugahyde, glittery countertops, and pictures of the singer alongside pictures of various cars and actual car parts, mostly hubcaps. A jukebox was playing Love Me Tender. Booths lined the wall next to the window, a long counter with stools stood opposite and they could see the cook through a pass-through window, wearing a hairnet over his graying Afro.

“Hey kids, sit anywhere you like,” the waitress said. She was a middle-aged white woman with a dark bouffant hairdo. She wore a white apron over her turquoise waitress dress that more or less covered her ample breasts.

Seth nabbed a seat by the window and Avery slid in across from him. The woman handed them oversized laminated menus. 

“The apple pancakes are good today but stay away from the Mexican omelette. Lou’s in an experimentin’ mood.”

“I heard that, woman!” the cook shouted.

The waitress laughed.

“Now I feel like I have to try that,” Seth said.

“Your funeral, cutie. Coffee?” 

“Yes please, two.”

The woman sashayed away. Besides the two boys there was a family of four in the farthest booth, the parents looking tired, the oldest kid maybe two. The woman was breastfeeding the baby. Avery looked away quickly.

The waitress came back with two cups of coffee. “Brought you cream and sugar since I forgot to ask.”

“Thanks,” Seth said.

Avery nodded.

“I’ll give you some more time with those menus,” she said and went to see if the other table needed anything.

Avery put cream and sugar in his coffee.

“And anyway, that question is one you are practically being begged to lie about, have you found Jesus,” Seth scoffed quietly. “It’s like ‘are you fucking my daughter.’”

Avery nearly spit out the sip of coffee he’d just taken. He laughed.

Seth smiled. “I mean, you either say what they want to hear or gear up for one hell of a fight.”

Avery was still laughing. “Have you ever?”

“Have I ever what?”

“You know, fucked a girl.” He kept his voice down.

“I believe it’s called making love,” Seth said.

Avery just looked at him.

“Nah, I’m just fucking with ya. Yes. I have fucked a girl. Once or twice. I’m an equal opportunity fucker.”

Avery laughed. “Huh. I’ve never really seen the appeal.”

Seth shrugged. “Once you’ve had sex with a troll you realize it’s all just plumbing anyway. It’s the attraction that matters, the connection.”

“I don’t follow.”

“They’ve got both,” Seth said, shrugging, looking over his menu.

Avery was taken aback. “Wow.”

“Yes. And anyway, let’s say you were really into a guy and then found out he was born with female parts. Would you dump him for that?”

Avery stopped. He’d never thought about that. “Uh, no, I guess I wouldn’t.”

“So there you have it. It’s the person, not their body parts.”

“How does that even work? With the trolls?”

“Their dicks are retractable,” Seth whispered. “I think I’m gonna have to try that omelette.”

“Re--tractable?” Avery’s voice went up. “Wow. That’s … holy shit.”

“Yeah. Be kind of nice to be able to avoid accidental boners.”

Avery laughed. “You’re not wrong. I think I’ll have the apple pancakes.”

“Cool. We’ll cover the spread.”

The waitress came and took their orders, laughed at Seth’s. “You like to live dangerously, don’t you.”

He grinned.

After she left Avery played with his silverware for a bit. 

“Something on your mind?” Seth asked.

“You’ve had sex with a lot of people, haven’t you?” He wasn’t jealous, exactly, just curious.

“I told you, had to find some way to entertain myself.”

Avery looked up. “I’m serious.”

“So am I. I told you sex and love are not the same thing as far as I’m concerned. Sex is fun, and frankly I’m a nicer person if I get some once in a while.”

Avery nodded. “How does that work? You just say, do you wanna?”

Seth shrugged. “Depends on the circumstances. Sometimes I just needed a place to sleep, and was attracted to someone, so I’d try to get myself an invitation. Other times I’d find myself in a social situation where it just felt right. It’s not like I had to court them. We were both after the same thing and the next day I was gone.”

“Huh. You were never tempted to stick around?”

Seth gave him a look like he thought that was an odd question. “And then what? Get a job at the convenience store? Pay too much money to live in a closet? Watch my life slowly drain away? All for a few rolls in the sack?”

“So, you just plan to travel forever?”

“Who knows? I just know, if it’s not right I’m outta there and I haven’t found a place that’s right yet.”

Avery nodded. “Yeah. I get that.”

“I do know that nine to five on anything other than a temporary basis would probably literally kill me.”

The waitress brought their food. 

“Thanks, Helen,” Seth said.

She winked at him as she set down the syrup and hot sauce. “Get you two anything else?”

“Do you know if there’s a room available?”

“Oh, no, sorry love, we’re all booked up.”

Seth nodded. “Thanks. I think we’re good for now.’

“Well, just holler if you need anything.”

The family of four got up and paid their bill. The father didn’t look much older than them. He was a skinny guy with low-riding jeans and cornrows. He held the toddler on his hip as he paid with cash. She sucked her thumb and stared at Seth. The mother managed the fussing infant and a huge bag of stuff with toys and diapers sticking out the top. She was tiny; there seemed to be more bag than woman. The kids were cute and the couple seemed good natured about their lot in life but Avery thought he’d rather poke himself repeatedly with a sharp stick.

Seth caught him watching them and smiled to himself. “Not interested in procreating?”

“God no.” He turned back to his food as the family left. “I mean, can’t think of anything more terrifying than being given a helpless sack of screaming life and being told, welp, you’re on your own now. Good luck and don’t drop it.”

Seth laughed. 

“What about you?” Avery took a bite of apple pancake. “Man, this is good. She didn’t lie.”

“Kids? I mean, if I ended up with one somehow I’d deal. But make one on purpose? Pass.” Outside the day had turned grey, threatening rain.

Avery laughed. “How’s the omelette?”

“Not too shabby. Not sure I’d be brave enough to pair salami with Neufchatel and call it Mexican, but it works.”

“Neu what?”

“It’s a German soft cheese.”

“How do you know this shit?”

Seth just smiled.

Helen stopped by to refill their coffee. ”What do you think of the omelette?”

“Tell the chef I think it’s a brave but successful pairing.”

Helen laughed. “You sound like one of those food writers.”

Avery looked at Seth, realizing something. “Where are we gonna stay tonight?”

Seth looked at Helen, then back at Avery. “We’ll think of something.”

“There’s another motel 30 miles down the road,” Helen said.

Avery nodded glumly, glancing at the gloomy sky. “Right.”

“What’s the matter, honey?”

He shrugged. “It’s just a long walk.”

Seth was still watching the exchange.

“You mean you don’t have a car? Oh, lordy.”

Avery shook his head.

“Lou, these boys have got nowhere to stay the night,” she called.

“How do they feel about washing dishes? Goddamned dishwasher’s useless.”

“You thinking the back room?” Helen asked Lou.

“Yeah, but we can’t pay them.”

Helen turned back to them. “You boys OK with trading labor for room and board?”

“Absolutely,” Seth said.

“Thank you,” Avery said.

“How on earth did you plan on leaving this place if you don’t have a car?” Helen asked.

“Same way we got here. Hitch a ride,” Avery said.

“Oh, honey, no. Tell you what. I go shopping on Saturdays. If you’re willing to wait three days I’ll drive you to town then, you can catch a bus or something. I think we can pay for your ticket at least, right, Lou?”

Lou’s only answer was a grunt.

“Yes, that’s what we’ll do. You finish eating and come on and help with the breakfast dishes. Then you can spend the day as you like until there’s more dishes to do. Usually we have a bunch until like 2 and more after we close.”

“Sounds great, thank you,” Seth said.

Avery nodded.

“Don’t worry about paying for your food. We’ll consider it your wages.”

Lou grunted again.

“If you’re finished eating I can show you where you’re staying,” Helen said.

The back room turned out to be a small staff break room with a large sagging couch, a card table and three folding chairs. There was also a small fridge with a microwave perched atop. A narrow horizontal window overlooked the cabins. The walls of the room were a light gray. The couch was faded and brown. The lighting wasn’t very good but the room was clean and only a little stuffy in the early summer heat. Outside thunder rumbled.

“Be a bit cozy I’m afraid. The couch pulls out into a bed, though, and I can get you some bedding.”

“Thank you, Helen, this is great,” Seth said, setting the suitcase on one of the folding chairs. “This will do us fine.”

She smiled. “I’ll let you get settled for a bit.” She left them alone.

Seth looked at Avery after she was gone. “That puppy dog routine you’ve got going on is turning out to be very useful.”

“What puppy dog routine?”

“That’s so far to walk on my little paws,” Seth said with an exaggerated doe-eyed expression.

“Fuck you. It was.”

Seth laughed. “So, anyway, you’ll notice she didn’t ask about our relationship, which could signal that she’s either A) Ok with the gay or B) so oblivious it would never occur to her. Since we’re relying on them for a nice free place to stay we’re gonna have to assume B, which means ixnay on the aygay.”

“She doesn’t seem oblivious.”

“True, but this is the corollary to the assume your enemy’s smart rule. Assume people expect you to be just like them.”

Avery nodded. “OK.” His enthusiasm for this situation lessened.

Seth laughed. ‘Don’t look so down. I just mean during the day. I doubt she’s gonna spend her nights listening at our wall with a drinking glass.” He mimicked a shocked person listening to something, bent over with his hand cupped to his ear.

Avery laughed. “Yeah, OK, good point.”

“Come on,” Seth said. “Let’s go earn our keep.”

The kitchen was small but not so small three people couldn’t work comfortably in it. Lou showed them how the dishwasher worked, and where the scrubbing up things were, handed them aprons and gloves and went back to cooking. He seemed to be the non-talkative sort. 

The cafe got busy around noon and Avery ended up busing while Seth washed. Helen was grateful for the help. 

“What’s your name, Sweetie?”

“Avery.”

“That’s a nice name. I appreciate your helping me out, Avery.”

“Pleasure’s all ours, Ma’am,” he said, channeling Seth. He carried a big tub of dishes into the back and helped Seth wash for a bit. He was actually having fun. Seth seemed to be in a good mood as well. After awhile the rush subsided and they worked side by side, listening to the radio and singing along if they knew the words.

“Lou, will you ask Avery to come out here and mop?” Helen asked.

“Who’s Avery?”

“Louis Monroe, did you not ask those nice boys their names?”

“I just call that one Blondie.” Lou pointed a thumb at Seth.

“Lou, they’re both blonde.”

“Well, then one’s bound to answer, isn’t he.”

Avery laughed. “I’ll go mop.”

Lou grunted.

Seth grinned. “Can I call you Afro, then?”

“Not if you want to live,” Lou said.

Seth laughed. So did Avery.

When the floors were mopped, dishes washed, Helen brought them burgers and fries and sodas and left them alone in a booth to eat them. “There’s a bathroom with a shower off your room if you want to freshen up, and feel free to use the laundry room down the hall.”

“You sayin’ we smell?” Seth said, grinning at her.

“Never met a teenaged boy who didn’t, honey.”

Seth laughed. Avery was too busy eating. Seth laughed at him.

“Hungry?”

Avery just nodded, his mouth full of burger.

A noisy family came in, laughing and dripping water all over the floor, and sat down. Helen went to take their order.

After they ate--Helen gave them pie, too--they went back to their room. Avery sniffed his armpit.

“Whoo. No wonder she mentioned a shower.”

Seth was already stripping off his clothes. Avery stopped to watch, distracted. 

“You want to go first?” he asked.

Seth shook his head no, grinning. He kissed Avery and unbuckled his belt.

“I thought you said no … “

“We have to be quiet is all.” He backed Avery into the bathroom, still grinning, kissing and undressing him as they went. He turned on the water and handed Avery the soap, ducking under to get his own hair wet before shampooing it. The shower stall was made for one person so they had to stand very close together. Seth washed Avery’s hair next, and Avery, following his lead, washed Seth’s body for him. He didn’t think he’d ever get tired of touching him, his pale perfect skin, the long lean muscle underneath, his beautiful cock.

Seth stilled and Avery looked up at him. Slowly, he knelt in front of him and took him into his mouth. He didn’t know what he was doing, still learning, but judging from Seth’s reaction he was doing just fine. Afterwards he licked his lips and smiled up at him. Seth grinned down at him and tackled him so he felt out onto the bathroom floor. Avery laughed and Seth clamped his hand over his mouth. He held a finger to his lips. Avery nodded to show he understood.

Seth pressed little kisses down Avery’s body and then took him into his mouth. Avery had to stuff his fist into his own mouth after a while to stop from crying out. Seth took his time. Avery thought he was going to lose his mind before he finally let him come. Afterwards he lay there panting.

“You’re a bastard.”

Seth chuckled. “Yeah. Pretty much.”

Avery propped himself up on his elbows. Seth kissed him.

“I think I need another shower.”

Seth laughed quietly. “Yeah, me too.”

The hot water was running out so they showered quickly, emerging into the main room wearing towels. Seth offered to do the laundry since he had more clothes than Avery. He put on the trousers from his linen suit and gathered up their dirty things. Avery smiled, watching him.

Seth caught him watching and smiled. “You ogling me, Grey?”

Avery nodded. “Absolutely.”

Seth grinned. “Be right back.”

Avery went and got a drink of water from the bathroom and brushed his teeth, still smiling. He went and sat at the table in their room and saw a deck of cards in the open suitcase. He was shuffling them when Seth came back.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey yourself.” Seth closed the door, smiling. “Whatcha doing with that deck of cards?”

“Want to see how I win at poker while we wait for our clothes?”

“Sure. I mean,” Seth said, sitting down at the table, “strip poker would be more fun but that’d be a short game in our present state.”

“So, we play for other stakes.”

“What do you propose?”

“Well, not money … hmmm. I know. Truth or dare.” 

“Truth or dare.” Seth raised an eyebrow.

“Yes. Only we have kind of a small rein for dares so I’m thinking, truth. You lose, you spill a secret.”

Seth regarded him for a long moment. “OK. Not my favorite game but I’ll play along. I’m gonna beat you anyway.”

“You think so, huh.”

“I know so, Grey. I can read you like a book.”

“Prepare to eat your words.”

Avery won the first hand. He’d learned a long time ago, playing cards with his teammates, that he had a terrible poker face. So, instead of fighting it he’d learned to play it to his advantage. He managed to look like he was hiding a secret with every single hand, no matter how bad it was.

“Well, I’ll be,” Seth said. “You fooled me.”

“You gotta tell me a truth now.”

“How does that work exactly?”

“I ask you a question, you answer me honestly.”

“OK, well I agreed to the terms and I’m no welcher, so hit me.” Seth looked like he was bracing himself.

Avery looked at Seth and realized he didn’t want to ask him anything he didn’t want to reveal. They were having a good day. Why ruin it? He smiled. “What was your favorite cartoon show when you were a kid?”

Seth looked at him for a long moment, then smiled too. “Looney Toons. Duh.”

“Who was your favorite character?”

“Eh eh. You’ll have to beat me again first.”

Avery did.

“How the fuck are you doing that? You beat me with a crap hand again.” Seth looked at him, realization dawning. “You little shit. You have a reverse poker face.”

Avery laughed. “Sort of, yeah. Spill.”

“Bugs Bunny. As if you couldn’t guess that one.”

Avery laughed. 

“Let’s play another hand, hot shot.”

This time Seth won. He smiled. “Got you figured out.”

Avery shrugged. “I let you win.”

“You fucking did not.” Seth was laughing.

“Believe what you want. Winning too often isn’t good for the long game.”

“And what is your long game?”

Avery just smiled. He was enjoying this, but there was no way he was revealing his actual long game. He’d known Seth a week and knew it would send him running for the exits. “You can ask me a question if you like.”

“Fine, how did you let me win?”

“You have a tell.”

“OK, I’ll bite. What is it?”

“Your left eyebrow goes up ever so slightly if you’ve got a good hand.”

“Fuck. It does?” Seth touched his face.

“Yeah. Might want to work on that.”

Seth chuckled. “Smart ass.” He set his cards down. “This is good, though. We should practice more often. Help each other get better for the real deal.”

Avery nodded. “Yeah.” He smiled, thinking of other things he’d like to practice more often.

“You’re thinking about sex, aren’t you.”

He blushed. ”Uh, yeah.”

“So transparent.” Seth stood up and grabbed his face, kissing his forehead. “I’m gonna go check on the laundry situation. We probably need to get back to work soon.”

The diner was busy that evening despite the rain and they ended up washing dishes far into the evening, taking a break for food, which they ate in the kitchen because the dining room was full. Lou might have acted curmudgeonly, but he made sure they had big portions of the casserole du jour and Helen brought them coconut cake for dessert. Avery thought there would be worse things than just staying here for awhile.

“This is OK,” he said as they ate. Lou was at the stove, frying up orders, the radio on low to not compete with the jukebox, which seemed to have mostly Elvis.

Seth nodded. “Yeah. Don’t get too comfy.”

Avery shrugged. “I know we can’t stay but it’s a nice break.”

“Need a break already?” Seth seemed amused.

“You know what I mean.”

“Yeah, I do. This is part of it, you know. Accepting good things that fall your way, because you know you’re gonna get bad, too.”

“Yeah.” Avery felt that he could deal with most things if he had Seth around to go through it with him. The feeling scared him a little but he pushed it aside. So far, Seth had shown nothing but a preference for his company. He smiled at him.

Seth smiled back. “I can practically see the wheels turning in that head of yours.”

Avery laughed. “Nothing bad, don’t worry.”

“I wasn’t.” He hopped up. “Come on. Those dishes won’t wash themselves.”

By the end of the evening Avery was weary but in a good way. He mopped the kitchen floor while Lou cleaned the stove and Seth put the pots and pans back in their places for tomorrow. Helen was cleaning the front.

“That oughta do it,” Lou said finally. “Get some sleep.”

Avery yawned and shuffled off to their room, tossing his dirty apron in the laundry bin. “Wonder how they manage when we’re not here.”  
‘  
“My guess is this is an early night for them,” Seth said. “It’s hard work running a business.”

Avery nodded. “I need another shower.”

Seth joined him. They stood together under the hot water, trading sleepy kisses until they felt clean, then climbed into bed. Seth suggested they at least try to look straight in case of surprise visitors so he wore his one pair of pajama pants and Avery wore a pair of briefs and the last clean T-shirt. The rain had subsided for the most part but still pattered gently against the window outside.

“We’ll have to do laundry again in the morning,” Seth said. “We’re out of clothes again.”

“Yeah.” Avery yawned and cuddled up to his pillow. “Good night.”

Seth put his hand on his face and kissed him. It was a nice, gentle kiss. “Good night.”

Avery fell asleep smiling.


	8. A Room With a View

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fee had been right. Avery felt exactly like a brownie sundae.

Chapter Eight

1993  
The next day  
Mynah’s Creek

“So, how long have you two been together?” Fjordan asked, easing the car down the bumpy road. 

“Uh, four years.” It was an oppressively hot August day but fortunately Fee’s car had air conditioning. “It’s nice of you to drive me around.”

“No problem. Judging from your accent I’m betting you’re not used to this heat yet.”

“I’ve gotten better at tolerating it,” Avery said, “but days like this …” Unlike Seth, Avery had a permanent tan from traipsing around the southern United States. Seth went through sunscreen like crazy. The sun had also lightened Avery’s hair from sorta to definitely blonde and Seth’s to nearly white.

“Yeah, welcome to Louisiana.” Fjordan grinned and popped a toothpick into his mouth. He kept a small glass of them in the car cup holder.

“You’re from Ireland, right?”

“Yep. Belfast. Coldest fucking rock on earth that doesn’t have reindeer.”

Avery laughed. “Suppose you’ve been here a while, though.”

“Nah. Since May, actually. I just never was properly warm back home, so I love this heat.” Fee was a hard little rock of a man with arms like a lightweight boxer’s. Avery doubted he had any body fat to speak of. 

“Since--May? Wow.” 

“I know,” Fee smiled. “I just, I dunno, found my place here.”

Avery nodded. “I guess you did.”

Fjordan pulled the car off the road. “Here’s the first place I want to show you. I found three that’ll work for two people. I assume you want to live together?” He parked the car in the shade of several trees lining the deck that ran around the first floor of the building, which sat partly in the river. It was a three-story building with grey siding and balconies overlooking the river. A private dock ran alongside, at which two boats were moored presently. “This place is a bit small but sounded doable for two. Haven't seen it yet myself.”

“Yes. This looks like a real nice building.” Avery got out of the car and immediately felt sweaty. His shirt clung to him. A dragonfly buzzed by. Somewhere in the river something big made a blooping noise as it dove. Everything here was leafy and green and felt slightly wet and very alive.

“Yeah, you could just decide to snap this one up. The apartment’s on the top floor so you have easy access to the roof deck too.”

“I think I’m sold already, but let’s take a look.”

Fjordan fished around in the backseat of the car and then held up a doorknob with a key sticking out of it, and placed it in Avery’s hand. “Here. This way no one else can scoop you on it.”

The building had six units that sat side by side, all facing the river, and no elevator. Fjordan led the way to the vacant apartment and opened the door. Inside the place was stuffy from being shut up for a while. It had hardwood floors, slightly dingy painted walls that were probably originally white, and an open plan, with only the bathroom and a small closet shut off from the rest. To the immediate right was a small kitchen. Fjordan tested the stove, which worked. There was a full-sized refrigerator as well.

“Nice. Working appliances and everything.” He went into the bathroom, whistled. “Come see this tub. Kiver could take a nap in that thing.”

The tub was a huge clawfoot with a shower attachment. Fjordan tested the sink and toilet to make sure they worked. 

“You could definitely do worse.” He flipped the lights and a ceiling fan in the main room started its slow rotation, picking up speed. “Ceiling fan, too. And hey, look, you have some furniture to work with.” He checked the cupboards. “No dishes, though that’s easily remedied.”

There was a double bed and a couch and a rickety wooden table with two chairs in the main room. Nothing fancy and they’d need to get bedding, but it beat having nothing. Avery tested the mattress. It looked OK and didn’t smell of mold.

“I’d say take it, lad. You’re not gonna find better, especially not with a view like this.” Fjordan indicated the balcony and the view of the river and the swamp beyond. A couple of trolls rowed by lazily in a rowboat. 

“I can’t believe this is free,” Avery said. He could get used to the heat for this. Different clothes would probably help, too. He was still wearing his expensive suit, though he'd left the jacket and tie at Rory’s.

“Yeah, this town’s pretty sweet,” Fjordan said, brandishing a screwdriver he’d brought with him. “Want me to make it officially yours?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Avery handed him the doorknob.

“If you stick around you’re gonna want a boat,” Fjordan said, kneeling to replace the doorknob. He had the old one off in a trice and handed it to Avery. “You can get most places in town on foot, but one or two do require water transport, including the best restaurant in town, the Double Take.”

“They have good food?”

“The best. The chefs are geniuses and you can tell them I said so even though it’ll make their heads that big, we’ll never get them through another door.”

Avery laughed.

“Speaking of doors, now they'd have to knock to get through yours. Welcome home.” Fjordan stood and handed him the key.

Avery stood looking at the key in his hand, a lump in his throat. He had his own place, his and Seth's. “Uh, thanks,” he said after a bit. He looked up to see the Irishman smiling at him. Fee’s eyes were the same intense light blue as a wolf’s. Avery noticed for the first time how young Fee was, not much older than he was, and how almost pretty his features were. Seth was right: people saw the look as a whole rather than the individual. Fee’s whole demeanor said feisty punk rocker, not fresh faced kid, so that's what Avery had noticed.

“Kind of a big deal, getting your own place, yeah?”

Avery nodded.

“Yeah, was for me as well.”

“You live with Kiver, right?”

“Yes, I do,” Fjordan said with a soft smile.

“She seems real nice.”

Fee’s smile grew. “She's the best thing that ever happened to me.”

“How did you end up here? Seems like a long way from Ireland.”

“That it is. I inherited a house from my uncle.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah, that was pretty much my reaction, too.”

Avery laughed.

“Met Kiver my first day. Been together ever since.”

“So, love at first sight?”

“Well, lust anyway. Have you seen her?” Fee got a dreamy look on his face.

“She's a bit ... Terrifying.”

Fee laughed. “Yeah, that too. I always thought I preferred blokes but turns out I also have a thing for women who can break me in half.”

Avery laughed.

“But yeah, I love her something awful. We're going to be married.”

“Congratulations.”

“Thanks.” Fee smiled happily.

“I didn't think trolls did that.”

“Not generally, no.”

Avery wasn't about to ask what Fee’s relationship with Magnus was. None of his business. “Rory mentioned you took the kids house hunting. Did they find a place?”

“Yes, they did, in kid town.”

“Kid town?”

“Yeah, not sure what the official name is but only kids live there and adults are not generally welcome. They were already making friends when I left.”

“Oh. Good. Thanks for suggesting they move here. I'd have worried about them on their own in the city.”

Fee nodded. “They'd probably have been OK, but here is better.”

“They're just little kids.”

“Troll culture was hard for me to get used to, too. Some of those kids are so tiny you just want to protect them. But treating them like human kids is a mistake. It'd be like taking in a baby tiger and expecting it to act like a tabby cat.”

“I guess.”

Fee was smiling at him. “Handsome and compassionate too. Seth's a lucky man.”

Avery shrugged. “Maybe. It's not really like that.”

“Suit yourself.” The smile remained.

“I should let him know about this place.” Avery felt a small cloud pass over his happiness. Four years in and he still wasn’t sure exactly where he stood with Seth.

“Right, yes, of course.” Fee made an attempt to change his expression.

“But first I'd like to furnish it a bit.” He hoped $178 would stretch far in this town, because they needed to be here awhile, at least until Seth healed. He supposed he could get a job. He didn’t want to steal from anyone he’d met here. Everyone had been so great to them and that would be a shitty way to repay their kindness.

“Come with me. I know just the place.” 

They locked up and returned to the car.

Fjordan picked up a fresh toothpick and looked at it in disgust. “God, I miss smoking.”

Avery nodded as he buckled himself in. “I’ve been tempted to try it once or twice but then I remind myself that being able to run like a jackrabbit has literally saved my life on more than one occasion.” He stopped and hit himself mentally. Rookie mistake, Grey. You just revealed something about yourself.

Fjordan nodded, laughed a bit. “You and Andreas both.”

“Who’s Andreas?”

“Troll who lives in town. I call them Rabbit because they outran a pit bull.”

“Holy shit.”

“Yeah.” Fjordan started the car, looking over his shoulder as he backed up and turned around. “Had to steal Fizbee’s boat to get away. She wasn’t best pleased.”

“Who’s Fizbee?”

“Owner of the store we’re about to visit, matesprit to Draygo--he’s the town boss--and pretty much the person who runs the town’s economy.” Fjordan grinned. “Also, she’s a hoot.”

Avery smiled.

“She’s probably gonna look you over like you’re dessert. Just a warning. Also, I tend to call her her but her pronouns are all over the place. She answers to anything.”

Avery nodded. “There’s a town boss?”

“Yeah. Town doesn’t run itself.”

“How’d he get to be boss?”

“He got here first.” Fee grinned. “And, everyone likes him.”

“Huh.” Avery’s mind conjured images of a friendly troll mafioso in a striped suit.

“Sorry if I was out of line earlier,” Fjordan said, frowning at the toothpick before sticking it in his mouth. “None of my business what your relationship is.”

Avery shrugged, looked out the window.

“He was ready to go and find you with broken hands, busted ribs, and a nonworking face, for what it’s worth. Rory called me instead.”

Avery glanced at him. Nodded. “I’d do the same for him.”

“So, that’s gotta count for something.”

Avery nodded again.

“And, I’ll be shutting up now. I have a bad habit of trying to help other people with their problems when I’ve got plenty of my own.”

“It’s OK.” Avery realized it was. Fjordan seemed to be a really nice guy, and Avery had learned to appreciate those when he found them.

“You two should stick around. I’m not saying you’ll never have to run for your life again, but you’ll have someone to call for backup if you do.”

“Caught that, did you.”

“Steel trap over here. Also, I’m a licensed PI. It’s my job to pay attention to what people say.”

“Aren’t you a little young?”

“Minimum age is 25. I turned that in March.” Fee grinned at him. “I’ve been licensed since April.”

“Wow. Well, you’re good at it. How did you find me, anyway?”

“I asked around the kids’ network. Every town with trolls has one. Paid off a bunch of kiddos until I found yours, but DPW pulled a fucking gun on me.”

“DPW?”

“I gave him that nickname. He digs it.”

Avery laughed. “So you just surrendered?”

Fee glanced over at him. “It was a crappy gun held by a ten year old who had no fucking idea what he was doing. Surrender seemed safest for all concerned.”

“You’re a nice guy, Fjordan.”

Fjordan smiled. “Thanks. Anyway, I meant it. You two would fit right in, and your, shall we say, varied pasts will only be an asset around here. This town lives by the seat of its pants. We can use people who can think on their feet.”

“You figured all that out?” Avery was too surprised to be cagey.

“People don’t normally try to turn people into hamburger with no provocation. You have a thousand dollar suit and nothing else between you that I can tell.”

“I have a little money.”

“Good for you. Still doesn’t change my opinion. You were hiding out with children in a basement in the worst part of town.”

“OK, fair.”

“Doesn’t take a genius to figure out you two live by your wits. Nothing wrong with that. Most people in town have similar stories. Makes the town a very interesting place in my humble opinion.”

Avery nodded, liking the sound of this town more and more. “We need to stick around for the short term at the very least. Seth needs to rest. And, then we’ll see.”

Fjordan nodded. “Fair enough.” He pulled into the parking lot of a large cement box of a building that sat on some of the only high ground in town, overlooking the river. The side of the building facing the road appeared to be entirely sequins, except for an area that was painted with a symbol that looked like part of a gear. An over-decorated VW bug sat in the far corner of the lot. He got out of the car. “Voila. Fizbee’s Emporium, where you can get anything you need as long as they have it.”

Avery laughed. “Thanks for driving.”

“No problem. When we’re done here I’ll take you to the Piggly Wiggly so you can get some supplies.”

“They still have Piggly Wiggly’s?”

“Apparently at least one.”

The troll sitting behind the wraparound front counter of the store looked up as the bell tinkled their arrival. She/he/they was tiny, the smallest adult troll Avery had met yet, with a trim little figure and a poufy bob of white hair. Her ears looked like Magnus’s, reminiscent of a sea monster, but they were much more delicate and not torn. Her horns were enormous, like a big horn sheep’s but curling even farther around her head so they hung in front of her face, pointing at the tops of her ears. They were adorned with several rhinestone bracelets. She wore white plastic sunglasses in the shape of hearts, studded with pink rhinestones, and matching clip-on dangly earrings and several large rings on her hands. Her outfit was a more or less modest 60’s style two-piece pink swimsuit with dolphins on it under a clear plastic raincoat trimmed with white marabou. Her feet were on the counter: they were small enough to fit into a pair of clear plastic slides with white marabou feathers on them. She was perched on a basket chair, the cushion of which seemed to be made entirely of lilac fuzz. She was dazzling and ridiculous all at once. 

“Fee-yooor-dan!” She hopped to her feet and slid over the counter to embrace him. The chair tipped over. Avery saw that the pouf at the end of her tail was white like her hair. “I missed you,” she said, peppering his face with kisses. She talked with a pronounced lisp.

“You saw me last night,” he said, laughing.

“I know! It’s been so long!”

Fjordan chuckled and kissed her.

“And who is this?” She lowered her glasses to get a better look at Avery. Her eyes were purple.

Fee had been right. Avery felt exactly like a brownie sundae.

“Fizbee Maunders, meet Avery Grey,” Fee said. From the way Fizbee had greeted and was now draped around Fee it seemed their relationship was on the very friendly side. Avery, amused, wondered if there was anyone in this town Fjordan wasn’t fucking.

“Hi.” He waved at her.

“Oh, you’re adorable.”

“Avery’s actually furnishing an apartment today,” Fee told Fizbee. “For him and his boyfriend.”

“Ooh, moving in?”

“Possibly. For a while, anyway.” Avery said.

“Is your boyfriend as delicious as you?”

“Normally, he’s the good looking one.” Avery smiled.

“Normally?”

“Someone tried to turn the poor boy into hamburger,” Fee told her.

She winced. “Well, have a look around, carts are over there. And don’t sell yourself short, sweetcakes.” She winked at him. “You’re plenty yummy.”

He laughed, and went to get a cart. Fjordan mosied along behind him.

“Want some company? I know where most things are.”

“Sure.”

Fjordan ended up driving the cart, standing on the back and pushing with one combat-booted foot, leaning on the handlebars as he did so.

The merchandise for sale ran the gamut from fairly ordinary to what the hell. Avery held up a tschotske made of seashells that was possibly the ugliest thing he’d ever seen. “Why?”

“Another man’s treasure and all. You’d be surprised at what people’ll buy.” 

“I just … there’s no excuse for that.”

Fjordan laughed. “Getting no arguments from me. Mind you, I have very little room to talk. I have bought a few things that some might find questionable.”

Avery smiled, setting the item down. “Oh, yeah? Like what?”

“Like a piana that turns a corner.”

“Wh--how?”

“You’ll have to come over and see.” He grinned. “I admit that some things I buy just to see the look on Magnus’s face. I do adore annoying that man.”

“So .. I mean, it’s none of my business.”

“You can ask.”

“You two are pitch, then? Is that the word?”

“Uh, sorta. It’s complicated.”

Avery nodded. “Yeah, I get that one.” He rifled through the trouser selection and managed to find a couple of pairs of jeans in his and Seth’s size. One pair had a shredded knee but hey, you’d pay extra for that at a boutique.

“I mess with the poor bloke’s quadrants, but it’s good for him.” 

Avery glanced at him. He was smiling. Avery smiled a bit in return and went to look for shirts. He still had to buy housewares and didn’t want to blow it all on clothes. “I feel like I mess with Seth’s entire life.”

“Good.”

Avery looked at him in surprise. “How is that good?”

“Life is supposed to be messy, luv. Too neat and tidy isn’t good for anyone.”

“Interesting theory.” He smiled as he pulled out a plain grey t-shirt for Seth and put it into the cart. A pink one caught his eye and he held it up. It had a kitten on it hanging from a tree. It was in his size. The price was one dollar and it was in pretty good shape, if a bit faded. He shrugged and tossed it into the cart.

“People tend toward order, you see. Most of them anyway. Make sense out of things, yeah? So, if your life’s all tidy and sorted what is there to do but become dissatisfied with that? Find nits to pick, or worse, butt into other people’s lives? My Aunt Bridget was like that. No excitement in her life so she had to stir up other people’s, and let me tell you she was one unpleasant woman.”

“She dead now?”

“Probably not. I just don’t have to deal with her anymore. She’s back in Belfast, where the weather matches her soul: cold and rainy.”

Avery laughed.

“Not that I mind a little rain.” He smiled.

Avery found a couple of short sleeved button-down shirts that looked OK and tossed them in, too. “Can you show me where to find bedding?”

“This way.” Fjordan steered the cart around the store and Avery followed, glancing at some of the things on the shelves. A red shag toilet seat cover made him shudder. “If you want something nicer I can drive you to Morgan City sometime soon. They have a department store. It’s like 30 miles from here.”

“Well, I’m a bit broke right now so I think this is more in our range. But, thanks. May take you up on that at some point.”

“Magnus orders from catalogs, but I think they’re a bit pricey.”

“Probably, yeah.”

“His place looks nice, though.”

“I’ll bet. He dresses like a guy with taste.”

“That he does.” Another fond smile crossed Fee’s face.

“You’re in love with this whole town, aren’t you.”

Fee looked at him and gave him a very nice smile. “You’d make a good detective. Yeah, I am, though Kiver and Magnus hold special places in my heart.”

“That’s really … nice.” Avery felt something in himself settle quietly. He realized how awesome it would would be if Fjordan’s assessment of this town was accurate, if here, finally, was a place where he didn’t have to be on constant vigilance. He realized he’d been talking with this man like he was a friend and he’d only just met him. He glanced at Fjordan, who was taking the cart for a ride down the aisle. It crashed into a display of pillows and set them flying. The metal shelf they were on tipped over and went crashing to the floor, knocking over a nearby table and chair set.

“FJORDAN!” Fizbee hollered. “Were you riding that cart around again?”

“Sorry, Fizz, I’ll clean it up.” Fee grinned at Avery, who went to help him, Avery thinking that this guy was either exactly who he seemed or one hell of a con artist. Everyone seemed to like him, which was another point in his favor. Unless the entire town was in on the con, this place might just be Swamp-ri La.

Fjordan helped Avery find some serviceable things for the apartment, including one pot, a handful of dishes and flatware, a couple of ratty towels, some very old sheets, and an orange comforter with what looked like a wanted poster on it in black and white. Fjordan laughed for a full minute at Avery’s expression as he held it up. 

“Oh my god your face,” Fjordan wheezed. 

“What the hell is this a picture of anyway?” It had closeups of three angry looking men in what looked like their mug shots, arranged vertically.

“Movie poster?” Fjordan hazarded.

“Maybe.” Avery tossed it in the cart. “It’s the only one here, so.”

He grabbed a few more items that looked useful and headed for the front.

“I can give you a good deal on a television if you want one,” Fizbee said as she rang him up. “This one bought two dozen when I was on vacation.” She indicated Fjordan.

“Like you wouldn’t have. You know he needed the money to fix his truck.”

She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, yeah.”

“How much for the television?” Avery thought Seth might appreciate one while he got better and they could always trade it back in later

“Well, seeing as they ain’t moving like hotcakes I could give it to you for forty bucks,” she said.

“And how much for all of this?”

She finished ringing it up. “Fifty-two dollars.”

“OK, I’ll take the TV then, too. Though, dangit, was going to check if you had a microwave.”

“I saw one for ten bucks,” Fjordan said.

“Does it work?”

“If I sell it, it works, and if it doesn’t I’ll refund your money,” Fizbee said, a bit acerbically.

He held up his hands. “Didn’t mean to cast aspersions.”

“Don’t sweat it, honey.” He seemed to be immediately forgiven.

“OK, thanks. I think that might be useful since Seth’s hands are all busted up.”

“I’ll go get it,” Fjordan said.

“I’ll give you the lot for a hundred bucks,” Fizbee said. “And the TV has a remote so your sweetie can change the channels while he rests up.” She dug in a drawer and held out two batteries. “On the house.”

Avery nodded and pocketed the batteries before handing over the money, smiling a bit.

“Stop by anytime,” Fizbee trilled as Fjordan helped Avery carry everything to the car.

“Does this town have a laundromat?” Avery asked as they got in.

“Sure does, downtown.”

“I feel like I should wash some of these things.”

“Yeah, good idea. Tell you what, let’s do the Piggle du Wiggle, drop everything off, and then you can use that new basket you just bought to bring your laundry to the mat. I can drop you off there. It’s within easy walking distance of Rory’s, or just call me.”

“I don’t have a phone.”

“Oh, shit, that’s right. Well, if you do decide to stick around Draygo can get you a couple. Otherwise you’re gonna have to go to Morgan City. You won’t find any for sale here.”

Avery nodded. “I think we’ll be OK for now.” He planned to walk to the new place after the laundromat, make it look nice before showing it to Seth, nice being a relative term. He felt nervous, afraid that maybe Seth wouldn’t like it.

About an hour later Avery was sitting at the laundromat, watching his new clothes and linens go round in the washer. The Piggly Wiggly was sadly understocked but did sell soap powder and toilet paper, among other items. The produce selection, however, was abysmal and the only meat was of the preserved variety. Fjordan told him most people grew their own veg and fished, or bought from the local butcher’s across the square. Avery did manage to nab a frozen pizza and some decent looking sandwich fixings. He was glad to discover the laundry was free. After all that shopping he was down to $32.50. He couldn’t have bought those phones even if they were available, let alone pay the service bill. He wondered how you did that in this town anyway.

As he sat there musing a rustblood troll walked in and looked about furtively, holding a basket of laundry. As Avery watched the troll dumped his clothes in the washer and then added--Avery squinted--yep, cake mix.

“That’s not--” Avery began.

The troll glared at him. “Mind yer business.”

Avery held up his hands. He could mind his business. Wasn’t his laundromat. The machine would probably be fine, anyway. It was the clothes he wasn’t so sure about.

He walked home afterward and changed into the ripped jeans and a brown plaid shirt, saving the blue one for Seth. Made the bed, hung the towels, folded their clothes and put them in a kitchen cupboard since there was no dresser. Left a set of clothes out for Seth. They were going to need underwear but there was no way he was buying that used. Commando it was for now. The dishes and sundries were already put away. There wasn’t much to do because they didn’t have much. He realized his heart was pounding. He wasn’t sure why it mattered so much that Seth liked this place, but it did. He locked up and walked to Rory’s barefoot, carrying Seth’s new jeans and the other button-up shirt. His feet needed a break from those shoes. Add decent shoes to the list of things they still needed. Maybe he shouldn’t have gotten the television.

He knocked on Rory’s front door. After a long wait the door opened and Seth stood there, looking bleary eyed.

“Hi Honey, I’m home,” Avery said

Seth snorted and let him in.

Avery turned to look at him. “How are you feeling?”

Seth yawned and rubbed his head with his less-bandaged hand. “A little better. Bored. Guess that’s a good sign.”

“I brought you clothes.” Avery held the pile up.

“Thanks. I see you got some too. Nice trendy knee.”

Avery laughed. “Yeah, not a lot of selection.”

“Makes your ass look nice though.”

Avery looked behind him. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Seth smiled. “You hungry? Rory left us a frozen pizza.”

“Yeah, actually. I can make it.”

“Probably for the best.” Seth held up his bandaged hands. 

They went to the kitchen. Avery set the clothes on the table and went to get the pizza.

“I, uh, found us a place.”

“Yeah?” 

“Want a drink?”

“Water’d be great.”

Avery preheated the oven per the package instructions and brought them each some water. He sat down across from Seth. “It’s a nice place. It has a balcony overlooking the river and a roof patio, though I didn’t check that out yet.”

“Cool.”

“It was furnished, too, though I had to buy bedding and such. I’m afraid we’re mostly broke now.”

“How much is left?”

“Thirty-two fifty.” 

Seth nodded. “Yep. We’re broke.” He laughed.

“I got you a TV. It was a bit of a splurge but I thought it’d keep you from going stir crazy. We can probably sell it later.”

“Thanks, Avery. That was thoughtful.”

Avery nodded and sipped his water. He felt antsy. Seth was being nice but he was still afraid to say what was on his mind. “Fee’s real nice. He drove me around and helped me find stuff at Fizbee’s.”

“The thrift store, right?”

“Yeah. She’s uh, intense.”

Seth laughed. “Fizbee?”

“Yeah. I mean, in a good way. I liked her. I’ve liked everyone here.”

Seth nodded, drank his water. He was still having difficulty with things that required his hands. “So, what’s up, Avery.”

Avery looked at him. “That obvious, huh.”

Seth smiled slightly. “What do you think.”

Avery sighed. “I want to give this place a chance. I think we--you--might have stumbled onto what we’ve been daydreaming about. Fee told me, I mean, not point blank, but he told me that nearly everyone here has a criminal past and that our talents could be put to good use. It feels like a place where we don’t have to lie about who we are or what we’ve done or how we feel about each other. No one gives a shit.”

The stove beeped that it was ready for the pizza and Avery hopped up to put it in. Returning to the table he said, “At the very least I could get a job for now, try to earn some money since we don’t have any. See how that goes.”

Seth nodded. “OK.”

“OK?” Avery felt enormous relief.

“OK. I mean, I have to recover anyway but I’ll give it a chance beyond that. Let’s assume we’re staying, see how it feels.”

Avery nodded, looked down at the table, wiped away imaginary dust. He felt Seth watching him and looked up again. “I-if you decide at some point you want to leave I’ll go with you, no regrets.” He looked down again. He couldn’t bring himself to say that he’d rather be in Hell with Seth than in Paradise without him.

“Avery,” Seth said after a minute. 

Avery looked up. There was a long moment when they just looked at one another.

“I don’t want to lose you again, either,” Seth said finally.


	9. Keep On Truckin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You know what homophobia really means, right, pal?” Seth said.

Chapter Nine

1989  
St. Louis, Missouri

“Do you think they saw us?” Avery asked as he and Seth hurried down an alley and onto a busy sidewalk. Helen had insisted on buying them bus tickets so Seth had chosen St. Louis. They’d arrived at the station to find a pair of cops who were questioning some of the passengers. They’d slipped quickly out the back entrance.

Seth picked a direction and kept walking. “Hard to say.”

“Wonder what they were looking for.”

“Probably not us, but it could have gotten awkward, even with your new fake ID.”

Avery nodded, looking around. It was noon on a weekday and the sidewalk was full of people, probably on their way to lunch. He yawned. It was a grey overcast day. The bus ride had been long and they were both too tall to sleep comfortably in the cramped seats. They’d taken turns leaning on each other but Seth’s shoulder made for an uncomfortably bony pillow. “So what now?”

“Hop a freight to anywhere, then head south I think,” Seth said. “See if we can find the bayou town of our dreams.”

Avery nodded. “Could we get food first?”

Seth laughed. “Yes.”

The McDonald’s was packed but they found a table next to a younger white guy who was sitting alone, hunched over his burger and fries. He was skinny and had light brown hair and a moustache. He wore a brown windbreaker and blue jeans. A table of three large high school kids, also white, in matching letter jackets was sitting behind him, laughing. One of them spit a wad of straw wrapper through a straw. It stuck in the guy’s hair. He seemed too cowed to react.

“Knock it off,” Seth said.

“Hey, Todd, check it, more fags. It’s an infestation,” one of the boys said. He had slicked back dark hair and a sneering expression.

“You know what homophobia really means, right, pal?” Seth said.

“I ain’t your pal, pal,” Todd’s friend said.

Seth smirked. “Nice comeback.”

“Why don’t you mind your own business?”

“Why don’t you mind yours?” Seth said. “This man is just trying to enjoy his lunch.”

“Well he should have picked the fag McDonald’s then.”

“That ...doesn’t make any sense,” Seth said, taking a bite of his burger.

Avery snort laughed. “This must be the asshole McDonald’s.”

Seth giggled.

“Think you’re funny do you?” the guy said. “We’ll see how funny you are with my fist in your face.”

Avery looked at him. “Buy me dinner first.”

“Fuck you.”

“You’re not my type.” Avery turned back to his food.

The guy stood up and moved to throw Avery’s food on the floor but Seth’s arm shot out and stopped him. 

“He’s still eating that,” Seth said, mildly.

The guy with the mustache finished eating and got up. The other two teenagers got up and followed him. The one at Seth and Avery’s table looked torn.

“This is your lucky day, assholes,” he said, turning to follow his friends.

Seth sighed. “Apparently not. Come on, Avery, we’d better go help that guy.”

Avery nodded and shoved the last of his sandwich in his mouth before going to throw out his trash. He hurried after Seth and out into the street.

The boys were running after the man, whooping and hollering. Seth chased after them, Avery on his heels, in time to see the man hop into a pickup truck and take off. Seth skidded to a halt and did an about face. Avery turned around too, glancing over his shoulder. The three boys had stopped and were looking around. One of them pointed straight at Avery.

“Run,” he told Seth. “They saw us.”

They ran, dodging between people on the street, the other boys in hot pursuit. 

They reached an intersection and a pickup truck slammed to a halt in front of them. The door opened and the mustached man was gesturing to them from the driver’s seat.

“Get in!”

They did. Avery jumped in first and Seth had barely slammed the door when the guy took off, leaving the three jocks looking frustrated on the sidewalk. One of them had his hands on his knees. 

The inside of the truck smelled like cigarettes. Southern rock music played softly on the radio.

“Had to go and play the heroes,” Mustache said. “Not that I don’t appreciate it, boys, but the only thanks you’ll get for that is a hospital bill.”

“You were outnumbered,” Seth said, shrugging.

The man nodded. “That I was. Name’s Rick by the way.” He lit a cigarette, rolling down the window to blow out the smoke.

“I’m Seth. This is Avery.”

“Nice to meet you. Anyplace in particular I can drop you?”

“We hadn’t gotten around to finding accommodations yet,” Seth said. “Know any good cheap motels?”

“Sure, kid, I know one or two if you don’t mind them a little sleazy, but I could also just take you to the Holiday Inn.”

“Sleazy’s OK. We’re broke,” Seth said.

‘Yeah, wish I could help you out but so am I. OK, you just watch your back, OK? Not a nice part of town.”

Seth nodded.

“Why’d you let those guys push you around?” Avery asked. 

Seth gave him a look.

“What? I mean, they’re just dumb kids.”

“Exactly,” Rick said. “They’re kids and I’m 24 years old and a known member of the local gay community. How do you think a confrontation would go over with the police?”

“Oh.”

Rick nodded. “Yeah.”

“Sorry, that sucks.”

Rick shrugged. “I don’t run into that problem often. For what it’s worth, you two were funny.” He tapped out some ash in a Coke can in the truck’s beverage holder.

Seth smiled. “Thanks.” He looked at Avery. “Buy me dinner first?”

Avery smiled.

“Fucking hilarious.”

“Yeah, well, you were the badass. You were all, he’s not done eating.”

“You liked that, huh.” Seth gave him a sideways smile.

“Yeah.” Avery blushed a little.

Rick snorted. “You two are so cute I’m gonna get diabetes.” As he drove, the buildings started to look more rundown. Paper blew down the street like tumbleweeds. “Welcome to the sleazy part of town. Everything’s gone to shit since the blacks and Mexicans moved in.”

Avery felt Seth stiffen beside him.

“You don’t honestly blame it on them,” Seth said.

“Nah, you’re right. It’s more the trolls. Filthy fuckers.”

“You know what? You can let us out here.” 

“Fuck.” Rick turned to look at him. “You’re one of them liberals, aren’t you.”

“If being a liberal means I don’t blame poverty on the poor then yes, you got me. Let us out.”

Rick stopped the truck and they hopped out. “This isn’t a real safe part of town,” he said.

“We’ll be fine,” Seth said, and started walking. Avery trotted after him.

“Suit yourselves. Stupid kids.” Rick drove off. 

Seth didn’t speak for a while and Avery left him to his thoughts. There was no one around at the moment. The neighborhood felt like a ghost town. They walked past abandoned buildings and the occasional business. 

As they walked the sky, which had threatened rain all day, opened up. Big fat drops turned to a deluge and soon the boys were soaked. Avery glanced at Seth, who was still walking resolutely forward, his thoughts apparently turned inward.

Avery didn’t really mind it, walking in the rain next to his friend. He wasn’t too hungry, he was tired but he could deal, and they had no dilemma ahead of them other than finding a place to spend the night. He looked up, holding out his hands, and spun around, smiling at Seth, which earned him a slight chuckle.

They passed a truckstop. Two trucks were parked off to the side, their drivers apparently inside, staying out of the now pelting rain. Seth pointed at one truck: it was a flatbed with a cage filled high with bales of hay. He waggled his eyebrows at Avery, who laughed, and before Avery knew what was happening Seth was scaling the side of the truck on the side away from the truck stop. Avery had no choice but to follow. The hay was covered on top with a clear plastic tarp: He looked up and saw Seth’s feet disappearing under it. Avery followed, the hay picking at his hands but making it easy to climb. He tunneled under the tarp to find Seth rearranging some of the hay, giving them room for a nest. 

Seth put the suitcase under his head like a pillow. It was hard sided but he didn’t seem to find it uncomfortable. Avery climbed in put his head next to his and lay flat on his back. They were completely drenched. 

Seth started to laugh and Avery joined in. 

“Whooooo!”

Avery looked at him and grinned.

Seth rolled over and kissed him, pulling him toward him so they lay side by side, his hand moving up inside his shirt. Avery’s breath caught in his throat as he kissed him back. He felt free. They were on their way to who cares where with no one to answer to but themselves. He grinned at Seth around the kiss and got an answering smile. Seth’s hand felt nice and warm on his back. The hay prickled his side and back but he didn’t care.

“This is nice,” he said.

Seth smiled. “Yeah, pretty sweet.”

“What was Rick’s deal, I wonder.”

Seth scowled. “Guys like him are the worst kind of hypocrite. He knows what it’s like to be oppressed but still thinks it’s OK for others.”

“Yeah. Sorry I brought it up.”

“It’s OK,” Seth rolled over on his back and looked up at the rain. “I just, I was suddenly home again, you know? Surrounded by people who talked like that all the time over champagne and caviar.”

“Your grandparents are rich, huh.”

Seth nodded. 

“Yeah, my parents, too.” Avery propped himself up on his elbow to look at him.

“I gathered that from the fact that your dad funds casinos,” Seth said dryly, glancing at him.

Avery laughed. “Yeah. Right. Kind of a giveaway.”

“Sort of, yeah.”

“Yeah,” Avery said. “Can we go back to kissing?”

“You’re the one who brought it up,” Seth said, amused, but rolled over and kissed him.

The truck engine started up. Avery could feel the vibrations ever so slightly through several layers of hay as the trucker drove off, unaware of his extra cargo. Above them the view remained the same: just driving rain and grey sky. He felt a little cold from being wet but Seth felt warm against him. Avery dozed off after a while, lulled by the motion of the truck and tired from poor sleep the night before, Seth’s arms around him and the dissipating rain above.

When he woke it was night. The truck had stopped, as had the rain. Seth was asleep beside him.

“Seth,” he whispered. “Wake up. We’ve stopped.”

“Mmmmm.” Seth opened his eyes.

“What should we--”

“Shhh. I’m trying to listen.”

Avery fell silent. All he could hear was crickets.

“Let’s go,” Seth said. “You first, but go backwards so you can climb down.”

Avery nodded. His T-shirt rode up and the hay scratched his stomach as he wiggled backwards underneath the tarp. Once he felt air under his legs he lowered them slowly and half slid, half climbed the rest of the way down. He pulled his shirt down, noticing there were now angry red scratches on his belly. Seth was in the process of climbing down, the suitcase in his hand. 

Avery reached up. “Hand me the suitcase.”

“Nah, I’m fine.” Seth jumped the rest of the way down and landed like a cat.

Avery looked around. They were in a fenced parking lot next to a set of tall white buildings that looked like silos, with a short building in front, also painted white. The building had its night time lights on and the sign on the door said Sorry We’re Closed.

“Where are we?”

“Feed yard,” Seth said. “Trucker must have got here after hours.”

“Where’d he go?”

Seth put his fingers to his lips. “Shh. He’s probably sleeping in the cab,” he whispered, pointing to the truck cab, which was still attached.

“Oh.”

“Let’s go before he notices us,” Seth said, taking off across the yard and climbing easily over the fence. 

Avery followed. They were on a paved country road with a muddy shoulder. Seth walked on the left side of the pavement and Avery hurried to catch up.

“Wonder where we are,” Avery said. 

Seth looked around. “Middle of nowhere’s my best guess. Hopefully we’ll see a sign to somewhere at some point.”

Avery nodded. “Guess we’re walking.”

“Looks like.”

Walking was OK with Avery. He’d gotten enough sleep on the truck. He just wished he wasn’t so hungry.

“Do we have any food?” he asked.

Seth stopped and opened the suitcase, holding it on his arm like a tray. He tossed Avery a stick of beef jerky and took one for himself before closing the case. “We’ve got just a couple more of these, and some pretzels, so make it last.”

Avery nodded. “Thank you.” He unwrapped it quickly and took a bite.

“Yeah, sorry, I should have stocked up more.”

“Next chance we get.”

“Agreed.”

They walked along eating the jerky. It was salty so they shared water from the thermos Seth kept in the suitcase. 

“That was delicious, garcon. My compliments to the chef.” 

Seth snorted. “Glad you like my cooking.”

Avery laughed. “This is OK, you know?”

“What is?”

“Just … walking. Not knowing where we are but you know, we’re fine, we’re free, we’ve got nowhere to be. It’s … OK.”

Seth smiled. “Yeah, it is.”

“So, I gotta ask,” Avery said as they walked along, “What’s with the suitcase? Have you never heard of a backpack?”

“It’s classier.”

Avery looked at him. 

“What? It is.”

Avery laughed. “You’re kind of a snob sometimes.”

Seth shrugged. “I prefer to think of myself as a gentleman with taste.”

Avery giggled. “Snob.” At the same time he said it, though, he realized how much he liked the way “gentleman with taste” rolled out in Seth’s sexy southern drawl.

Seth rolled his eyes.

“Hey,” Avery said, after they’d walked some more, “that looks like a sign up ahead.”

Seth peered into the darkness. A reflective sign on a thin post stood along the side of the road about a quarter of a mile away. “So it does.”

As they approached they saw it said Enoch 5. 

“Cool,” Seth said. “Five miles is nothing.”

“Enoch may be nothing.”

“Hey, don’t malign the fine town of Enoch.”

Avery laughed. “If it has a place to sleep and some sort of food I promise to take it all back.”

They walked for a bit.

“How are your knees?” Seth asked. 

“Mostly better, thanks.” 

“Good.”

Avery smiled.

Seth gave him the side eye and smiled, too. “You’re so easy.”

“What?”

“Happy little puppy because I asked how you were.”

Avery shrugged. He put his hands in his pockets, his happiness fading.

“I’m sorry,” Seth said, after a moment. “I didn’t mean that in a mean way.”

Avery shrugged again, feeling dumb. He kicked at a stone in the road.

“Avery, I like that you’re like that. I’m sorry I hurt your feelings.”

“I’m not dumb,” Avery said, not looking at him. Panic rose unbidden in his throat. He wasn’t dumb.

“Hell, no, you’re not. Who beat me at poker?”

“Me.”

“Damn straight.” Seth put his arm around Avery’s shoulders and kissed the side of his head. “You’re smart and cute as hell.”

Avery rolled his eyes. “OK. You can stop.”

“Maybe I don’t want to. I didn’t mean you were dumb, Avery. I just … I think you’re sweet.”

“Sweet.”

“Yeah.”

“That’s almost as bad.”

“How so?”

“Little old ladies are sweet. Baby duckies are sweet.”

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t have sex with either of them.”

Avery snort laughed. “God, I would hope not.”

Seth smiled. “Anyway, it’s not an insult. Or, I didn’t mean it to be.”

Avery nodded. They walked for a while without speaking. His thoughts were jumbled. Had Seth just admitted he had feelings for him? He certainly seemed to care that he’d hurt Avery’s. “My father used to tell me I was dumb,” he said finally, trying to explain. “I guess it’s a sore spot.”

“I’m sorry,” Seth said after a pause. “That really sucks. But your father, as we’ve already established, is an asshole. Whereas I am … “

“A heartless bastard?” Avery asked, trying to lighten the mood.

Seth laughed shortly. “Well, yes. Sometimes. But I was going to say, I’m your friend.”

“My friend.” If Avery had been looking for a declaration of love, this wasn’t it. But the way Seth said it made him feel like it meant something.

Seth took his hand and squeezed it lightly. “Yes.”

Avery nodded. “All right. All right.” If friendship was all Seth felt, or would admit to, that was fine. Avery had never had a real friend, and he reminded himself that he’d known Seth all of two weeks, not even.

He couldn’t reasonably expect the guy to fall in love this fast just because he had.


	10. Boston, Msaeachubaets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Do you feel like you missed out on being a kid?” Seth asked, watching the direction of his gaze.

Chapter Ten

1993  
Mynah’s Creek  
Later That Day

“This is so undignified.” Seth crossed his arms as, surrounded by green light, he floated up the stairs. He was upright, wearing the jeans and shirt Avery had brought him. Rory had given him the Bugs Bunny jammies as a parting gift. Avery carried them over his arm, along with the jacket and tie from his suit. 

“Oh, I dunno. You look like one of those genies.” Fjordan said, smiling as he and Avery followed Kiver.

“And beats walking up three flights with your ribs like that,” Avery pointed out.

“Yes, thank you, Kiver for that,” Seth said.

“No problem.” She set him down gently in front of their door.

“Whose idea was it to get a room on the top floor?” Seth said, a bit grouchily.

“When you see the view you’ll thank him,” Fee said.

Avery went to unlock the door.

“We’ll be off, then,” Fjordan said.

Kiver waved. 

“See you, and thanks for everything,” Avery said, turning to look at them.

“No problem, mate. You two should come to our place when you’re up for it.”

“Sounds great.”

They left. Avery looked at Seth, feeling nervous. 

“Are we going in?” Seth asked.

“Yes, right.” He opened the door.

Seth walked in first. “Good God.”

Avery followed him, heart sinking. “You hate it.”

“What? No. It’s that bedspread. Holy fuck.”

Avery laughed weakly. “It was literally the only one in the store.”

“Hard to believe anyone would pass that one up,” Seth said dryly. He was looking around.

“The bathroom has a huge tub,” Avery said. “And there’s not a dresser so I put our clothes in here.” He opened the kitchen cupboard to show him. “I bought us some food but all they had was processed shit so I hope you like ramen and hot dogs.”

“Avery.”

Avery looked at him.

“Calm down. This place is great.” 

“Yeah?” Avery rubbed the back of his head.

“Yes.”

Avery nodded, relieved. “Do you need to rest?”

Seth sighed. “Probably, but I’m sick to death of lying around. Maybe I could go sit out on the balcony.”

“They really got you bad, didn’t they.” Avery grabbed a couple of chairs and carried them through the sliding doors. It was a muggy day but not unbearably hot.

“It wasn’t fun, if that’s what you’re asking.” He sat down slowly on one of the chairs. “Thanks.”

Avery went and got them each a glass of water before sitting down next to him. Seth could flex his right hand now so could manage the mug OK. It said I’d Rather Be Golfing. Avery’s said Louisiana is for Lovers.

“Thanks for taking care of all of this,” Seth said, watching the river.

“Sure. Sorry I couldn’t afford nicer things.”

“Are you kidding? I’ve always wanted my very own I’d Rather Be Golfing mug.”

Avery smiled. “Fee says if we stay we should get a boat.” He slapped a mosquito.

“Makes sense.”

“He says there’s a real good restaurant you can only reach by water. Maybe we can get someone to take us when you feel better.”

Seth nodded. “I could go for some good food, though I’m not sure how much we’d get for $32.50.”

“I thought I’d ask Fee about a job.”

“Probably need to talk to Draygo.”

“Oh, right. He’s the town boss, right?”

“Yeah.”

Down on the river a boatful of teenagers rowed by, some troll, some human, all loud. Someone had apparently said something very funny.

“Wonder what he’s like.”

“Huge, and very forgiving.”

Avery looked at him.

“I uh, accused him of being a burglar.”

Avery laughed. Seth chuckled a little too. Down on the river one of the kids dropped an oar, which proceeded to float downstream. There was a mad scramble to retrieve it that resulted in a skinny black kid falling overboard.

“Think he’d give me a job?”

“Probably. He offered me one. Said he liked my style.”

Avery smiled. “Shows he has taste.”

The kid swam and retrieved the paddle, his friends laughing and shrieking. He swam back to the boat and they pulled him aboard. A troll girl in a pretty dress kissed him as he held the paddle aloft, triumphant.

Avery laughed a little.

“Do you feel like you missed out on being a kid?” Seth asked, watching the direction of his gaze.

“Would I have liked to have a carefree childhood? Sure. But that wasn’t what would have happened if I stayed. I’m happy with how things turned out.”

Seth nodded. “Yeah. No sense dwelling on what could have been.” He rolled his neck a little.

“Feeling stiff?”

“Yes. Be nice when I can stretch properly.”

“And anyway, we don’t know those kids, or their stories. Fee said this is where people end up. They might all be runaways too.”

Seth nodded. “What do you think of Fee?”

“I like him. I think he’s a genuinely nice person.”

Seth nodded again. “Yeah, I mean, he went to find you for free.”

“I think that’s just the way this town operates.”

Seth was still watching the river. The kids had floated out of sight, though Avery could still hear them. “Meet anyone else?”

“Other than Kiver and Rory? Uh, Fizbee, as mentioned. And Magnus. Did you meet him yet?”

“Yeah.” Seth made a wry face.

“What?”

“Oh, I just met him in my Bugs Bunny jammies and he was wearing a three-piece suit.”

Avery snorted. “I mean, you’d look good in a food sack.”

“Well, not at present, but thank you kindly just the same.”

“Anytime.” He looked at Seth. One eye was still bruised shut and his jaw was a mess but he was here, in front of him, making small talk. Seth was alive and he was beautiful. “So yeah,” he said after a long pause, “Magnus, and the three troll kids you saw us with. Oh, and this really weird dude at the laundromat.”

“Weird how?”

“He put cake mix in the washer instead of laundry powder and got very huffy with me when I tried to point that out.”

Seth started giggling.

“He was all, mind yer business.”

“So what did you do?”

“I minded my business.”

“Smart of you.”

“Don’t have to tell me twice.”

Seth giggled some more.

“You hungry? I could make our house-famous hot dogs or ramen.”

“Yeah, I could eat.”

Avery microwaved them each a couple of hotdogs and dug out a bag of chips he’d bought. He wasn’t sure if Seth preferred ketchup or mustard. He suspected neither, but he brought them both out just in case. Seth was still watching the river.

“See anything interesting?” Avery asked, handing him a plate.

“Just an egret.”

Avery looked at him.

“White wading bird.”

“Oh. Ketchup? Mustard?”

“I’m good.”

Avery smiled to himself.

Seth gave him a look.

“I called it, is all.” He added mustard and ketchup to his own hot dog and took a bite. He’d wrapped each wiener in bread because the store hadn’t sold buns. “I can’t believe we’ve never eaten hot dogs together.”

“Most places sell burgers,” Seth said, shrugging. “Hot dogs is home cooking.”

“You should sell someone that slogan,” Avery said. “Eat your wieners at home.”

Seth laughed. “Yeah, you’d get arrested for doing it in public.”

Avery nearly choked on his hot dog. “Oh my god.”

“Relax the throat,” Seth said, laughing around his hot dog.

Avery flipped him the bird once he’d recovered. “Fuck you.”

“Sorry, can’t. Doctor’s orders.”

Avery snorted. “Did he say how long you should wait?”

“Depends on my ribs,” Seth said, shrugging. “At least another week.”

“Man, that’s forever,” Avery groaned.

Seth made a face. “Tell me about it.”

Avery cleaned up after they ate and washed the dishes before rejoining Seth on the balcony. “We could use some comfy chairs for sitting out here.”

Seth nodded, looking off to the side.

“Does this make you nervous? Owning stuff?” Avery asked, guessing what he was thinking.

Seth looked at him. “A little,” he admitted after a while. “But I agreed to give this a try, and you’re right, comfy chairs would be nice.”

“I meant what I said. If you want to leave, we leave.” He sat down in the other chair, trying to ignore the lump that formed in his throat as he said this.

Seth nodded. “And you were right, too. We shouldn’t let the fact that every place we’ve been so far has been less than ideal stop us from staying when it is.”

Avery smiled, feeling hopeful again. “I do like it here. I like the people. I like the fact that this place is free. I like not having to carry everything I own around with me.”

“Well, now that we have a refrigerator that would just be impractical,” Seth drawled.

Avery laughed.

“But you’re right, we could do a lot worse,” Seth said, watching the river again. “We could be paying through the nose for a smelly closet, for starters.”

“Yeah.” Avery bit his fingernail. “I’m going to go talk to Draygo, I think. Can I get you anything while I’m out?”

“No. I think I’m going to take a nap.” Seth made a face.

“I wish you weren’t hurt, but that seems like a sensible plan. Heal up that much sooner.”

“I just hate feeling helpless,” Seth said. 

Avery nodded. “I get that.”

Seth sighed and got up. Avery followed suit.

“Oh, shit, I forgot to get you a copy of the key,” Avery said, following him inside. 

“It’s not like I’m able to go anywhere anyway,” Seth pointed out. “It’s fine.”

“I’ll get one today. Lock the door behind me so you can sleep easy.”

Seth nodded.

“Need help getting undressed?”

Seth sighed, looking down at himself. “Yeah, buttons are not my friends right now.”

Avery helped him off with his shirt and jeans. “I bought you a plain grey T-shirt. It’s in the cupboard. Might be an easier choice. Do you want your pajamas?”

“Yeah, sure. Be nice not to have to answer the door naked.”

“Underwear would be nice, huh. I need to go to Morgan City for that, though, and we’re broke.”

Seth laughed a little. “Too broke to buy undies is pretty broke.”

Avery laughed too. “Yeah. Sorry.”

“Don’t sweat it, Grey. Commando is fine.”

Avery nodded and went and got the pajamas. He helped him get dressed. Ugly bruises were forming around Seth’s ribs where he was healing. Avery supposed that was a good sign but he hated to see him like that.

Seth smiled at him, touched his shoulder. “Thank you. For all of this.”

Avery smiled back, placing his hand on his. “Sure. See you soon.” What he wanted to say was, I love you, but the words stuck in his throat. So instead he patted his pockets as Seth lay down on the bed, making sure he had his key and wallet, and sat down to put on his shoes.

“How’s the bed?”

“Pretty acceptable, actually.” Seth pulled the blanket over himself.

“Good.” He smiled. “Sweet dreams.”

Seth was already half asleep. “Yeah, yeah.”

“See you soon.” Avery switched off the light as he left, locking the door behind him.

It was early afternoon. He wasn’t sure where to find Draygo this time of day. He was counting on it not being a very big town. It occurred to him that Rory might know so he walked back to the yellow craftsman. It was a hazy day but he found he didn’t mind the heat. His heart felt lighter than it had in ages.

He didn’t encounter anyone on his walk. Most people were probably indoors, staying out of the heat. He thought one of his next purchases should be a pair of shorts. Jeans were a bit much in this weather. He reached Rory’s house soon enough, took the front steps two at a time and knocked on the door. 

No one answered. He knocked again.

“Looking for the doc?” Someone asked. He turned to see a oliveblood troll who had stopped their bicycle in the road. They wore cargo shorts, an orange, white, and green T-shirt that read Boston, Msaeachubaets, and an ugly khaki bucket hat with a lot of pins on it. The hat had holes cut in it for the troll’s horns, which were asymmetrical and stuck straight up from their head.

“Uh, actually, I was hoping to find Draygo,” Avery said, coming down the steps and crossing the lawn halfway. “I thought Rory might know where to find him.”

‘I could give you his number.” The troll’s voice was fairly high, with a slight southern accent.

“That’d be great if I had a phone,” Avery said with a laugh.

“Yeah, that’d help.” The troll chuckled. “What do you need the boss for?”

“I was hoping he’d give me a job. I’m new in town, and flat broke.”

The troll laughed, not unkindly. “I’ve been there.” They took out their phone and made a call. “Yo, Draygo. Got a human kid here who’s looking for you.” Pause. “Said he needs a job.” They laughed again. “OK, I’ll tell him.”

They hung up the phone. “He’s at St. Sedition’s,” the troll said. “That’s his bar.”

“Thank you. I”m Avery, by the way. He/him.” He crossed the yard and offered his hand, which the troll shook. They were about Avery’s height and build.

“Benny, he/him. Nice to meet you.”

“That’s quite a T-shirt you’ve got there.”

“Fizbee’s finest.”

Avery laughed. “I have a few things from there myself. A bedspread that’s gonna give us nightmares for starters.”

Benny laughed. “Yeah, you can find some real treasures there. Do you know how to get to the bar?”

“Not a clue.”

Benny gave him directions. 

“Thanks so much, I appreciate it.”

Benny smiled. “No problem. See you ‘round.” He hopped on his bicycle and rode off.

St. Sedition’s was about a twenty-minute walk from Rory’s house. It occupied a small brick building with its name in big fancy letters on the side facing the road along with a depiction of a stylized green rose. A mural of the swamp covered the wall containing the front door, which sat perpendicular to the road. The mural looked like a town effort: the art styles varied widely. Avery made out a raccoon, an alligator, and several rose bushes among the pools of water and trees. At the center was a book with a halo. The book was on fire. Avery guessed this was not a Christian establishment.

Inside the bar was cool and dark. Magnus sat at a table, smoking, and next to him sat the biggest damned troll Avery had ever seen. He felt in that moment like the errant youngest son in a fairy tale about to confront the ogre king. He cleared his throat.

The large troll lifted his head. “Hello.” His voice was deep and resonant in the small space. “You must be our job seeker.” He had hair that fell in messy ringlets around his face and wore a T-shirt. One of his ears was mostly missing.

“Uh, yes. I’m Avery Grey.”

“Oh, Seth’s friend. Glad you made it here OK.”

“Yes, thank you. I’m glad to be here.”

“How is Seth doing?”

“Still recovering, but now he has a safe place to do that in, so thank you.” His voice broke a little, mortifying him, but Draygo smiled, a nice warm fairly terrifying smile. He had teeth like a lion’s. One fang was metal. 

“So, you need a job.”

“Yes, sir.”

Draygo continued to smile. “What are your skills?”

“Um, legal skills?”

Draygo laughed. “Just tell me what you can do.”

“Uh, I’m good at sports, I’m a fast runner, I play cards pretty well, I’m good in a fight and uh, I--I’m not going to get in trouble, am I?”

Magnus snorted.

“No,” Draygo said.

“Well, I’m a pickpocket and I can open a variety of locks, though I don’t know how to do safes yet on account of they’re hard to come by casually. I, uh,” he rubbed the back of his neck, “I’m also pretty good at thinking on my feet, which I suppose is a nice way of saying I’m a good liar when the situation calls for it.” 

“I see.” Draygo seemed amused. “Any other skills?”

“I mean, I can read, do math, stuff like that, but no. I’m not much of a cook. I’m willing to do any job, though, and I’m a fast learner. I could, I don’t know, run errands, wash dishes, whatever you need.”

“Well, I could use someone to help at the library, or someone to clean up around here, wash dishes, scrub toilets, that kind of thing.”

“That second job sounds OK.” Libraries held a sour memory for Avery. He’d loved them when he was little but his dad had poisoned his love of books by mocking his choices. Avery had laughed along but hadn’t set foot in a library willingly since.

“Sounds good. To be fair, as bottom man in either location you’d probably scrub toilets regardless.”

Avery half-laughed, shrugged. “I’m willing to do what needs to be done.”

“That’s what I like to hear. You can start tonight. Stop by at 6 or so and I’ll have someone show you the ropes.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“You’re welcome. And, it’s Draygo.”

Avery nodded. “Thank you, Draygo.” He wasn’t sure how much washing dishes was going to pay but he was guessing it was more than zero and right now that sounded pretty good. “Thanks a lot.”

“See you tonight.” Draygo turned back to the books he and Magnus were working on. Magnus lit a fresh cigarette.

Avery nodded, realizing he was being dismissed, and left. Outside of the cool bar the heat felt oppressive. Some insect was making a loud steady buzzing noise. He ambled back the way he’d come. He passed a greenhouse, and a lot of trees. Looking down he realized he’d need different shoes if he didn’t want to ruin his expensive Italian loafers so when he reached the crossroad he headed toward Fizbee’s. You never knew when having a serviceable pair of fancy shoes was going to come in handy, and he figured he could find a pair of sneakers for a reasonable price. Maybe get two so Seth wouldn’t have to go barefoot.

And a key, he reminded himself, get Seth a key. Look at you, Grey, getting all domestic. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t had to run errands when they were on the road but this felt different. He was afraid of getting too used to this new feeling of having a place in the world. He liked it a lot but he was worried Seth would change his mind. He had meant it when he said he’d leave if that’s what Seth wanted, but this place was already beginning to feel like home.


	11. String Peas and Other Small Blessings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seth was a few yards ahead before he realized he was alone. “Avery,” he whispered, “where the hell are you?”

Chapter Eleven

1989  
Enoch, Kansas

By the time they reached Enoch they were starving. It was 9:30. The clerk at the hotel told them the only restaurant open that late was the bar down the street so that was where they found themselves approximately half an hour later. The place was small, brown, and undecorated, with a black cement floor and a long counter, along which sat several patrons who looked like their only reason to be there was to get very drunk. Everyone here appeared to be white. No one was watching the television.

“We don’t serve minors in here,” the bartender said, looking up from the bar. He was a short skinny guy with a ponytail.

“I’m 21,” Seth said.

“Sure you are. Get out.”

“But--” Avery said, but Seth cut him off.

“Let’s go.” They stepped back out into the night. “Sorry, I could tell we weren’t going to win that one,” Seth said when they had walked for a bit. “Let’s see if there’s a convenience store or something.”

Avery nodded glumly and tried to think of something other than food. They didn’t talk much. The town was quiet, everyone already settled into their beds apparently, with the occasional laugh track cutting the air. 

By the time they found the grocery store Avery could have eaten his own arm. The store was closed. Avery wanted to cry. 

“Fuck,” Seth said. “Let’s just go back to the hotel.” He looked around. “I think it’s that way.”

Avery nodded.

“You faggots lost?” A voice asked. Three older white teenagers were approaching them, wearing hoodies and jeans. Two of them were smoking. One of them dropped his cigarette on the ground.

“No,” Seth said, trying to walk around them. 

The one who had spoken blocked his way. “Where you going?”

Seth sighed. “I don’t have time for this.”

“Well, that’s just plain unfriendly, isn’t it, fellas.”

The other two nodded. “Yeah,” said one of them.

Seth punched the guy in the stomach. He folded like a lawn chair but before they could run for it the other two attacked. Avery jumped on the nearest one’s back and bit his ear. The guy yelped and threw him off.

“He fucking bit me!”

Avery tried to run but the guy tackled him and for a while it was all a confusion of fists and yelling. Avery threw him off of him and stood up to help Seth, who was fighting the other two. His opponent jumped on his back and Avery careened into the other fray, knocking down one of the guys as he and his passenger fell. He punched someone in the face and stood up. He didn’t feel so well. Seth’s opponent was on the ground, holding his balls. The other two charged and Avery vomited all over both of them.

“FUCK,” one of them said.

Seth grabbed Avery’s arm and pulled him away from the fight. They ran. Seth was laughing.

“Whooooo!”

Avery laughed weakly, not feeling much like celebrating, just wanting to get away. Seth was still holding his hand.

He heard the warning boop of a siren.

“Oh, fuck, the cops,” Seth said, and dragged him off down an alley. Now Avery’s heart was pounding in his throat, his mouth suddenly dry. They ran a zigzag pattern across lawns and over a fence. Seth dropped his hand and was no longer laughing. A large dog on a chain lunged at them, nearly reaching Avery, who yelped and dodged as he ran after Seth. The dog barked after them and lights went on in the house as the boys disappeared into the night.

They reached the hotel. Seth slowed up and took a look at Avery. “You’re a mess.”

Now that he’d stopped running the adrenaline was being replaced by pain. Avery tasted blood on his lip and realized his nose was bloody. Other parts of his face and body hurt as well. Seth had a split lip and a blackening eye. 

“You are, too.”

“Fuck, let’s try to sneak in the back. We’re going to have to run for it.”

Avery nodded. “Yeah.” They’d paid cash for their room but it looked like they were going to have to forfeit it. 

They found the back entrance and used their keys to open the door, hurrying to their room on the first floor. They retrieved their suitcase. The hotel was old and had windows that actually opened. Seth opened it now and said, ‘This way.”

They slipped out the window and into the night. Avery was so hungry he thought he might pass out. He was dying for a drink of water. They hurried down an alley where fenced back yards abutted the road. Something caught his eye and Avery stopped.

Seth was a few yards ahead before he realized he was alone. “Avery,” he whispered, “where the hell are you?”

Avery climbed back over the fence of the yard he’d found, his hands full of string peas. He hurried to join Seth and held out his hands so he could take some, too. “I found food.”

“Excellent.” They continued to walk as they ate the peas, listening for sounds of the police. They found a couple more gardens and helped themselves to more peas, and water from a garden hose. Avery was glad to get the taste of vomit out of his mouth. They washed the blood off their faces, too, as best they could in the dark.

“Everyone around here must like peas,” Avery said.

“It’s too early in the season for anything else, I’m guessing,” Seth said. “Tomatoes and such take longer.”

“Ohhhh, that makes sense.”

They continued to look for a way out of town.

“Do you think the cops are looking for us?” he asked Seth.

“We have to assume so.”

Avery nodded. ‘Right. So what should we do, d’ya think?”

“Keep walking until we can’t. I don’t like this town much. With luck there’ll be another one eventually.”

“Yeah, can’t say I like it much, either.”

“You feeling OK? I haven’t had a chance to ask.”

“Oh, you mean, cuz … yeah. I was so hungry.”

Seth laughed. “The looks on those guys’ faces.”

“Yeah, I guess it was pretty funny.”

“You kidding me? It was hilarious.”

“Yeah,” Avery looked at his feet, embarrassed.

“Avery.”

Avery looked at him.

“Any fight we walk away from is a win. Way to deploy the strategic barf, dude.”

Avery giggled. When Seth put it that way it was pretty funny, actually. “Thanks.”

Headlights passed the houses they stood behind, moving slow.

“Fuck.” Seth crouched down and grabbed Avery so he would too. They waddle walked behind a fence. Seth peeked out and then flattened himself against the fence again. “Shit.” He pointed toward a house across the alley and ran for it in a crouch, Avery on his heels, going in the opposite direction from the way the headlights had been going.

“Stop right there,” said a voice.

“Run,” said Seth.

They ran. Behind them they could hear the cop, who apparently was on foot, swearing as he tried to keep up. They ran between houses until they ran out of town and Seth just kept going, sprinting across the road and a field to a wood, Avery right beside him, the sound of the cop fading into the distance.

They walked through the woods for about an hour before emerging on the other side. Ahead of them was a huge field of crops. Seth suggested they skirt it to avoid destroying the baby shoots, so they walked along the edge on a grass verge. The cops were nowhere in sight and it was a nice night, a bit cool after the rain.

“Do you think we lost them?” Avery asked as they walked.

“Probably. Not sure we’re worth a lot of trouble. The cops probably know those assholes, and if I know the type they’re in trouble every other week.”

“Yeah.” Avery felt something warm and wet on his face. “Fuck, my nose is bleeding again.”

Seth looked at him. “Wow, yeah. Sit down.”

Avery plopped down on the damp grass, feeling suddenly lightheaded. 

“Pinch your nose together and tilt your head forward.”

Avery did that. He sensed Seth sitting down next to him. 

“We just gotta wait for it to pass.”

Avery nodded. “I always thought it was tilt it backward.” His voice sounded funny with his nose pinched.

“Don’t try to talk right now, but nah, it’s forward. Learned that from experience. Tilt it back and all the blood goes down your throat. Not fun.”

Avery nodded again, feeling vaguely panicky. He started to giggle.

Seth laughed too. “Don’t laugh, dinkus. You’re not helping your nose any.”

Avery laughed harder.

“You’re freaking out, aren’t you.”

Avery nodded, still giggling.

Seth pulled him close and held him to his chest. Avery calmed down slowly, listening to Seth’s heartbeat. Seth started to sing softly. He had a good voice, a light tenor with the same sardonic edge he spoke with.

Avery wanted to stay right there forever but he couldn’t help it. He laughed, not hysterical now, just amused. He looked up. “Dude, is that Poison?”

“Shut up. I couldn’t think of anything.” Seth said, releasing him. “Feel better?”

Avery nodded, wiping his face. “Yeah. Thanks.” He touched his nose. “I think it stopped.” He looked at Seth in the moonlight and saw streaks of blood on his clothes now. “Sorry about your shirt.” 

Seth looked down and shrugged. “We should keep moving.”

Avery stood reluctantly. He was still so hungry. The peas had barely taken the edge off. “Hope we find something soon.” His body was starting to feel the effects of being punched and thrown around.

“Me, too.”

They made their way to the country road that fronted the farm and started to walk. They walked until Avery’s throat was burning from thirst and his feet began to blister and still they saw nothing that resembled civilization. They had turned onto a slightly busier road, taking a break to pee in the ditch and hoping they’d find a gas station or truck stop but it felt like hours had passed. They didn’t speak, just trudged along in mutual misery.

Then, up ahead, they saw it: an illuminated orange and blue gas logo, burning like the beacon to heaven. Avery looked at Seth and they picked up their pace. It was still dark: he had no idea what time it was or how long he’d been walking, he was just so damned glad to see that shitty little gas station.

It was closed.

“Fuck,” Avery said, his voice breaking.

Seth gestured to the side of the building, where the restrooms were. He opened his suitcase and the case inside and pulled out the lockpicks. He handed Avery a flashlight. “Hold this.”

Avery held the flashlight while Seth worked the lock, kneeling beside the keyhole to the ladies’ room. Ten minutes later they were in. It was a one-holer. Seth let Avery go first, keeping a lookout outside. The restroom was ugly but clean. Avery used the toilet and washed his hands, grimacing at his face in the mirror. It was a mass of bruises and blood. He washed his face and drank several handfuls of water before going out to trade places.

They used the sink to wash their filthy shirts when Seth was done, wringing them out as best they could before putting them back in the suitcase and changing into clean ones.

“How are you doing?” Seth asked, looking over his own bruises before getting dressed.

“Mostly superficial,” Avery said, touching one tender bruise under his ribcage and wincing a bit.

“Where’d you get those scratches?”

“Oh. Hay bale.” Avery looked at them. They were angry and red.

“Come here, let me wash them off.” Seth grabbed a paper towel and squeezed soap onto it. ‘You probably have dirt in there.”

“OK, Mom.”

“You want to get an infection, wiseass?”

“No.” Avery let Seth wash the scratches. It hurt. “Why the ladies’ room?” he asked, mostly to distract himself.

“It’s always cleaner. Men are pigs.”

“Huh. I mean, they probably clean it at the end of the shift.”

“Probably being the operative word.” Seth finished washing the scratches and splashed some water on them to remove the soap. “That’ll have to do.”

“Thank you.”

‘Yep. And Grey?”

Avery looked at him. 

“I’m not your mom.” Seth said.

“You’re not. I’m sorry.”

Seth smiled slightly. “Because that would be incest.”

Avery snorted. “Any chance we could break into the main building for food?” he asked hopefully as he put his shirt on.

“No. That lock is electronic.”

“So what should we do?”

“We wait.”

They stepped outside. Seth had Avery hold the flashlight as he locked the restroom door. “We need to sit outside and wait for the first shift. It’s--” he checked his watch-- “3 a.m. They should be here by 5:30 or so. We tell them we had a fight with our friend after he threw us out of his car and he drove off without us because he’s an asshole. That is, if anyone asks, but I doubt they’ll ask. My experience is gas station attendants do not give a shit.” He sat down on the curb outside the front door, near the ice machine. “You can sleep first.” He patted his lap.

“You’re so fucking nice to me,” Avery said, a little teary. “Are you sure you don’t want to sleep?”

“Nah, I’m too keyed up.”

Avery knew that was most likely a lie but he was too tired to argue so he stretched out on the cement curb, his head in Seth’s lap. He didn’t think he’d be able to sleep but before he knew it early morning sunlight was in his eyes. He felt a weight on top of him and realized Seth had fallen asleep too. Avery sat up carefully, waking Seth in the process. He looked around as Seth yawned and stretched. A beat-up blue Chevrolet truck was now parked to the side of the building. He turned his head. The sign said Open.

“They’re open,” he said, standing up carefully. His body was mad at him. He looked around. “Where’s the suitcase?”

Seth got up too and retrieved it from behind the ice machine. “Let’s get something to eat.”

“How did you--” He looked at the suitcase, and the ice machine, which was a good four feet from where they’d been sleeping..

“I have long arms.”

“Huh.” 

The woman inside the store was middle aged and bored. She largely ignored them. They more or less inhaled a large breakfast at a plastic booth, drank bad coffee and bought snacks and water for the road before using the restroom--men’s this time, Seth had been wise to pick the women’s--and buying a map of Kansas. Avery longed for a shower, and sleep, not necessarily in that order.

They set off down the road again. Seth got out the map as they walked. It turned out that the next town was barely five miles away. 

“Wonder if they have a motel in, what’s the town?” Avery asked.

“Buford.”

Avery laughed. “What a name.”

Seth nodded. “Yeah. With luck they have lodgings.”

“Why didn’t you just ask her?”

“If the police are still looking for us we don’t want them to know where to find us,” Seth said, putting the map away. “That woman didn’t care about us, but the intrigue of being questioned by the police--what white woman could resist?”

“You are so cynical.”

“Realistic. Always assume the worst and you’ll stay out of a heap of trouble.”

Avery liked the way Seth said “heap of trouble.” He smiled. “Right. Good tip.”

They walked along in companionable silence.

Buford turned out to be a sprawling collection of buildings with a posted population of 415. The Buford Inn, an edifice right out of the Old West, stood several hundred yards from the road on which they walked, and had rooms available. A diner sat next door.

Their room had double beds--Avery could tell Seth was being cautious--and was clean and cute. Everything was gingham. To be honest, everything could have been iron spikes and lava as far as Avery was concerned. He stripped on his way to bed and was out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

When he woke up it was early evening. Seth emerged from the bathroom, wrapped in a towel skirt. Avery sat up and stretched. 

“Sorry I missed shower time.”

Seth smiled. “I decided to let you sleep a bit longer. But hurry up and get clean so we can eat.”

Avery realized he was hungry again, too. He hopped up and went to shower.

“Wash those scratches. I don’t want to have to go to a doctor.” Seth called after him.

“Right.” Avery did so. It stung a bit less than it had and the scratches had subsided to a less angry color. He decided this was a good sign. He washed the rest of himself too. It felt good to have clean hair again. He looked at himself in the mirror when he got out of the tub. He had a purpling bruise on his right cheekbone and another one on his lower left jaw. His nose had thankfully stopped bleeding, though it looked a little scuffed, like someone had rubbed him on pavement. He thought back to the fight. It was a blur but he seemed to remember his face connecting with the sidewalk once or twice. He was just thankful his nose wasn’t broken.

He came out of the bathroom, also wearing a towel. “Do we have anything left that’s not smelly, bloody, or vomited on?”

Seth chuckled and pointed to his bed. “I left you some stuff.”

Avery got dressed, refraining from calling Seth Mom this time, though he smiled a bit to himself. It seemed to bother Seth to be called on his nurturing tendencies. “Thanks,” was all he said.

“We should see if this town has a laundromat,” Seth said. “I think we’re far enough from Enoch to risk sticking around for a day.”

“Good plan.”

“Come on, the diner closes at 8 and I am starving.”

The special was a chicken dinner with Thanksgiving fixings “Just like Mom used to make.” Avery ordered that. Seth ordered steak. Avery noticed the bruise around Seth’s eye was a violent purple but at least his eye was still open. The split in his lip looked painful and swollen.

The waitress, a pretty Native American woman with a ponytail, was only a bit older than they were. She eyed them a little warily as she brought their drinks. “You boys get in a car crash or something?”

“Nah,” Seth said, “Got in an argument over whether beer tasted great or was less filling.”

Avery snorted.

The waitress laughed. “I see. Who won?”

“They did.”

She laughed again. “Well, as long as you’re OK.”

“Yes, ma’am. Thank you for asking.” Even with a split lip Seth’s smile was dazzling.

The waitress looked a little flustered as she went to check on her other tables.

Avery smiled at his drink. Their food came quickly so they didn’t talk much. Seth left a nice but not overly generous tip. Never stand out, he’d told Avery. Generosity is just as bad as rudeness. You don’t want to be remembered.

They went back to their room and sat by the bay window, which Seth opened to catch the night air. There was a loveseat underneath it and they took off their shoes and sat side by side, Seth’s arm around Avery’s shoulders.

“Can I ask you something?” Avery said.

“Sure,” 

“You charmed that waitress so she’d forget to be worried about us, didn’t you.”

“Yep. We went from those poor hurt boys to that sexy guy and his platonic friend in one short conversation.”

“How’d you get to be so smart?”

“I told you. I’m good at reading people, and I learned real early the art of deflection. Where you been, boy?” he said, putting on a harsher voice. “Off causin’ trouble,” he replied in a high kid’s voice.

Avery laughed. “Did that work?”

“Most of the time, yeah. If I said nothing I’d get grilled and I wasn’t about to tell my racist grandfather I’d been at the creek all day, goofing off with my black best friend.”

Avery nodded. ‘Do you miss him? Your friend, I mean.”

“Every damned day,” Seth said. “His father told me I wasn’t welcome when I was ten. I’m pretty sure my grandfather had something to do with that.”

Avery looked at him. “Damn. I’m sorry.”

Seth shrugged. “I saw him occasionally but the adults always whisked one or the other of us away, and then I ran away, so I don’t know what he’s doing now. I hope he’s having a good life.”

“Yeah.”

“Hey, listen.” Seth cocked his head toward the window. “Do you hear that?”

Over the crickets Avery could hear a guitar and a woman’s voice singing Rocky Mountain High and a couple of people laughing and her laughing too, probably defending her choice of song. Another woman said something and there was more laughter and then the guitar started up and the woman started singing John Denver songs again, this time without interruption. She had a clear lovely voice that carried on the breeze, like a radio in another room. Seth got up and turned off the lights and came and put his arm around Avery again and they sat in the dark, listening to their own private concert until late in the evening.


	12. The Price of Doing Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seth’s heart sank. He hadn’t considered that this would be a requirement. “I--don’t like guns much.”

Chapter Twelve

1993  
Mynah’s Creek  
Three Weeks Later

“So, what are you going to be doing?” Avery sat on the bed, watching Seth get dressed. They had a few more things now, thanks to them both being employed, Avery at the bar and Seth at the library. Fee had taken them shopping in Morgan City so they had a few non-thrift items as well, like underwear and decent shoes.

“I don’t know,” Seth said, sitting down to put on his shoes. He was wearing Avery’s new custom suit since he’d been told to dress up a bit. Once upon a time the shoulders might have been narrow on Seth but four years of hard living had given Avery more muscle. Seth had to admit he looked nice right now, wearing just his jeans, swinging his legs like he was a goddamned six year old. 

He sensed Avery was maybe a little jealous that he’d been asked to do something extra for Draygo, but he wasn’t in the mood to make his lover feel better. “They just said their regular resources were spread pretty thin and Draygo didn’t want Magnus to do this thing alone.”

Avery nodded. “Well, be careful.”

Seth smiled and went to kiss Avery goodbye, feeling a little bad for being irritated. “Always. You doing something fun tonight?”

“Just working.”

“I thought it was your night off.”

“It was but the other guy had plans so I said I’d swap. Hey, maybe we could go to the Double Take tomorrow, since you’re all better now? I can ask around about a boat or maybe Fee and Kiver will want to go.”

“Sounds fun, if this thing doesn’t interfere.” There it was again, that feeling of irritation. He shoved it aside.

“Do you think it will?”

“Doubt it, just, we’ll have to play it by ear.”

Avery nodded. “That’s cool. See you later, then.”

Seth nodded and left. He was glad Avery was in his life but if he were honest one of the major appeals of having a permanent address was both of them expanding their circles of friends. He liked that Avery seemed to be hitting it off with some of the crew at the bar. After four years of constantly being together Seth was craving some time in other company. He knew they needed to talk but he’d been putting it off. Soon, he promised himself, taking the stairs two at a time.

Magnus was waiting in the road in a black nondescript car with a plush leather interior. Seth slid into the passenger seat and the car purred off into the night.

“Where we going?” he asked.

“A restaurant in Baton Rouge. On the surface, you’re my date.” Magnus wore one of his usual three piece suits--this one was all black--and Seth was glad he’d dressed up. Magnus’s hair, unlike Draygo’s, was always neat. It hung in loose coils.Tonight he wore it pulled back.

Seth looked at him. “And beneath that surface?”

“Courier wanted to exchange goods in a public place. They’re a bit jumpy. You’re there to watch my back.”

Seth nodded.

“Which reminds me, there’s a gun in the glove compartment.”

Seth’s heart sank. He hadn’t considered that this would be a requirement. “I--don’t like guns much.”

Magnus frowned. “I like getting shot at when I’m unarmed less.”

Seth nodded, looking out the window. 

“You know how to shoot, right?”

Seth looked back at him. “I had a BB gun when I was a kid, does that count?”

“No.”

OK, forget trying to be charming. “I know how a gun works.”

Magnus pulled the car over. “Get the gun.” He got out.

Seth opened the glove compartment reluctantly and took out a plain black handgun. It felt cool and slightly heavy in his hand. He got out of the car.

Magnus came over and held out his hand for the gun. “This is going to be a real fast lesson so pay attention.”

Seth nodded.

Magnus showed him how to load the gun, operate the safety, and hold it properly. He made Seth repeat what he’d done. 

“OK, now shoot that tree.” He pointed.

Seth fired and missed the tree. The shot pinged off into the swamp.

“Try it again.” Magnus’s voice betrayed no emotion but Seth sensed he wasn’t pleased.

After four years of being the one who knew what was what this was a new, mostly unwelcome experience: being the dumb newbie. Seth concentrated and fired. This time he hit the tree.

“Gonna have to do,” Magnus said. “We can’t be late. Get in. Don’t forget the safety.”

“Wasn’t about to,” Seth muttered, putting the safety on and getting in. His hand stung slightly. His healing knuckles still gave him twinges.

“There’s a shoulder holster in the glove compartment as well. Put it on.”

Seth took off his jacket as Magnus drove and spent some time adjusting the holster, which had been worn by someone much shorter.

“You want to work for us, you need to carry a gun,” Magnus said, lighting a cigarette and watching the road. “We don’t have room for pacifists. People are going to shoot at us. We want to be able to shoot back.”

“I’m not a pacifist,” Seth said, feeling defensive. “I’m a realist.”

“Well, welcome to a new reality.”

Seth frowned. “I’ve been on my own for seven years and I’ve done pretty well. I don’t like guns because they escalate things.”

“So when someone points a gun at you, you what? Surrender?”

“I give them what they want. If I pointed a gun too they’d just shoot me.”

Magnus cut his eyes to him. “You’ve never been in a position where that person wanted to just kill you?”

“Yes, of course I have.”

“What did you do then?”

“Talked them out of it, made a scene, hit them with the nearest heavy object, ran like hell.”

“So, you’ve been lucky.”

“Or smart.”

Magnus rolled his eyes. “And you’ve never been in a position where you needed to point the gun first?”

“I don’t let myself get into situations like that.”

Magnus stubbed out his cigarette in car ashtray and lit another one. With his sea dweller horns and frilled ears the constant smoke gave him the appearance of a small, well-dressed dragon. “Again, you’ve been lucky.”

“Look, I’m not saying I refuse to use a gun now,” Seth said, irritated. “I am explaining my reasoning for not using one when I was just a kid on my own.”

Magnus nodded. He said nothing for a while, just smoked and drove.

Seth managed to adjust the holster and slid the gun into it. “I’ll fucking practice using a gun.”

“Good.” Magnus glanced at him. “You’re left-handed.”

“Yes.”

“So is Fee. He could probably give you some tips.”

“Thanks. I’ll ask him.” Seth shrugged his jacket back over his shoulders and adjusted the collar, feeling grouchy. He fucking hated guns. Avery’s paradise had its first cloud. He masked his irritation, though. This was Magnus’s call, and Magnus was the boss. He was just reminded of why he’d never wanted a boss.

Magnus nodded again.

“Do you often end up shooting people?” Seth asked after a while.

“No.”

“Well that’s something.”

“You want out?”

“No. Just asking a question.” Seth looked out the window.

“It’s not like we go around shooting pedestrians.” Magnus’s voice was flat and Seth sensed he was annoyed again.

“Yes, I realize that.” Seth mostly succeeded in keeping the edge out of his voice. “I also realize that a lot of the luck I’ve had is because I’m human, and white. I’m not an idiot. I know the world’s not fair. I just … give me ten minutes to get used to this.”

Magnus nodded.

“Thank you.”

Magnus turned on the radio. Jazz played quietly as Seth continued to look out the window. 

“I need to know you’ll have my back,” Magnus said after a while.

“I will. You all have been nothing but decent to Avery and me so if someone needs shooting I’ll shoot them.” He felt like he was slipping farther out of favor with every minute, so he did something he never did: he tried to explain. “For seven years I’ve been more or less on the run, living by my wits, and for the last four keeping my boyfriend alive too. It’s not that he’s an idiot. He’s just … I don’t know, innocent isn’t quite the word. But he’s a hell of a lot nicer than me. We’ve had some close calls.”

“Coulda used a gun.” Magnus said.

Seth snorted. “I’m trying to explain here.”

“Sorry.” He didn’t seem especially sorry.

“What I’m trying to say is even when things were good we had to lie about some aspect or another of who we really were. Minors, gay, thieves, whatever. We don’t have to do that in Mynah’s Creek.”

Magnus looked at him briefly.

Seth met his eyes. “I might have to adjust to owning a gun but it’s a small thing compared to that.”

Magnus nodded. “OK.”

It started to rain, and Magnus turned on the wipers. For a time the only sound was softly playing New Orleans jazz and the wipers keeping time with the rain.

“So, logistics,” Magnus said after a while. “We try to find a table where we can both watch the room. If that happens you sit across from me, on the right side if the table is against the wall. If our table is such that one of us would have his back to the room you sit next to me, on my left so you can get your gun easily.”

“Sounds reasonable.” Seth looked at him. “You know, we’re going to stand out if we just sit there stiffly, unless that’s not a consideration.”

“What’s your point?”

Seth shrugged. “We should pretend to enjoy each other’s company. Flirt a little. You do flirt, right?” Trolls in his experience did not care if you were straight, queer, or really into toasters but no one wanted to watch two people flirt. 

Magnus rewarded that with a small smile. “It’s been known to happen.”

“We could practice.”

Magnus barked a laugh. 

“I’m serious. I have no idea how to flirt with you. I haven’t met someone so buttoned down since … me.”

Magnus gave him a look.

“Normally, I mean. I’m normally not very chatty. You’ve got me all off kilter.”

Magnus smiled and lit another cigarette.

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you.” Seth said.

The smile grew.

Seth rolled his eyes and laughed a little. “Fuck, this is how you flirt, isn’t it.”

Magnus laughed. Seth joined in.

“Goddamned bastard.”

Magnus threw him a truly evil grin and Seth found himself wondering what it was like to kiss him. He had sharp little teeth like a piranha’s but a few cuts and scrapes seemed a fair exchange. He chuckled and looked out the window, shaking his head.

They entered the Baton Rouge city limits shortly after. Magnus drove them to the run down section of town, near the water, and parked by what looked like a warehouse. “This is a troll establishment so let me do the talking,” Magnus said. “Same goes with our courier. You’re the muscle.”

Seth nodded as they got out of the car. The rain had mostly stopped. He adjusted his coat and followed Magnus into the building.

Inside the place was dark and atmospheric, with secluded booths and rustic decor. The host, a short rustblood, sat them at a booth against the back wall with a clear view of the room after Magnus slipped them some bills. They sat across from each other, Seth to the right.

“Go ahead and order,” Magnus said, looking over the menu. “We’re half an hour early.”

Seth ordered what he always did: steak, unadorned, vegetable, baked potato with sour cream and chive. Steak offered energy and potato filled you up in case you didn’t eat for a while. He got food regularly now but it was a long-ingrained habit.

Magnus ordered the same, though his steak had butter and mushrooms. He also ordered a bottle of wine for the table. 

Seth looked around. “This is a nice place.”

Magnus nodded. 

The waiter, a tall thin goldblood, brought them their wine and two glasses, plunking them down before sashaying off to another table. Seth looked around. He was one of only two humans in the room. The other was a large man who sat at a table with two trolls. None of them looked happy.

Magnus rolled his eyes and poured the wine. 

Seth cut his eyes to the waiter and back again. “He doesn’t like humans.”

“No. Cheers.” 

Seth clinked his glass to his before taking a sip. It was a very good Malbec. “Wine’s good, anyway.”

Magnus nodded.

“Well, here’s hoping he doesn’t spit on my steak.”

Magnus snorted. They drank for a while, unobtrusively watching the room.

Seth leaned across the table and took Magnus’s hands, playing with one of them. Magnus raised an eyebrow. “Do you see the human dude and the trolls by the door?” he whispered, smiling shyly up at Magnus.

“Yeah, I’ve been watching them. They’re checking out everyone who enters.”

“What do you think the odds are that they’d be here waiting for someone else?”

Magnus kissed his hand and smiled at him. “Be right back. Gotta see a guy about a horse.”

“Hurry back,” Seth said.

By the time he came back their food had arrived. Seth followed Magnus’s lead and enjoyed his meal. Seth smiled at Magnus frequently, playing the part of a man in love. Magnus smiled back enigmatically. They didn’t talk much.

Magnus paid their bill and they left. Seth let his hand trail along Magnus’s shoulders as they stepped outside. They got in the car. Seth checked the street as Magnus started the engine. The three men from the restaurant did not appear.

“You’ve got good instincts,” Magnus said as he drove them away from the restaurant. “I was just trying to decide what to do about the situation.”

“It’s why I’m still alive.” Seth did a little jazz hands gesture. “I take it the rendezvous changed?”

Magnus smiled slightly. “Yeah, we’re meeting them at a club.”

“Right. So, I stick close, watch your back, we dance, we have a drink, we get whatever the thing is and go?”

“It’s an envelope full of cash, and yes.”

Seth nodded. “Is the courier a troll?”

“Yes. Rustblood, short, female, says she’s wearing a sexy gold dress tonight.”

“Do you trust her?”

“Well, I mean, we’re all criminals, so no, but she’s being paid well and was grateful we kept her out of a possible trap at the restaurant.”

“Right. So, she gives the money to you, I watch for trouble, we spend a little time at the club, and go?”

“That’s the plan.”

“OK. Thanks for trusting me with the details.”

“You’re welcome. I told her to find us. I described you, shouldn’t be difficult for her.”

“Oh? And how did you describe me?” Seth fluttered his eyelashes.

Magnus laughed shortly. “I told her you were human.”

“Well, you’re not wrong.”

Magnus snorted.

“I take it this is another troll establishment?” Seth asked as Magnus pulled into the parking lot.

“Correct.”

They followed a group of giggling trolls wearing party dresses into the club. One of them looked at them and giggled some more. They paid a cover and stepped into a large black box filled with neon lights and pumping music. Magnus made his way to the bar, Seth following close behind. 

Magnus grabbed Seth by the tie and pulled him down for a kiss. His skin was unexpectedly cool and his teeth grazed Seth’s lip. Seth smiled.

“Now that I have you closer, what do you want to drink?” Magnus asked.

Seth laughed. “Dry gin martini, lemon twist.”

“You’re kidding me.”

“No.”

Magnus released Seth and turned to give their order, holding up two fingers. Seth laughed. 

They couldn’t find a table so they loitered in a corner, their backs to the wall, drinking their drinks. It was too loud to talk. As they stood there a pretty rustblood troll in a scandalous gold dress stumbled into Magnus. 

“Whoopsie,” she said. “Little too drunk.” She teetered off into the crowd. 

Magnus finished his drink and set the glass down. He smiled up at Seth and gestured for him to come closer. Seth bent down and kissed him, thinking that this job was a lot more fun than he’d anticipated. They made out for a while and Magnus gestured for the door. Seth nodded, and they left.

They got in the car. Seth put on his seatbelt, expecting to leave, but Magnus pulled him in for another kiss. He smiled as he released him.

“I thought that was just a show for appearance’s sake,” Seth said, looking at him.

“It can’t be both?”

Seth smiled. “I guess it can. I take it we got what we came for?”

Magnus nodded and patted his jacket pocket. It made a slight rustling sound. He started the car and headed for home. “So what kind of jobs have you done?” He asked as they were leaving Baton Rouge.

“You mean crime?”

Magnus laughed. “Yes.”

“Uh, mostly short-term impromptu cons intended to keep people from hurting us. Picking pockets, a few break ins, mostly easy snatch and grab. Card hustles.”

“So, small time stuff.”

“Yes. My main goals were to eat and not get killed. We’ve been fairly lucky at cards, though. Bought us two of these suits and a nice life for a bit.”

“What happened?”

“Dude had a gun,” Seth muttered.

“What? I didn't hear you.” Magnus grinned at him.

“Some guy had a gun.”

Magnus cackled.

“Shut up,” Seth said. “I still contend that had we also been armed things would have gone south for all involved. I’d rather lose my money than my life, or Avery’s.”

Magnus was still laughing, but he nodded. “Well, welcome to the big time.”

“So, this is how you fund the town?”

Magnus nodded. 

“Guess all those free apartments don’t pay for themselves, huh.”

“Literally,” Magnus said.

Seth laughed. “I mean, you could just charge people.”

“Capitalism is inherently corrupt,” Magnus said. “And the people who end up in our town can’t afford rent. Could you?”

“No.”

“We don’t think that means you should live on the street. So, we steal, gamble, hustle, but we don’t kill people for their money. Violent crime is not our bag. We do however like to be able to protect ourselves.”

Seth nodded. “I can get behind that. Fuck society and its rules. My grandfather was an upstanding capitalist.”

Magnus snorted. “And yet here you are.”

“Yeah. I left home at 15 because I found out in his spare time he was a professional racist.”

Magnus raised an eyebrow.

“Local chapter leader of the KKK.”

Magnus whistled. 

Seth nodded. “My mother raised me better than that.”

“She’s dead, I take it?”

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Me, too, but I was ten so I’ve had time to come to terms with it. Anyway, what I’m saying is, I’m in if you want me.”

Magnus smiled. “I think we can find a spot for you.”

Seth nodded. “Good.”


	13. A Friend in Need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I knew it. You planned the whole thing just to get extra snuggles.”

Chapter Thirteen

1989  
Columbus, Ohio

Avery sneezed again and Seth pulled him closer, trying futilely to shelter him from the pouring rain. They were both drenched to the bone. Seth held the suitcase in his other hand as they negotiated the hilly street. Avery felt unnaturally warm.

“Fuck, man, you’re burning up.” Seth didn’t get sick much and wasn’t sure what this meant other than Avery needed to rest, take some aspirin, and get out of this rain. His grandmother’s voice echoed in his head, something about catching your death of pneumonia. He hoped that was just hyperbole, like most things that left her mouth. Regardless, they needed to find shelter soon.

Avery didn’t answer, just stumbled along beside him in a kind of daze. Seth looked around. They had hopped a train and now were in what looked like an abandoned part of town. Seth had risked waiting until the train stopped this time and had had to nearly carry his friend off of it. Lucky for them no one noticed, probably due to the driving rain.

Warehouses surrounded them now, looking like ghosts. Seth decided to risk their being occupied and hurried to the nearest one, picking the lock. Avery slumped down on the cement and leaned heavily against him.

“Come on, slugger,” he said, hauling him to his feet again. It was like wrestling a wet sack of sand. He dragged Avery inside. Inside it was cool and dark and abruptly silent. The warehouse was a huge space, mostly empty save for some crates in the middle of the room. Seth headed toward them, again almost carrying Avery.

The crates were large, wooden, and all closed, stacked in a neat pile. He sat Avery down in an inelegant heap propped against one of them and got the screwdriver out of his suitcase to pry its neighbor open. Dust flew out to greet him and he coughed a bit but was relieved to see the crate was otherwise clean, and empty. Chances were the others were too, which meant this building was likely not in use. The side he’d pried off was away from the door. Someone would have to come looking to find them.

He made Avery a bed out of clothing inside the crate. It was big enough to fit them both. He didn’t carry blankets, the suitcase was too small, but he did have a thin trench coat. Underwear and shirts balled up in a hoodie made a good pillow. “Come on, Grey, bedtime,” he said, helping him up again. Avery was half asleep. Seth still had some painkillers from the last time they’d needed them, and water in a thermos, both of which he made Avery take before letting him lie down. He also removed his wet clothes--Avery’s jeans stuck to him and were a bit of a struggle--and lay them flat to dry, pulling the other hoodie over his head and then laying him down gently on the bare crate floor. His friend was instantly asleep, his breathing a bit louder than usual. Seth covered him with the trench coat and huddled against the wall of the crate, holding his knees, trying to come up with a plan. 

He felt cold so he took off his own shirt and pulled on the last remaining dry T-shirt. He considered changing out of his wet jeans but the only other trousers were the suit pants and he wanted to avoid destroying them. Avery would need real food when he woke up, and Seth could do with some too, which meant he’d be venturing out in the rain again.

“You’re lucky you’re so cute,” he told his sleeping companion. There were other truths nagging at Seth that he just wasn’t ready to acknowledge, feelings that had started from almost the moment they met, as if they’d always known each other somehow. He shoved them aside. Avery was cute, and sweet, and kinda sexy. More importantly, he was Seth’s friend. Of course he’d take care of him.

Right. Time to see if there was a store anywhere nearby that sold soup and something to keep it heated. He had nothing with which to leave Avery a note. He’d heard there were mobile phones now. Maybe that’d be something to look into. For now he was counting on Avery being tired enough to sleep for a couple of hours while he went to find supplies.

He grabbed the envelope of cash from the suitcase and removed five twenties, which he put in his wallet. He put the rest back in the zipped pocket of the suitcase, betting on no one expecting a homeless teen to have cash, even if someone did happen upon Avery. Thanks to frugal living they still had well over $1,000.

He felt Avery’s forehead. It was still very hot. He left the thermos in view in case Avery woke and headed out.

It was still raining cats and dogs. Seth just walked. He had no coat or anything to hunch down inside of so he accepted he was going to get wet. He made a mental note of the cross street name nearest the warehouse and headed toward what he hoped was town, away from the way they’d come. He passed several more abandoned warehouses before the buildings grew shorter, vacant lots eventually making room for cracker boxes of houses, and an intersection with a pizza joint, a bar, and a convenience store.

He slipped inside the store and stood dripping on the mat. Other than the clerk he appeared to be the only one there at present. The clerk was young, cute, and black, with a high fade. He was listening to music on headphones but stopped when he turned and saw Seth. He took off the headphones, staring at him.

“Dude.”

“Yeah, it’s a little wet out there.”

“Uh, yeah.” He put the headphones around his neck and switched off the player. “I wish I had a towel or something I could offer you.”

Seth smiled. “Uh, thanks, but I’m OK. Sorry about your floor.”

The kid shrugged. “S’Okay.”

“I’m, uh, actually here because my roommate is really sick and I figured I’d get him some chicken soup and tissues, and some cold medicine if you have it.”

“Oh, yeah, totally. Hey, why don’t you wait there and I’ll get you the stuff. Less for me to mop that way.”

Seth nodded. “Cool.” He rubbed his arms a little. “Hey, do you sell Sterno? Our stove’s out and our landlord is a fuckhead.”

“I think you’re just repeating yourself,” the guy said, coming out from behind the counter. He wore a white T-shirt, black windbreaker, and blue jeans. He was a little shorter than Seth, and kind of skinny. “You know, landlord and fuckhead are pretty much the same thing. I’m Conrad by the way.” 

Seth laughed. “Seth.”

“Nice to meet you. So, uh, sure, we’ve got Sterno, and chicken soup. Want some orange juice? My granny’s always pushing that when I’m sick.” Conrad stepped behind some shelves at the back of the small store.

“Yeah, that sounds good. You have any deli sandwiches? I’m pretty hungry myself.”

“Yeah, hold on." Conrad went to the cooler. "Looks like ham and cheese or egg salad is your only choice.”

“Ham and cheese is good.”

“Right.” Conrad grabbed some orange juice too before heading to another section of the store. He stuck his head up over the shelf. “Does your roommate have a fever? Cough? Stuffy chest?”

“I’d say A and C.”

“Right.” He ducked down again. “Holy cow there are a lot of options. Do you need aspirin?”

“No, got that.”

“OK.”

Conrad came back to the front, holding several items, which he dumped awkwardly on the counter. “I also got you this tea my granny swears by when anyone’s got a cold. And matches, cuz otherwise that Sterno’s gonna be useless.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Sure, man. You’re a good friend to come out in the rain like that,” Conrad said as he rang up Seth’s purchases.

Seth shrugged. “He’d do the same for me.”

“It’s good to have friends like that.”

“Yeah,” Seth said. “It is.”

“Hope he gets better,” Conrad said, handing over the bag. He’d double wrapped it, tying the inner bag so the items inside wouldn’t get wet.

“Me, too. Thanks again.”

Conrad waved goodbye as Seth ventured out in the rain, which had slowed to a mere downpour.

Avery was still asleep, looking sweaty, though he felt less hot to Seth’s touch. Seth took that as a sign of progress. Avery’s breathing was still a little labored. Seth decided to let him sleep rather than wake him to take the cold medicine.

He was cold and wet so he took off his shirt and lay it with the others to dry. He tried to read but it was too dark with the rain. Tried to meditate but couldn’t get in the right frame of mind. He was too tired to exercise by this point so he settled for cuddling up to his warm boyfriend and trying to sleep. Avery made a little noise and pressed his back against Seth’s chest. Seth smiled and kissed the back of his sweaty head.

He couldn’t sleep, but Avery was nice and warm and he was cold so he lay there thinking about how much better his life had become since meeting this dorky kid in a hotel room in Vegas. Avery was a pretty good partner in crime, all things considered, and more importantly, he was trustworthy. The fact that he and Seth liked each other and having another person around was both safer and a hell of a lot less boring was just icing on the cake.

Avery woke up a few hours later. Seth had dozed off from boredom but woke when his friend moved. 

“Where are we?” Avery sat up slowly and started to cough.

Seth sat up too and reached for the orange juice, which was now room temperature. “Columbus, Ohio. More specifically, an abandoned warehouse. Here, have some orange juice.”

Avery drank some once the coughing subsided. The cough sounded rasping and horrible to Seth.

“Here, I got you some cold medicine.” He gave him some, which Avery drank, holding the dosage cup with two hands like a little kid and then making a face.

“That’s nasty.”

“Yeah, sorry. You hungry?”

“Yeah, actually.”

Seth handed him a deli sandwich. He’d already eaten one himself. He didn’t want to get too many because they didn’t have a way to keep it cold. 

Avery ate a few bites.

“I could make soup instead if you’d rather.”

“How?”

Set held up the Sterno and matches.

“Oh, cool. Smart thinking.” Avery shivered. 

“You cold?”

“Yeah, just suddenly.”

Seth put his arms around him and Avery leaned against him.

“Sorry I got sick,” Avery said, sneezing.

“I knew it. You planned the whole thing just to get extra snuggles.” Seth handed him a tissue.

Avery laughed and blew his nose. “You got me.”

Seth checked the bottle of painkillers. “Looks like you can take more of these. They should help with the fever.” He handed him two.

“Thanks for taking care of me.” Avery washed the pills down with orange juice.

“Of course, dummy. If you could manage to walk for a bit we could try to get a hotel room. You’d be a lot warmer and more comfortable.”

“Maybe later.” Avery pulled away from Seth and lay down again. “Really tired.”

“You sleep.” Seth rewrapped the remainder of Avery’s sandwich and put it with the rest of the food.

Avery slept fitfully all day and through the night, waking to cough or because his body ached and he could not get comfortable. His fever did not go away, and by morning most of the cough medicine was gone. 

Seth was starting to feel a little panicky. He had no idea if this was normal or not. Injuries, he could deal with. Sickness scared him. He thought about Conrad and wondered if his granny would know what to do. By morning he decided he needed to go and ask.

“Avery, can you hear me?” He put his hand on his shoulder and spoke into his ear.

“Mmmm.”

“I’m going to go get you some more medicine.”

Avery nodded and huddled up under the trenchcoat. Seth pulled on the dryest T-shirt he could find and headed out.

The rain had stopped sometime during the night. Seth had to skirt a few puddles in the uneven pavement as he made his way to the convenience store. He hoped Conrad was working today but if he wasn’t maybe he could ask when his next shift was.

When he got there the store was closed. The hours posted were 6 a.m. to Midnight. He checked his watch and sat down on the narrow ledge that ran around the base of the building to wait for 20 minutes.

At 5:59 a chubby Latina wearing headphones, her hair in a ponytail, showed up to open the shop. She turned off her music when she saw Seth. “Just couldn’t wait to get your gummy worms, huh?”

Seth smiled. “Guilty as charged.”

She laughed and let him into the store. “I shouldn’t let you in yet, so shhh.”

Seth mimed zipping his lips.

“I was actually hoping to find Conrad,” Seth confessed as the girl went behind the counter. 

“Ohhh,” she said, smiling. “I could call him for you.” She took a bank envelope out of her jacket and started counting it into the drawer. Seth thought about how trusting she was. He could have easily overpowered her and taken the money. It wasn’t his style, but still. She ought to be more careful.

“I wouldn’t want to wake him.”

“Oh don’t worry, he’s one of those watchacallits, early risers.”

“Well, if you’re sure.”

She grinned at him. “Oh, he’ll want to talk to you. One sec while I finish up.” She finished putting the money in the drawer and pushed it shut, then dialed a number on the store phone, which had a wireless receiver. “Hey Conrad,” she said, after a minute, “It’s Juliana. There’s someone here who wants to talk to you.” She made the last words sing a little and Seth smiled. So Conrad had a crush on him. That was nice.

He took the phone from her. “Hey Conrad, this is Seth.”

“Oh.” There was a pause. “Right. How’s your roommate?”

“He’s actually not doing all that much better,” Seth said, smile vanishing. He wandered away from the counter. “That’s, uh, why I wanted to talk to you. I was hoping you could ask your granny. I don’t know much about taking care of sick people.”

“Oh! Yeah, for sure. What are his symptoms?”

“His fever just keeps coming back, he’s got a bad cough, can’t sleep very easily, kind of out of it.”

“Right. Hold on, I’ll ask her.”

Seth waited.

“So,” Conrad came back on, “I uh, can’t get a straight answer out of her but she says I need to give you her magic formula to give to your friend. She says over the counter stuff is rubbish and this will heal him a lot quicker.”

“Uh, OK?”

“To be fair, I’ve taken it myself and it does seem to work. She says he’d get better in about a week otherwise, if he doesn’t get pneumonia, but you can ignore that because she’s a bit of an alarmist.” He raised his voice on that one and Seth thought he heard a woman’s voice say Bah in the background.

Seth thought about it. “OK, I mean, if she’s willing to spare some I’ll give it a try.”

“Great. I’ll be at the store shortly. It’s not far.”

“Tell her thanks, I really appreciate it.”

“Sure.” Conrad hung up.

Seth handed Juliana the phone. “Thanks.”

“Sure. His granny’s a bit odd but she knows her shit. Don’t worry. Your friend’s in good hands.”

He nodded. “OK.”

“Sorry he’s so sick. You’re a good friend.”

Seth shrugged. “So is he.”

She nodded. Another customer came in--an older white lady. Seth shopped for some more food and got some cough medicine for Avery just in case the magic formula didn’t work. He paid for his purchases and then went outside to wait for Conrad.

The day was warming up. The sun felt good on his skin after all that rain. It was July but the rain had made everything a bit chilly. It looked like today might be a nicer day.

He heard Conrad before he saw him: his rusting car clearly needed a new muffler. He drove up to the store and parked parallel outside: there was no parking lot. He hopped out. 

“Hey.”

“Hey, Conrad. Thank you so much.”

Conrad handed Seth a plain brown paper bag. “She says he should take two teaspoons every six hours until he gets better unless he weighs more than 200 pounds, then he should take three. Teaspoon’s included.”

“OK, thanks. Thank your granny too, this is amazing of her.”

“I could give you a ride.”

“Nah, it’s just a couple of blocks.”

Conrad looked around. Looked about to say something, then just nodded. “Hey, I should give you my phone number. In case you have more questions.”

“OK, sure.” 

Conrad wrote it down and handed it over. “Sorry about Juliana. She’s always trying to fix me up.”

Seth laughed. “No worries.”

“I mean, you might not even be gay.” Conrad wasn’t looking at him.

“Oh, I am.”

“But your roommate?” Conrad put the word in audible quotes.

“I’m a free agent. I’m just worried about him right now.”

Conrad nodded. “Of course. Understandable.” He was blushing a little.

“Conrad.”

He looked at him.

“Under different circumstances I would date the hell out of you.”

Conrad grinned. “Well, I mean, maybe when he’s better … “

“Maybe, yeah.” Seth smiled his best false smile. When Avery was better they’d be outta here, and that made him a little sad. He really liked Conrad.

“Well, if you need anything, please call.”

“Thank you. You’ve been great.”

Conrad nodded. “Sure about that ride?”

“I’m sure.”

“OK. Well, uh, see you around then.”

“See you.” Seth waited until Conrad drove off to head back toward their hidey hole. He knew he had raised his suspicions and figured there wasn’t a whole lot of housing in this general area. Well, too late to change that now. He hoped Conrad wouldn’t mention it to anyone.

Avery was shivering violently when he returned, huddled into himself for warmth. It was too early to give him the elixir. Seth wanted to wait until the other cough medicine had worn off so he wouldn’t accidentally overdose. He sat down and put his arms around him.

“Hey.”

“So cold.”

“You’re burning up, man.” Seth wanted to give him some painkiller for the fever but didn’t know what was in granny’s elixir and realized he should wait for that, too. He checked his watch. An hour and forty-two minutes to go.

“So … uncomfortable,” Avery said through chattering teeth. “My whole body hurts.” He started coughing, a deep rasping cough that seemed to start from somewhere below him.

Seth realized that even with granny’s magic elixir what Avery needed was a good long sleep on someplace other than a floor. He also realized that he wasn’t going to get Avery to a bed without help. The question was how much did he trust Conrad. 

“Hey, I met this nice guy who has a car. I think he’d probably drive us to a hotel if I asked him.”

Avery looked at him. “Would he t-tell the author--” He coughed.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so. But it’s up to you. I have some good cough medicine but you really need to sleep and this floor isn’t cutting it.”

Avery nodded, teeth still chattering. “I trust you.”

“OK. I’m going to call him. I saw a payphone down the block. Hopefully it still works.”

Avery nodded again.

Seth kissed his forehead. “Hang in there, I’ll be back.”

He dug out some change and sprinted to the phone. It rang a couple of times and a woman picked up.

“Hello?”

“Uh, hello, Ma’am, I’m a friend of Conrad’s. Is he home?”

“Hold on, he’s just coming in. Conrad! Phone!”

There was a pause and then Conrad answered. “Hello?”

“Conrad, this is Seth again. I hate to bother you but … we need a ride.”

Conrad didn’t hesitate. “Where are you?”

“Uh, do you know where the abandoned warehouses are?”

“Yes.”

“We’re two warehouses down from Monroe. Number 216.”

“OK. I’ll be right there.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t sweat it, man.” He hung up.

Seth walked back to their warehouse and went inside to pack. “Avery, I got us a ride. Do you think you could walk to the door?”

Avery nodded. 

Seth helped him put his jeans back on and tied his shoes on his feet, then gathered up their things with his right hand before helping Avery up with his left. They made their way slowly to the door and stood outside waiting for Conrad. Seth hoped he hadn’t been foolish to trust his new acquaintance. Paranoid thoughts of him showing up with a social worker or his uncle the cop ran through Seth’s mind but when Conrad pulled up a few minutes later he was alone.

Conrad hopped out and opened the back door to the car. Seth tossed their things on the seat and helped Avery to sit, buckling him in. Avery looked miserable.

Seth got in the front seat with Conrad.

“Where to?” Conrad asked.

“We’ve got a little money,” Seth said, “I think we need a hotel with decent beds for a change.”

Conrad nodded. “The Holiday Inn’s pretty good, according to our out of state relatives. And not super expensive or my Aunt May would have complained.”

Seth laughed a little. “That sounds fine. Thank you so much.”

Conrad started the car and drove off carefully, glancing in the rearview at Avery. “You weren’t kidding, he looks pretty sick.”

“Yeah, I hope the hotel won’t turn us away.”

“I can stay with him while you check in. That way they won’t know you’re bringing them the plague.”

Seth hesitated for just a second before agreeing. “OK.”

Conrad glanced at him. “I don’t suppose you’ve had much cause to trust people.”

“No.”

“Tell you what, I’ll give you my wallet as collateral.”

Seth looked at him.

“For what’s his name.”

“Avery.”

“Yeah. You take my wallet with you and I stay with your boyfriend. That way you know I’m not gonna run off with him.”

Seth looked at him. “How do you know I won’t steal from you?”

“You won’t. And you won’t leave him. You clearly care about him very much.”

Seth nodded. “You don’t have to give me your wallet, Conrad. But since I’m the kind of paranoid motherfucker who now thinks, that’s exactly how I’d play someone if I were a kidnapper I’m going to take you up on it.”

Conrad laughed. “Your brain must be an interesting place.”

“Oh, it is.”

“Here we are.” Conrad pulled the car under the awning at the hotel entrance and handed Seth his wallet, which Seth pocketed. “See you soon.”

Seth got a room with two queen beds, partly out of caution and partly because he didn’t want to catch what Avery had, assuming that ship hadn’t sailed already. He noticed a wheelchair near the entrance with the hotel logo on it and nabbed it.

Conrad and Avery were sitting quietly in the car. Conrad got out and Seth gave him back his wallet. Conrad held the wheelchair while Seth helped Avery settle into it. Seth put their groceries on Avery’s lap and picked up the suitcase. Avery cuddled the bag like a teddy bear.

“Thank you so much,” he said to Conrad. “I’m going to give him some of that cold medicine and put him to bed.”

“Sure, I hope he feels better soon.”

Seth nodded. “See you round.”

“See you.”

Seth wheeled Avery into the hotel and into the elevator. Their room was on the second floor and Seth though he’d never seen a prettier sight than those two neatly made beds with their white hotel comforters and sheets. “Do you want a bath?”

“God, yes.” Avery started coughing again.

Seth put their groceries away in the hotel mini-fridge before helping Avery out of his clothes and into the tub, where he ran him a nice hot bath. He returned the wheelchair to the hallway before coming to sit with him.

He washed his hair for him. Avery shut his eyes and lay back. 

“That guy seemed pretty nice. What was his name?”

“Conrad.”

“Yeah. Too bad we’ll probably never see him again.”

“Yes. Part of the price we pay I guess.”

Avery nodded. “You sorry?”

“A little, yeah. I liked him a lot.”

“Think we’ll ever be able to have friends?”

“We can hope.”

“I’d like that. God, I’m tired.”

Seth checked his watch. “Hey, I can give you that medicine in like fifteen.” He washed Avery’s body for him since he was half asleep. “And then you can sleep.” The scars on Avery’s belly from where he’d slid on the hay were mostly faded now but Seth noticed new bruises, probably from sleeping on the floor.

He held his arm so he wouldn’t slip getting out of the tub and toweled him off.

“My mouth tastes like ass,” Avery said.

Seth found their toothbrushes and they brushed their teeth. Avery yawned.

“Come on, I think we can do the medicine now,” Seth said. He led Avery to the bed and dug out the bag Conrad had given him. Inside was a glass bottle and a teaspoon. He measured out the medicine. 

Avery made a face. “Wow, that was … not my favorite.”

Seth laughed. “Bedtime.” He tucked him in. “Sweet dreams.”

Avery was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.

Seth took a shower and took some time to wash their dirty clothes in the tub, hanging them around the bathroom to dry. He ate a sandwich and some chips and went downstairs to return the wheelchair because he needed to stretch his legs. He was still hungry but he was used to that.

“Hey,” a voice said as he headed back to the elevator. He turned to see Conrad, holding a bag of food. “I thought you might be hungry.”


	14. Guess I'll Go Eat Worms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Oh, my God, is that a gun?”

Chapter Fourteen

1993  
Mynah’s Creek

“Where the hell did I leave my pants?” Seth asked, looking around the well-appointed room. Like its owner, the apartment had class.

“Sure you won’t stay?” Magnus asked, lighting a cigarette. He was still sprawled on the bed.

“I can’t do that to Avery. He’d be up all night worrying and I can’t call him because we lost our cell phones.” He found his pants and pulled them on.

“Well, then, we’ll just have to get you some new ones,” Magnus drawled, smiling.

“You do that.” Seth grinned back as he buckled his trousers. He reached for his shirt and put that on as well.

“Don’t forget your gun,” Magnus said.

Seth rolled his eyes. “Wouldn’t want to forget that.”

Magnus snorted.

Seth finished getting dressed, gun and all. “See you soon.”

Magnus got up and pulled on a robe. “I’ll walk you out.”

He kissed him goodbye at the door. Seth heard the bolt turning as he headed down the stairs. Unlike their building, Magnus’s had an elevator but Seth preferred the stairs when the state of his ribs allowed. He was feeling mostly better these days, for which he was grateful.

Their apartment building was a quarter mile closer to town on the same road, which wove along the river. It was late, or early, depending on your point of view. Seth took the stairs to their apartment two at a time and opened the door to find Avery waiting for him.

‘Hey.”

“Hey.” He shut the door and locked it before turning toward Avery.

“Oh my god. What happened to your lip? Did you get in a fight?”

Seth checked his face in the mirror near the door and noticed he had a few new scratches. “Uh, no. I had sex with Magnus.”

Avery was silent for what felt like a full minute. “Oh,” he managed finally.

Seth was not in the mood to get into this. “I need a shower.” He took off his jacket.

“Oh, my God, is that a gun?”

Seth looked at it. “I need it for my job.”

“You’re a _librarian_!”

“Well, you know, those overdue fines aren’t gonna pay themselves.”

“This isn’t funny!” Avery seemed on the verge of tears.

Seth sighed and took off the gun, laying it on the kitchen counter. 

“Who even are you? You hate guns!”

“Avery, please calm down.”

“I don’t want to calm down! Don’t tell me to fucking calm down!”

Seth reached for him but he pulled away. 

“I can’t believe you slept with him. You barely know him.”

“I told you when we met sex and love are not the same thing for me.”

“Are you going to move out?” Avery’s voice was barely audible.

“What? No. Of course not.”

“Don’t I make you happy?”

Seth sighed. “Come sit outside with me. I’ll make us some drinks.”

Avery stared at him, then stormed off to the balcony without comment.

Seth poured Avery a glass of red wine and himself a whiskey, neat, and brought it out. Avery was looking out over the river. He was wearing the blue and white striped pants he slept in and the pink shirt with the kitty on it.

“Come sit down,” Seth coaxed.

Avery shook his head. Seth set their drinks down and went to stand next to him. Avery was crying silently.

“Oh, Babe. Hey.” Seth refrained from touching him, afraid of upsetting him more.

Avery wiped his face with the back of his hand. “I just don’t understand.”

“I meant it when I said I want you in my life, always. I just … you can’t be the only one in my life. I’m not wired that way. I don’t think it’s right, or fair, to expect one person to be my everything. And if I have to be that for you I’d start to resent it. If you want honesty, I already resent it a little.”

Avery stared at him, then started to cry again.

Seth had never felt so helpless. He reached for Avery tentatively and this time he let him hold him.

“I just … wanted us to be happy here and everything would be good and … “

“We can be happy here. Things can be good. Avery.” He leaned back a bit, still holding him.

Avery looked up.

“I love this place. I love being with you in it. I like our apartment. I like coming home to you.”

“But you resent me.”

“I don’t resent you. I resent being your everything, all the time. I feel like I’m being smothered.”

Avery looked at him with big hurt eyes.

“Come sit.” Seth led him to one of their new deck chairs and pulled him down on the same chair as him, his legs around him. Avery sat there stiffly. “I realize it feels like your paradise is falling down but it’s really not. We have a home now, and that means meeting new people, expanding our acquaintances. I told you when we met that I wasn’t built for monogamy. I need to be free to sleep with other people, to care about other people, but that doesn’t diminish how I feel about you.”

“But what if you decide you like one of them better?”

“I don’t measure my friendships that way. And if it makes you feel better most trolls prefer their own homes. You might have noticed that Rory and Magnus don’t live together, for example. I prefer to live here, with you, if you’ll have me.”

“But not sleep here every night.”

“No.”

Avery looked down.

“I know we’ve been together four years and this feels out of the blue, but it really isn’t. I told you what I was like when we met, while you were still deciding who you were and how you felt about things, so I know it’s not fair to expect you to be entirely OK with this just like that. But I’ve never lied to you.”

Avery nodded, still looking at his hands. “Do you really feel smothered?”

“Not usually. Just, lately. I’d be happier if you went out with your friends once in awhile. You don’t have to invite me to everything.”

Avery looked up. “So you don’t want to come to the Double Take?”

“Actually, that sounds nice. I’d like to go there. I just mean, you can make plans without me. Magnus said he’d get us some cell phones and that way we can always check in. I came home tonight because I didn’t want you to worry where I was.”

“And you resent that?”

“No. But I admit that having a cell phone would mean more freedom, and I would have liked to stay because I like Magnus’s company. Not more or less than yours. Just, we clicked.”

“Is that what they’re calling it now,” Avery said dryly.

Seth laughed. “There you are. Knew my old salty Avery was in there somewhere.”

“Fjordan hit on me.”

“Of course he did. He has eyes.”

Avery smiled a little, then frowned again. “So you’re saying if I jumped his bones you wouldn’t care?”

“Nope. But if you were going to spend the night a text would be considerate. Or, you know, if you wanted this place to yourselves.”

Avery shrugged, nodded, stared off into space for a bit. Seth left him to his thoughts.

“I’m still not sure I understand this,” Avery said finally.

“Well, I mean, think about your parents. Do you think monogamy made your mom happier? Because let’s face it, who gives a rat’s turd about your dad.”

Avery laughed a little. “No, actually. I mean, when I think about I think she was a little afraid of him.”

“And dependent on him, right? I mean, who wants to live that way?”

“But I mean, a good marriage …. “

“I’m not saying they don’t exist. I just think they’re rare. Most people are happier with a support network of friends and family. Clade, the trolls call it. It’s good for you, it’s good for me. I think we have a real good chance of finding that here. And if I’m being a butt you have someone to complain to.”

Avery nodded, glancing at him. “You say if as if it’s not a regular occurrence.”

Seth guffawed. Avery giggled a little, then started to cry again. Seth pulled him to his chest and he softened, leaning against him.

Seth kissed his temple and let him cry.

“I’m still not happy about the gun,” Avery said, finally, sniffling.

Seth sighed. ‘Me, either, to be honest, but Magnus made some very good points about why they’re needed in our line of work.”

“Because you know, library patrons … “ Avery smiled a little.

Seth laughed. “Yeah, they’re an unruly bunch.”

Avery nodded, laughing a bit.

“We good?” He touched his hand.

Avery nodded again.

“Good, because I need a shower and then I’m going to have that drink. You don’t have to wait for me but I wouldn’t mind.” He shoved Avery gently so he’d move and stood up.

Once he was in the shower he closed his eyes and just stood in the hot water for awhile. He cared so much about Avery that sometimes he’d been in danger of compromising himself, and he couldn’t allow that to happen. If this relationship was going to last he needed to stick to who he was, and he really wanted it to last. He didn’t want to imagine his life without Avery in it. But a life spent ignoring the temptations of other lovers wasn’t something he wanted, either. Giving in on that front was a slippery slope, and he’d just end up resenting the whole situation. He hoped Avery would understand that that was just part of who he was. He really didn’t want to be asked to choose.

Avery had gone to bed when Seth got out so he sat by himself on the balcony, staring out at the river, drinking his whiskey. He knew this wasn’t the end of it but he needed to give his boy time to think things over. He knew there were things he needed to say, too, but the words hadn’t formed in his brain yet. And also, if he had to admit it, he was a little scared. 

Avery was gone when he woke up. He’d left a note: Gone shopping was all it said. Seth had work, so they didn’t see each other until that evening, when it was time to meet Kiver and Fee at the docks.

Pay in that town was pretty good, with no more emphasis being put on any particular job. Seth didn’t really care for the 9 to 5 life but the woman in charge of the library, a troll named Alanis, didn’t seem to mind when he showed up as long as the books got shelved. The other librarian, a bronzeblood named Rozeta, liked practicing their telekinesis on the books. They did not have talent on Kiver’s level and Seth often ended up helping to pick the books back up, but he didn’t mind. He liked Rozeta, who told stupid jokes and liked to argue about dumb shit with him. Today’s debate had been about what qualified something as a sandwich.

“Is it the bread? Is a taco a sandwich?” Rozeta asked as they took the books off a shelf that was listing to the side so they could fix it.

“I’d say so. It’s a bready conveyance meant to keep the food from escaping.”

They laughed. “So, a sandwich is a food jail?”

“Pretty much.”

The conversation had gotten even sillier, with Rozeta trying to think of crimes a ham might do, which kept Seth’s mind off of Avery for a bit so he was grateful. He suggested that being overly delicious was probably one of the crimes you could hold food for and Rozeta agreed. They’d ended up going out for sandwiches for lunch, because of the power of suggestion, yet another food crime according to Rozeta.

When Avery got home Seth was dressed for their date, wearing a new off-white suit and light blue shirt, with shoes that weren’t Italian but did say I know how to dress like a goddamned grownup.

“Hi.”

Avery looked at him. “Hi.” He looked sad.

“Have a good day?”

Avery shrugged and set down the bags he was carrying. “Bought some food. Hung out with some of the guys from work.”

Seth nodded. “Need help putting the food away?”

“Uh, sure, I could get changed while you do that.”

“No problem.”

Seth put away the food. He wanted to say the magic words to make Avery feel better but for once wasn’t sure what they were. 

Avery took a quick shower and emerged in his new suit, which was light blue, and a pink shirt. He wore white canvas tennis shoes.

“You look good,” Seth said.

Avery nodded but didn’t smile. “Thanks.”

They locked up and made their way to the docks, which were near Fizbee’s. Seth had to bite his tongue several times on the walk over. He had nothing constructive to say, but patience wasn’t his strong suit. He just wanted everything to be fine again but he knew he had to respect Avery’s process. Avery for his part seemed lost in thought.

Fee and Kiver were waiting in a boat covered with various paintings, with an iron hoop around the seating area. Fee wore a sleeveless black T-shirt, red plaid pants with zippers on them, and combat boots. Kiver wore a pink halter sundress with bees on it and a white frilly underdress. Her hair was somewhat combed and she wore a pink bow in her hair.

“Well, look at you two,” Fee said as they approached. “Guess we all had the urge to gussy up a bit.” His fingernails were painted black and he wore a lot of black eye makeup. Seth hadn’t spent a lot of time in Fee’s company as of yet but found himself digging the man’s aesthetic.

“You guys look great,” Seth said.

Avery nodded.

“Oh, hey, Magnus asked me to give you these.” Fjordan handed them each a cell phone. He looked at Seth’s face and raised an eyebrow. “Number’s taped to the phone.”

“Oh, cool, thanks.” Seth memorized the number before pocketing his. Avery had mentioned that Fee and Magnus were lovers, so Seth figured he’d just been found out thanks to his bit-up lip. Magnus’s teeth were fairly unique. He hoped it wouldn’t be a problem.

Avery shrugged and put his phone away without looking at it.

They got into the boat, which Kiver proceeded to steer using her green magic. Fee sat next to her, Seth and Avery across from them, facing back the way they came.

“I have to ask,” Seth said. He was talking more than usual to make up for Avery’s silence. “What’s with the iron hoop?” He’d seen them on several boats. They didn’t seem practical for rowing. You’d think they’d get in the way.

“Protection from fairies,” Fee said. He seemed to have cooled off a bit toward Seth.

Seth laughed but stopped. “You’re serious.”

“Welcome to the deep swamp.”

“Holy shit. Have you seen any?”

“Nearly got eaten alive by some. Angry little glowy puffs the size of tennis balls.” Fee said, warming to his story.

“Holy crap.”

“Yeah, scary moment.” 

Kiver laughed. “You loved every minute of it.”

Fjordan grinned at her. “Guilty as charged. Can’t say the same for Magnus.”

Kiver cackled. “Nope.”

“So picture this, the three of us in a floating row boat flying as fast as Kiver’s magics can carry us, over a moonlit river, being chased by balls of light with teeth.”

Avery stared. “Sounds terrifying.”

Fee nodded. “It was. It was awesome.”

Seth laughed. Fee grinned at him, animosity apparently at least temporarily forgotten.

“You’re lucky you escaped,” Avery said.

Fee nodded. “Yeah. Made sure to get my boat reinforced after that. Circles of iron or silver keep the fairies away. If you go out in the swamp you should invest in a real silver necklace.” He fingered the one he wore, a silver chain from which dangled a feminine silver heart with a blue glass center. It was out of step with everything else he wore so Seth assumed it had sentimental meaning. Fee certainly seemed melancholy all of a sudden, just touching the thing. 

“Thanks. We’ll be sure to do so.”

Fee nodded. So did Avery, still wide eyed.

“So, like fairies are real?” His voice squeaked a bit.

“Yep,” Fee said, snapping himself out of wherever his thoughts had momentarily taken him. “Freaked me out too at first. The swamp is full of secrets, like stinging vines--these pretty red and green vines you absolutely should not touch--and dire raccoons.”

“What the fuck is a dire raccoon?” Seth asked.

“Like a regular raccoon but with glowing green eyes and evil intent, far as I can tell.”

“Was there some sort of industrial accident?” Avery asked.

“Nah, it’s just magic,” Kiver said. Her voice was deep and resonant and drawling. “Magic just lives here.” 

“Like fairy magic?” Avery asked.

“Well, fairies is magic, yeah.”

“I feel like I stepped into a fairy tale,” Avery said, looking around them. “I felt that before, when we just got here and I had to go ask Draygo for a job. It was like seeking an audience with the ogre king.”

Fee laughed. “Oh, he’s going to love that.”

Avery stared at him. “Fuck. You can’t tell him!”

Fee smiled. “I won’t if you don’t want me to, but he’d like it very much.”

Seth smiled and looked around. He could see what Avery meant about a fairy tale. Huge trees trailed ancient branches dripping moss like old women at a ball displaying their cashmere stoles. Fireflies danced above the water, flitting away from the occasional leaping fish. Birds sang, hidden from view, and Seth thought for a second he saw an alligator watching them before it vanished deeper into the swamp. The place had a majestic, sacred feel to it.

The group fell silent for a time and Kiver started to sing. She had a melodious mournful voice but the song she sang was uplifting, about a desert pump that operated on good faith. 

Seth laughed. He hadn’t heard that one in years. He joined in, and so did Fee after a bit. Fee had a pretty tenor voice. The three of them sounded good together, and when they stopped singing Avery clapped. 

Seth smiled at him and Avery smiled back, though he still looked sad.

“Double Take coming up,” Fee said, and the two of them turned to look.

The Double Take stood high on stilts above the swamp. Stairs led up from the dock underneath the restaurant, which had a wraparound porch overlooking the surroundings. It was a rough-hewn building with a large sign bearing its name and an infinity loop underneath that. Also featured were various vegetables and a lobster.

“We should get a table on the porch if we can,” Fee said. “Sunset’s soon, and the view is really something.”

Kiver nodded vigorously. She rowed the boat to the dock, still using magic, and Fee hopped out to tie it up. Seth and Avery got out and Seth ventured to put his arm around Avery, who leaned against him, making his heart skip an unexpected beat. He might be forgiven after all. He kissed the top of his head and Avery made a small noise.

Fee smiled at them. “This way to culinary heaven. One taste of the twins’ cooking and you’ll never want to go back.”

“Wait,” Avery said. “Twins? Double Take? Very clever. They’re identical, right?”

Fee laughed. “You’re quick.”

They headed up the stairs.

The restaurant was the sort where you ordered at the counter. There was a big chalkboard immediately to their left as they entered with the day’s specials written in chalk by someone with artistic talent. One of the items was “we’re all out of meatloaf so stop asking.” Avery saw it and laughed.

Seth was feeling unexpected emotions tonight, mostly protective toward Avery, who he just wanted to keep touching. He supposed he was just grateful Avery hadn’t locked him out of their place and seemed to be on his way to forgiving him.

“That must have been some meatloaf,” Avery said.

“Oh, it was,” Fee said. “So listen, the way I usually order is to let the twins make me whatever. It doesn’t seem terribly busy tonight so we might get away with it. You game? I can ask for cocktails to start, and by the way, dinner is on us.”

Seth started to protest but Fee cut him off.

“We can afford it and you two are still getting back on your feet. Please, allow us to spoil you a bit.”

“You’ve already done so much for us,” Seth said quietly.

“So, what’s one more thing? Making people happy makes me happy.”

“All right, then.” Seth said. He didn’t like being beholden but Fee felt like a safe person to owe a favor to.

Avery smiled at Fee. “Thank you.”

“And letting them surprise us sounds fun,” Seth said. “If they’re game.”

“I think they will be, especially once they meet you,” Fee said.

Kiver laughed.

“They’re horrible flirts,” Fee said in a loud sotto voice as they approached the counter.

“On the contrary,” said a fat troll with a pixie cut, a pink dress with an airplane print, and an apron that said Too Hot for You. “We’re very good flirts.” They were a beautiful goldblood whose horns were the shape of the infinity sign. “Marlow Lizard at your service, cutie pie, she/her,” she said to Avery, who smiled.

“I’m Avery.”

“Yes, you are,” she said, in a tone of voice that made Avery blush.

“Down girl, customers are not appetizers,” said her twin, who was emerging from the kitchen. They had longer hair in a bun, wore a blue Hawaiian print shirt, shorts, and flip-flops, and an apron that said Too Cool for You.

“Gang, this is Lucy Lizard, he/him,” Fjordan said. “Lucy, these are our new friends, Avery and Seth.”

Seth wasn’t sure how trolls, who as far as he knew hatched from separate eggs, got twin siblings but there you had it. Other than hairstyle, demeanor, and style of dress--Marlow’s look said 50’s rockabilly housewife while Lucy’s was beach bum who just rolled out of bed--they were absolutely identical.

Lucy gave Seth a lazy smile. “I’m glad to see the reports of you looking like hamburger were greatly exaggerated.”

Seth smiled. “Not really, but I got better.”

“Now who’s looking them over like a piece of meat,” Marlow said, and Fee cackled. “What can I get for you kids?” She winked at Kiver, who grinned.

“The usual, if it’s not too busy tonight, please,” Fee said.

“These two game?” Marlow asked.

Seth and Avery nodded.

“Well all right then, just for you, Fee.”

“Ta, dear. We’re going to nab a table on the porch.” Fee handed a couple of bills to the cashier. “Keep the smaller one for yourself, Reefe.”

Reefe, a bronzeblood who dressed like Velma from Scooby Doo might at the beach, with an orange tank top, large glasses and their hair in a bob, looked down at the money in their hand. “Wow, thanks.”

Fee shrugged. “You deserve it.”

They found a table by the railing that overlooked the swamp. Seth sat next to Avery and draped his arm across the back of his chair. Avery leaned into him, looking up briefly to smile. Seth leaned down and kissed his brow and Avery snuggled against him. Seth closed his eyes briefly and when he opened them Fee was looking at him with a kind expression. Seth regarded him briefly, not smiling, before resting his chin on Avery’s head. He disliked the feeling that people could see right through him and it occurred to him that Fee was a very good detective.

“Oh, look, the sun’s going down,” Avery said.

The four of them fell silent for a time, just watching the sun change the river to brilliant oranges and pinks.

“Fee! Come get your dates wasted! Drinks are up,” said a voice over the loudspeaker that sounded like a twin.

Avery giggled.

Kiver stood up. “I’ll get ‘em.”

“Do you need help?” Avery asked, looking up at her.

“Nah.” She sauntered into the cafe.

Fee watched her go. “Nice ass, baby.”

She looked over her shoulder and wiggled it at him.

He laughed. “God, I’m a lucky man.”

Seth figured there must be a lot to Kiver one didn’t immediately see for Fee to feel that way. She seemed nice, and was certainly sexy, but Fee didn’t strike him as shallow. His devotion to her made her an interesting enigma to Seth.

Avery moved under Seth’s chin to look at Fee. “She’s awesome.”

Fee beamed at him. “That she is.”

She returned shortly with their drinks. They were each a different color. “Lucy said pick our favorite. Dibs on the sunset-y one.” One of the drinks had orange, purple, and pink layers that somehow stayed separate. She sat down next to Fee and took a sip, ears wiggling happily.

“Ooh, pretty.” Avery sat up, disengaging from Seth so he could grab a bright pink drink from the tray. 

Fee took a deep purple cocktail, leaving Seth the neon blue one in the martini glass, which he would have chosen anyway. It was cool and crisp with a spicy aftertaste he couldn’t quite place. Cinnamon was the closest he could come to it.

Kiver grinned at Fee, who rolled his eyes. 

“What.”

“You know what. You picked the pur-ple one.”

“I like purple.”

“Uh huh.” Her grin grew.

“You’re incorrigible.”

She giggled. Fee shook his head. He avoided Seth’s eyes, and Seth understood. Purple equalled Magnus, whom Fjordan cared more than a little for. He was feeling threatened by Seth. Seth wished he could tell him there was no need but it seemed better saved for a private conversation.

Kiver licked Fee’s ear and he wiggled his head and laughed. 

“That was really yummy,” Avery said, setting down his glass.

“Yes, the twins are geniuses with a drink, and food,” Fee said, smiling at him with a touch of sadness. “Just wait.”

“Did someone call my name?” Lucy asked, arriving at their table with a tray of salads and setting one down in front of each of them. 

“Not sure anyone here said horndog,” Fee said, grinning at him.

“I distinctly heard the word genius,” Lucy said, patting the air around his ear.

“Those drinks were amazing,” Avery said.

“Why thank you. Nice someone appreciates me.”

“What about horndog equals lack of appreciation?” Fee asked.

Lucy laughed. “Good point. Forgot who I was talking to.” 

Fee and Kiver both laughed.

Lucy turned to Seth. “How was your drink?”

“I liked it. What was the spice?”

“Ah, that’s a secret.”

“It was nutmeg,” said a voice. Marlow had joined them. “Knew I’d find you out here flirting.”

“Why don’t you just sell the place, you’re giving away all our secrets anyway,” Lucy said.

“Maybe I will. Then I won’t have to work with you.”

“Go right ahead.”

“Your sauce is burning,” Marlow said.

“Why didn’t you say so?” Lucy ran back to the kitchen.

Marlow followed him, cackling.

Avery watched them go. “Are they always like that?”

“Yep, they’re a hoot.” Fee smiled at him. “Remind me of me and my sister.”

“Where does she live?”

“Dublin.”

“Wow, that’s a long way away.”

“Yeah. She visited me here, seemed to like it. I admit it’d be nice if she moved here but she’s got her own clade back home.”

Avery nodded, glancing at Seth. “Clade is a troll word, right?”

“Yes,” Fjordan said as they all dug into their salads, which were each a bit different. “One of her family members is a troll.”

“Oh, right. That would make sense. Wow, this salad is amazing. Did everyone get mandarin oranges?”

“Papaya,” Kiver said. She offered him a fork and they traded bites. Fee smiled at the two of them.

Seth’s salad had pomegranate, which he appreciated. He’d never been big on overly sweet food. The twins seemed to have an uncanny ability to guess what a guest might like. He wondered idly if magic was involved. 

“Are they some kind of wizards?” Avery asked, echoing Seth’s thoughts.

“Nah,” Kiver said. “They just know food.”

“They really are geniuses,” Avery said.

“Shhhh,” Fee said, winking. “There’ll be no living with them.”

Avery laughed. Seth smiled fondly at him. Once more he noticed Fee watching them, smiling. Fee looked down at his salad when Seth met his eyes.

“So how do I pay my cell phone bill?” Seth asked Fee after a bit.

“Oh, right, yes, just get a bank account at the local bank to cover it. It’s run by a human with all the whatchacallits--accreditations? Or is that university?” He shrugged. “Anyway, it’s a bona fide bank so you can write checks to the celly company. Just drop your mail in the box outside the community center. They can sell you a stamp. Jo picks it up once a week and takes it to Morgan City. If you’re expecting mail you can pick it up at the community center, too. Sunnie keeps it locked up. She runs the place.”

Seth nodded. “Thanks.”

“Sure. I had tons of questions when I first moved here. Glad to pass on what wisdom I’ve gleaned.”

“Bona fide.” Kiver snorted.

Avery giggled. “Sounds like boner fide.”

Kiver nodded, laughing.

Fee shook his head. “You two are infants.”

Kiver stuck out her tongue at him and made a noise that sounded like pttttthhhh.

“Was that supposed to be a raspberry?” He seemed amused.

She pouted. “My teeth are too big.”

He kissed her. “I like your teeth.”

“Kiver and the cutie pie in pink and blue, come get your food.” The loudspeaker demanded.

Fee chortled. “Marlow likes you.”

“Um, that’s nice?” Avery said.

“Don’t let her eat him alive,” Fee told Kiver as she and Avery got up. “Unless he’s into it.”

Avery blushed and Seth laughed. Avery stuck out his tongue at him and Seth grinned.

Fee watched them go. “I rather like Avery.”

Seth nodded. “Shows you have taste.”

“He’s so open and unafraid of expressing himself,” Fee said, taking a sip of water.

Seth cocked an eyebrow at him.

“Almost as if someone’s been looking out for him for four years. Someone who maybe has a hell of a lot more reasons to distrust the world.”

“What’s your point?” Seth asked, suddenly wary.

Fee shrugged. “I don’t have a point, other than I see what Magnus sees in you. You’re a lot like me, actually.”

“How so?” Seth took a sip of water for a reason to look away from those piercing wolf-like eyes.

“We both gave up a lot to protect the people we love.”

Seth frowned. “That’s not how it is.”

“Oh? Forgive me for projecting, in that case.”

“I didn’t give anything up,” Seth said quietly, hating himself for feeling close to tears. “You have it backwards. He gave everything to me and I’m … just a selfish bastard.” He looked over the water.

“No, you’re not. You’re a scared kid who protected you both. Of course he loves you. Hell, I half love you and I barely know you.”

“Fjordan, don’t take this the wrong way but shut the fuck up.”

Fjordan nodded. “Shutting up now.”

Kiver and Avery came back with their food. Kiver sat down and looked between the two of them. She stabbed a piece of meat from her plate and stuck it in her mouth.

Avery looked at Seth, and then at Fjordan, and frowned. “Everything OK?”

Seth nodded, sniffed. “Yeah. Yeah.” He gave Avery a smile that he knew wasn’t very convincing. 

“Okaay,” Avery said, eyeing Fee. He turned to his food.

Seth stood up. “I need to use the restroom.” He walked off, not even sure where they were, just took an educated guess and entered the cafe. It was a small room so the loo was easy enough to find. It was one unisex room with a stall and a sink. Thankfully it was empty. He put his hands on the sink and looked down, trying to compose himself.

The door opened after a while and Avery came in, looking timid. “What did he say to you?”

Seth shook his head, sniffed. “Nothing bad.”

“Then what?” Avery put his hand on his shoulder. “Why are you so upset?”

“He just hit a little close to home.”

Avery nodded. “I told him to mind his own business.”

Seth laughed a little. “Standing up for me?”

“Fuck yeah. No one messes with my man.”

Seth looked at him and gave him a crooked smile. “Is that so.”

“Darned tootin.”

Seth started laughing. “Oh my god. You sound like a southern grandmother. Not mine, because she’s not charming, but fuck.”

Avery laughed a little too. Seth kissed his forehead. 

“Come on, I’m hungry.”

“OK.” Avery seemed a little deflated. Seth felt bad, guessing that he was hoping for some sort of big revealing moment, but this wasn’t the time.

Seth took his hand when they left the restroom and squeezed his fingers. “Thanks.”

Avery smiled at him shyly. “Of course. I wasn’t sure if I should come but Kiver convinced me.”

“She did, huh.”

“Yeah. She’s very perceptive I think.”

“She’s not the only one. Her boyfriend’s a goddamned fortune cookie.”

Avery giggled, but then fell serious. “You ever going to tell me what he said?”

“Maybe.”

Avery frowned, nodded, dropped Seth’s hand. They resumed their seats.

“I am sorry,” Fee said. “I talk too much.”

Seth shrugged but didn’t contradict him. “Let’s talk about something else,” he said.

“I like worms,” Kiver said.

Seth laughed. “You mean to eat or just you know, in general?”

“Both.”

Avery looked at her in horror. “You’re kidding.”

“They’re tasty!” She said. “Real. Slorp. Squish. They got that real slorp squish.”

Seth started giggling. He couldn’t help it. Avery put his fork down. Kiver grinned at them across the table.

“Personally I find them a little wiggly,” he said. He’d eaten them more than once as a child, the first time on a dare, subsequent times because he and Malcolm had been having too much fun to go home for a snack.

“Mmmm,” Kiver said. “That’s the good part.”

Avery stared at him. “You’ve eaten them too?”

“Yep.” He grinned at him.

“Oh, my god. Why?”

Seth shrugged. “Why not?”

Kiver said at the same time, “Because they’re good that’s why.”

“I’m--” Avery looked at Fjordan. “Have you?”

“Nah, but I was a city boy.”

Avery looked at him.

“You gotta try worms, Babe,” Kiver said.

“Harder to dig through the cement to find them,” Fee explained to Avery. “And yes, I daresay I should.”

“I’ll catch you some worms.”

Avery looked positively green.

“Not from our yard because they probably been eating that salmonella dirt but I’ll find you some good worms.”

Fee laughed. “I think we should stop and let the poor boy enjoy his meal. But yes, that would be lovely.”

“Worms,” Kiver said gutturally, to the sky.

Seth was helpless with laughter.

“New topic, please, for the love of god,” Avery begged.

Kiver burst out giggling. “How about beetles?”

Seth almost fell off his chair.

“You guys!” Avery sounded frantic.

“They got a spicy cronch.” She could barely talk for giggling.

“I’m .. just not gonna listen.” Avery said primly, eating his food determinedly.

“OK, OK, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I mean not really but I’m a little sorry.” Kiver said.

Seth laughed. “Good.”

“Wait, for what?”

“For not being that sorry. That was hilarious.”

She grinned brightly at him, full of joy and Seth could see now, a little, what Fee might see in her.

Avery muttered, “You guys are gross.”

“You’re gross,” Kiver mimicked him.

Fee laughed. “Be nice, Kiver. The boy’s trying to finish his food in peace.”

Kiver tried another attempt at a raspberry but broke it off in a “Yeah, OK.” 

They finished their meal, Seth still giggling. Avery glared at him. Seth laughed harder, holding up his hands. 

“Sorry, sorry.”

“No, you’re not.”

“No, you’re right. I’m not.”

Avery shook his head. “Just glad we’re not having spaghetti.”

The other three lost it.


	15. Partners

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Oh my god are you beautiful,” Seth said quietly.

Chapter Fifteen  
1989  
Columbus, Ohio

“So I’m not gonna ask if you’re in some sort of trouble,” Conrad said over the ham, rolls, and potato salad he’d brought them. The two were talking quietly at the table in the hotel room while Avery slept. Seth knew that very little would wake him when he was this tired and he wanted to be there in case he was needed. “I will ask, is there anything I can do to help?” 

Seth regarded him. “That’s really kind of you but no, apart from what you’ve done already, that is. We’ll be fine once Avery’s had a chance to rest.” 

“Things must have been pretty bad back home for you to choose sleeping in an abandoned warehouse instead.”

“They were.”

Conrad nodded. “I know I’m lucky. My gran’s pretty cool.”

“It’s just you and her, then?”

“Yeah. My parents died in a car crash when I was nine.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, I mean, I’ve had ten years to get over it but I still miss them.”

“I know what you mean. I was ten when my mom died.”

"Sucks, man.”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t suppose you two would consider sticking around for a bit,” Conrad said, looking at the table.

“We really can’t.” Seth said.

Conrad shrugged. “Yeah, I guess not. Just bein’ selfish. The pickings are pretty slim around here, queer wise.”

Seth laughed humorlessly. “Yeah, I get that.”

“It’s not a real great town to be out in, to be honest.”

Seth nodded. “Is any town?”

Conrad laughed. “Yeah, good point. Anyway, I mean we barely know each other but …. “

“It would have been cool, yeah,” Seth said. 

Conrad looked at his hands.

Seth leaned in and kissed him. Conrad kissed him back hungrily. They ended up falling onto the floor, Seth on top, Conrad’s hand already fumbling with his jean zipper.

“Oh, shit, shit, shit.”

“Shhhhhh….”

Half laughing, half breathless,they rolled around on the narrow strip of floor between the far bed and the outer wall, kissing and jerking each other off. Seth watched Conrad’s face as he came, the fluttering eyelids, the complete loss of control, and ended up coming too, all over Conrad’s naked stomach. 

He collapsed on top of Conrad, who laughed and kissed his forehead. Seth suddenly felt hot and extremely dizzy and rolled off of him. 

Conrad looked at him. “Man, you even whiter than usual.”

Seth groaned. “Uh, I think I’m sick. Sorry, that probably means you’re gonna get it, too.”

“Totally worth it. Come on, I’ll get you to bed.”

Seth felt like he was made of sand. “That was quick.”

“Gran always says, the healthier they are, the harder it hits ‘em.” Conrad hauled him upright. “Come on. I’ll get you cleaned up.”

Conrad helped him to the shower--Avery was still sound asleep--and got in with him, holding him so he wouldn’t fall. Seth felt like all of his weight was in his feet. Conrad washed the cum from both of their bodies and kissed the side of his neck. Seth smiled at him.

“You’re burning up,” Conrad said. He somehow got Seth toweled off and gave him some of granny’s tonic--Avery hadn’t been wrong, it was nasty--and got him into bed next to Avery.

“You going to be OK?” He asked as he pulled on his jeans.

“Just gonna sleep,” Seth said, already halfway there.

“I’ll check on you tomorrow if I don’t have it too by then.” Conrad finished getting dressed. “I’ll put this food in the fridge for you.”

Seth nodded. “Thanks.”

“Seth?”

He looked at him.

“Thank you. That was amazing.”

Seth smiled sleepily. “Yeah.”

“Bye for now.”

“Bye for now.”

Conrad saw himself out and Seth didn’t remember anything else for a while.

When he woke up Avery was cuddling him. “You were talking in your sleep.”

Seth rolled over and smiled at him. “Did I spill any state secrets?”

“Mmmm. Something about elephants.”

“Well, don’t tell the secret service.”

Avery giggled.

“You feeling better?” Seth asked him.

“A little, yeah, but it’d be nice to sleep another day. I asked them at the front desk and they said we could extend our stay through tomorrow so I did. Hope that’s OK.”

Seth nodded. “I think I need to rest until then at least.” He coughed. His chest felt heavy. “What time is it?”

“Um, like midnight.”

“I should have some more of that cold stuff.”

“Yeah, I don’t know what’s in it but I feel a lot better.” Avery got up and Seth’s back was suddenly cold. He shivered. “I’ll get some for you.”

“OK, then come right back. I’m freezing.”

Avery laughed. “OK, OK, hold your horses.”

“You’re in a good mood.”

“Well, I get to take care of you for a change. I mean, I’m not happy you’re sick, I’m just glad to be here for you.” Seth felt the bed sag slightly as Avery returned. “Can you sit up? I think this would be easier.”

Seth sat up.

“How much am I supposed to give you?”

“Two teaspoons.”

Avery did that. The taste had not improved.

“Oh my god, your face.” Avery giggled. “You look like a wet cat.”

“Yeah, that stuff is bleah.” Seth stuck out his tongue. He got up carefully. The lightheaded feeling seemed to have gone away, so that was something. “I need to pee.”

“You gonna get there OK?”

“I think so.” He started coughing, and had to grab the wall for support. Avery hovered nearby.

Avery accompanied him to the bathroom and helped him back to bed. Seth was shivering uncontrollably by that point and Avery climbed in, too, wrapping his body around his.

“Thanks for taking care of me,” Seth said.

“Of course, dummy,” Avery said, fondly, and kissed his ear.

Maybe it was the sickness talking but in that moment being taken care of felt good, and safe, and peaceful. Seth let his ever-constant guard down and drifted into sleep, knowing Avery would take care of things, should they arise.

Two days later they were on a bus headed south. Avery’s fake ID was holding up and Seth figured they’d muddied the trail enough with all of their zig-zagging across the country. The south was what he knew, and the climate was better if you didn’t have a roof to call your own. And who knows, maybe they’d find that shack in the swamp they’d daydreamed about.

Avery was quiet, staring out the window as the bus pulled away from Columbus. Seth felt pensive as well. Conrad hadn’t visited again and his grandmother had declared him too sick to come to the phone when Seth had called, so he hadn’t had a chance to say goodbye, something he didn’t often want to do. He told himself it was better this way, though he knew he was kidding himself. They could have been good, but this was the life he’d chosen. What the hell would a guy like him do in Columbus fucking Ohio.

He wanted to put his arm around Avery but this was a public space. He settled for nudging him with his shoulder. Avery looked up and smiled briefly.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” Avery replied.

“You seem lost in thought.”

Avery shrugged. “Just thinking.”

“That’s what lost in thought generally means,” Seth said, laughing.

Avery rolled his eyes and laughed a little.

“Care to share?”

“It’s nothing,” Avery said, looking away again in a way that definitely said it wasn’t nothing. 

“Uh huh.”

Avery stole a glance in his direction. “It’s just … it’s been a month.”

“A month since what--ohhh.” Holy shit. They’d been together a month? It felt shorter, and longer at the same time. “You want to know if … “

Avery glanced at him again, his eyes full of hopeful longing and Seth couldn’t bring himself to tease him.

“Avery, my life is so much better with you in it.”

Avery smiled at him, a slow wondrous smile that changed his whole face.

“Oh my god are you beautiful,” Seth said quietly.

Avery looked down, pleased but embarrassed. He looked up again and frowned. Seth followed the direction of his gaze and noticed a white man who had turned around in his seat across the aisle and was staring unpleasantly at them. He was stocky, with a roundish face and a close-cut beard, wearing a baseball cap and a flannel shirt. Seth avoided his gaze.

He and Avery glanced at each other. Avery looked out the window, following Seth’s cue.

Several unpleasant minutes passed. Seth could feel the man’s gaze on him but resolutely refused to look his way.

“You two homosexuals?” The man drawled after a while.

Seth turned to look at him. “We’re a little young for you.”

Someone nearby stifled a laugh.

It seemed to take awhile for what Seth had said to register, but then the man’s expression turned from ugly to mean. “Think you’re funny, do you?”

Seth shrugged. “Just sayin.’”

“God don’t hold with homos and neither do I. You know what we do with homos where I come from?” the man said.

Seth rolled his eyes. “I don’t know, take them to prom?” he drawled. A couple more people laughed, which was what Seth had wanted. It was easier to side with someone if they made you laugh and he was hoping some other adult would step in before this got too nasty. 

Beside him Avery sat silent. Seth could feel how scared he was from the tense way he held his body and that made him angry on his behalf. He’d be damned if he was going to back down. He knew acting scared in this situation would just embolden the guy. It really was a no-win situation.

“You think you’re real smart, sitting on this here bus with all these witnesses. You’d be talking different if I had you alone.”

Seth sighed. “You do realize propositioning a minor is illegal in most states, right?”

“Why you little--” the man got up but so did a very large black man who was sitting behind the boys, as did a large middle-aged white woman sitting across the aisle from him.

“Sit down,” the man commanded. 

The woman brandished her large heavy purse. “You best sit,” she said. “You leave those boys alone and mind your own p’s and q’s or I’m gonna demand the driver throw you off the bus.”

“Is there a problem?” the driver said over the loudspeaker.

“Is there a problem?” the large black man asked the belligerent man, his voice a deep rumble.

The man sized him up. Standing, he was up to his chest. “No,” he said.

“We’ve got it under control,” the black man told the driver. “You boys change seats with me and my son,” he said.

Seth nodded, and he and Avery got up. The angry man sat down. 

“Thank you, sir,” Seth said as they changed seats. The man’s son looked to be about nine and was staring wide-eyed at everyone.

“Gotta set a good example for my kid. People deserve respect,” the man said simply as he sat down.

The woman with the purse did not sit. “You can have my seat,” she told the angry man’s seatmate. “This man and I gonna have a conversation.”

“Gladly,” said the young man, who was cute and white and wearing a college hoodie. He grabbed his backpack and traded seats with the lady.

“Now then, you and I are gonna talk about what it means to be a good Christian,” she said. “Or rather, I’m gonna talk and you’re gonna listen. Budge over.”

The man glared at her but did as she said. She launched into a lecture. Seth tuned her out, though he did hear words like “ashamed of yourself” and “children.” He turned to Avery, who was hunched down into himself. “We watch to see if the guy is getting off, and if he isn’t, let’s just ditch this bus first chance, OK?” He said quietly.

Avery nodded emphatically. “I hate him,” he whispered. “I just wanted to have a nice conversation with you … “ he wiped his nose with the back of his hand.

Seth nodded. “I think we should best stay quiet for the rest of this ride, avoid buses from now on.”

Avery nodded again. “Yeah.” He started to cry silently.

Seth felt helpless. He wanted to comfort Avery but thought hugging him was pushing his luck. “Oh, fuck, hey … “

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I just … “

Avery nodded, wiped his face. “Yeah, I know.” He looked defeated.

Seth felt tired. He still wasn’t completely over being sick, but he didn’t feel it was safe to sleep. He started coughing. Avery sat up and rummaged in the suitcase and poured him a thermos capful of water.

“Thanks.”

The unpleasant man started wailing loudly about how his mother had never loved him and the Christian woman with the large purse was saying, “let it out, honey,” and Seth wanted to climb the walls. The next stop couldn’t come soon enough.

Two hours later the driver announced they were in Huntington, West Virginia. The man had fallen silent with only an occasional Praise Jesus and showed no inclination to leave the bus so Seth and Avery shambled gratefully off. Seth’s fever had returned. He felt clammy and out of it.

“This way,” Avery said, taking the suitcase in one hand and Seth’s arm with the other. “I see a hotel.”

“We’re gonna be broke at this rate,” Seth said, following him.

“Tough. You’re still sick and we need a safe place to sleep.”

“Tough, huh,” he said, smiling.

“Yep.” The hotel was only a couple of blocks from the bus station. It was a hot sticky afternoon but the inside of the hotel was hushed and cool. Avery led Seth to a chair in the lobby and handed him the suitcase. “Sit.”

He came back shortly with a room key and led him to the elevator. Seth was feeling spacey as they rode the elevator and walked to their room. It was standard fare, with peach and tan furnishings and two beds. 

“Sit on the bed,” Avery said, and when Seth obeyed he helped him off with his shoes, which Seth was grateful for because they suddenly seemed very far away. Avery got him a glass of water and two painkillers. “Lie down for a bit,” he said. “I can get us some food when you wake up.”

Seth took the painkillers. “What time is it?”

Avery checked Seth’s watch. “Two thirty seven p.m.” He released his wrist and took the empty water glass from him and set it on the nightstand.

“Feels later.”

“You’re sick, that’s why.” Avery pulled off his watch and shirt for him and unbuckled his jeans. “Kick these off and get under the covers.”

“Bossy,” Seth said, but did as he was told.

Avery covered him up and sat down next to him on the bed with the remote. “TV gonna bother you?”

“Doubt it,” Seth said, and then he didn’t remember much else for a while.

Avery ordered them room service when Seth woke up, steak again but with soup, salad and potatoes because Avery said he missed vegetables and Seth thought soup sounded good. They watched cable television after they ate, lying cuddled up on the bed under the covers. Seth felt a lot better after his long nap but lying down still felt like the best position to be in. He wanted to take a shower but he also did not want to move.

“Did you mean it?” Avery said, his eyes on the movie.

“Mean what?” Seth yawned and snuggled in further.

“That I make your life better,” Avery said, his ears going a bit red.

“Yes.” 

Avery looked at him. “So, like, you want to stay together?”

Seth took the remote and turned off the television. “Yes.”

Avery nodded. “So, we’re partners?”

“Fifty-fifty.” If he wanted to be truthful, they’d been full partners the whole time. He just wanted an out at the beginning in case things didn’t work out. But clearly, they had. “You’re more than just a partner, you’re a friend, and you’ve shown I can rely on you when I need to.”

Avery smiled, a nice sweet smile, and dipped his head.

“There’s that smile again.”

Avery’s eyes fluttered in his direction.

“Helen of Troy wishes she had a smile like that.”

Avery chuckled a little. “You’re too sick for sex.”

Seth laughed. “I can’t just give you a compliment?”

Avery grinned. “Sure. I just know you.”

“Touche. And yes, sadly, you’re right.”

“Movie?” Avery picked up the remote.

“Sounds good.”

Avery turned on the television again and slid his arm around Seth’s shoulders. Seth leaned against him, feeling warm and content, ignoring the inner voice that warned him it was dangerous to get used to this.


	16. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was in a reckless mood. He wanted to get drunk and avoid how he was feeling and have sex with strangers and not give a fuck about anything.

Chapter Sixteen

1993  
Mynah’s Creek

“Welcome to the party!” Fjordan said as he opened the door. He was wearing a ridiculous hat that looked like a cross between a burger and a turtle perched awkwardly on his very starched mohawk, a sequined purple tailcoat over his bare chest, and a pair of very tight black jeans tucked into his usual combat boots. “What’ll you have to drink?”

“Um, don’t suppose you have that pink drink I had at the Double Take,” Avery said. He was alone. Seth had been off running errands for Draygo and said he would meet him at the party later. Avery was determined to be a good poly boyfriend and not think about what other side errands Seth might get up to.

“We have pink wine!” Fjordan clearly had started the drinking early.

“Good enough,” Avery smiled at him and allowed himself to be escorted to the bar, where Korrum, one of his coworkers from St. Sedition’s, a cute little cerulean blood with a scene haircut, was tending, wearing hir rollerskates as usual. “Hey, Korrum.”

Korrum gave him a double finger gun salute. “What can I get you?”

“Pink wine, please.”

“White girl special coming up.”

Avery was about to protest but stopped and shrugged. “Fair.” He downed it in one gulp. “Another, please.” He was in a reckless mood. He wanted to get drunk and avoid how he was feeling and have sex with strangers and not give a fuck about anything.

Korrum raised an eyebrow, but poured him another one. Avery took it with him this time. Other guests were milling about and a beautiful old fashioned gramophone with a green bell played Billie Holiday.

Fjordan and Kiver’s house looked like it had been a cabin at one time but had been renovated to expand the living area and add a screened deck that extended over the swamp behind the house. The furnishings were a mixture of Fizbee’s finest and what looked like antique store finds. Nothing really matched but it hung together anyway. Original paintings lined the ceiling, lit up by strings of holiday lights, and a blown glass chandelier that resembled the sun gave the room an orangey glow. The walls were blue, what he could see of them among the huge windows and many decorations. In the corner of the living room sat a piano that looked like it had been sawn in half and glued back together in an el shape. The kitchen had a bar at one end and occupied the center of the room. The Lizard twins were vying for space with Korrum, who zoomed around them. Something smelled really good.

“Hi!” Kiver grinned down at him. She wore a sexy silver halter dress and fake butterflies in her hair. 

Avery had never thought of himself as short but Kiver made him feel positively dainty. He was glad he’d aimed for fashion, wearing a funky black blazer he’d found over his kitty t-shirt and ripped jeans. Everyone else seemed to be dressed fancy.

“Hi! Does that piano actually play?”

“Sure. I mean, it’s not a concert grand but it makes noise.”

He laughed. “You look really pretty.”

She beamed at him. She took his hand and twirled him around.

“Kiver, need your help getting that fucking pan down,” Lucy said.

Kiver laughed and went to help.

“How’s the pink wine?” Fjordan asked. The hat had fallen off. He wore a lot of eye makeup and black lipstick and looked more than a little rakish.

“It’s good.” Avery smiled at him though something inside him felt like it was breaking. He pushed that aside and drained his glass. “But sadly empty.”

“We can solve that.” Fjordan got him another glass. Avery saw Korrum say something to him, and he nodded. He handed it to Avery but said, “Maybe make this one last, luv, unless you want to spend a lot of time with my loo.”

“You my mother now?” Avery asked, smiling. “Lighten up, Fee. It’s a party.”

“Is there something you’d like to talk about?’

“No,” Avery said, pouting. Fee was bringing him down. “I want to dance.”

“Fair enough.” Fee went and put on David Bowie.

Avery drained that glass too and started to dance. He threw his whole self into the dance and lost himself in the music. No thoughts, just pounding heady rhythms. The record ended and someone put another one on, the Clash, and other people were dancing now too. Avery spun in a circle and lost his balance, falling over a coffee table onto a sofa that was patterned like a cow. He tried to get up but his head was spinning.

He felt someone sit down next to him and stole a glance. It was Fee.

“Hey.”

“Kiss me,” Avery said.

“You’re drunk.”

“So are you.”

“Fair enough.” Fee kissed him. It was different from kissing Seth in ways Avery couldn’t readily define, but it was nice. Fee knew his way around a kiss. Avery pulled him closer.

“When’s the last time you had a decent blowjob?” he whispered in his ear and heard Fjordan’s breath catch. “I mean, trolls, all those teeth …” He bit Fee’s ear and felt the backs of several earrings against his tongue. “I could help you with that.”

“You’re dr--”

“I’m sober enough to proposition you, Fjordan.”

Fjordan pulled back to look at him for a moment and then stood up and offered him his hand. Avery wasn’t sure why he was doing this and right now he didn't care. Fjordan was hot and he wanted this.

Fjordan took him to the smaller of the home’s two bedrooms and shut the door behind them. “Are you sure--”

Avery kissed him, pressing him against the door, capturing the smaller man’s wrists in his hands. Fjordan closed his eyes and surrendered as Avery released him to kiss a line down his bare chest to his belt buckle and undo his pants, one hand moving to his own pants now.

“Oh my god,” Fjordan moaned as Avery’s mouth closed around him. He fell to his knees as he finished. “Holy shit.”

Avery smiled at him. A feeling of panic started to rise in him again, panic and loss. He shoved it aside. Fee pushed him back on the floor and returned the favor and Avery lost himself in that, convulsing on the floor as he came, shoving thoughts of Seth and sadness and wondering if he would ever love Avery as much as Avery loved him as far away as he could.

Fuck. He started to cry, hiding his face from Fee, but the other man wasn’t fooled. He touched his shoulder. Avery pushed him aside and got up, getting dressed again.

“I need a drink.”

“I don’t--”

“I need a drink, Fee,” he said savagely, and Fee nodded sadly, getting up too and pulling his clothes together.

Avery rejoined the party, not seeing who was there, the crush of bodies was thick now and he was able to grab a drink that was probably meant for someone else. It was harsh and clear and burned his throat but he didn’t care. He wanted to stop feeling anything.

It was suddenly too hot in the room. Everything was spinning. He stumbled through the crowd to the front door and heaved his guts out over the front porch railing, falling to his knees when he was done.

Someone handed him a glass of cool water and pressed a cold towel to the back of his neck. Someone with a hand he knew almost as well as his own.

“Drink that, you’ll feel better.”

“Fuck you.” Avery threw the water back at him. “Fuck you.” He started to cry.

“Let’s go home,” Seth said. “We should talk.”

“I’m sick of talking to you. You never say anything.”

Seth was quiet for a moment. “I have things to say I should have said a long time ago. I just think it’d be better if you were sober enough to remember it.”

“I fucking love you and you act like you feel nothing so what is there to say?” Avery said, sobbing.

“I love you too,” Seth said. 

Avery looked at him. Seth looked sadder than he’d ever seen him look. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t say it before.”

Avery couldn’t speak for crying. Seth sat with him, not touching him.

After a while Avery said, “I fucking hate you right now.”

“That’s understandable. Come home with me? Please?” Seth said.

Avery nodded, too weary to argue, and Seth helped him to his feet. He led him to a nondescript black car and opened the door. Avery got in.

“Where’d you get the car?” Avery asked as Seth pulled out of the yard, wiping his eyes.

“It’s Magnus’s. He said I could drive you home.”

“Oh, it’s Magnus’s,” Avery made a face.

Seth snorted. “Sometimes I swear you are five.”

“Isn’t he afraid I’ll barf in it?”

“Please don’t. I told him I’d clean it if you did.”

Avery was tempted but refrained. He was all barfed out anyway.

Seth drove them home.

“All of the cars in this town are so damned nice, did you notice?” Avery said. His thoughts were all over the place.

“Draygo’s hobby is fixing cars.”

Avery nodded, then held his head. “Oh, fuck.”

Seth laughed humorlessly. “Not a good sign that you’re getting a hangover before you even go to bed.”

“Not a good sign that you’re getting a hangover,” Avery mimicked.

“This is a really unattractive side of you.”

“Your butt is an unattractive side of you.”

Seth rolled his eyes. “OK, let’s just get you to bed.” He parked the car at their building.

Seth made him pee, take a shower, and brush his teeth and gave him two painkillers and a big glass of water before putting him, naked, to bed. The bed was spinning but Avery eventually fell asleep.

When he woke up the next morning Seth was sitting on the couch drinking coffee. “Coffee?”

Avery nodded. His head hurt. “Gotta pee first.”

When he emerged Seth was sitting out on the balcony. Avery found his pajama pants and pulled them on before joining him. They sat and drank their coffee in silence for a while, watching the river. Seth had thoughtfully left more painkillers next to Avery’s coffee.

“Do you remember that moment in that motel in that town in Nevada, when I asked you not to ask me why I acted the way I did?” Seth asked.

“Uh, vaguely.” The truth was he hadn’t forgotten it at all but he wasn’t about to admit that. He was angry at Seth about a lot of things and wasn’t about to play the part of cute little puppy again. Not today. Maybe not ever.

“I realized I was falling for you and that freaked me out,” Seth said. “Everyone I ever cared about left me. My mom, Malcolm. OK, it’s a short list but a painful one.”

Avery glanced at him.

“It scared me that I liked you that much, so quickly.” Seth’s jaw was set and he wasn’t looking at him. “I considered ditching you but I had made myself a promise that I wouldn’t let fear rule my life.”

Avery said nothing, just sipped his coffee, feeling a little petty now but telling himself he had a right to be.

“There have been so many times when I just should have said it, but I always found an excuse not to, and I’m sorry,” Seth said, looking at his hands. “I know you wanted to hear it. You deserved to hear it and I just .. couldn’t bring myself to say it.”

Avery said nothing.

“Fjordan … the night at the Double Take, he said I saved you. That I was the reason you could still be open and care about people and not be scared … but … “

“He’s right,” Avery said quietly, realizing it in that moment all over again, how much he owed Seth, and he couldn’t bring himself to maintain his anger. He thought of all the times Seth had taken care of him, showed him kindness, treated him with care, and love, and he realized that he’d known all along. That moment on the front porch. He’d known, and yet he couldn’t believe it until he heard him say it. He felt selfish and small.

“But the thing is, you saved me too,” Seth said, looking at his coffee. He swallowed, and then looked up at Avery. “You’re the reason I can still care about the world, the reason I’m still anything resembling a nice person. You gave me hope that the world wasn't just made of shit.”

“You don’t have to convince me,” Avery said. “I know you love me. I just,” he sniffed. “You cheated on me and it all fell apart. I know you told me love and sex aren’t the same thing but I thought, oh well, that’s just talk and I’m different and then you said I wasn’t your everything but the thing is, you’re mine.” He hated that he was crying now. “And I know I need to love you for who you are, and that includes the fact that you’re going to fuck other people and love other people, maybe as much as you l-love me, and that’s just … so hard.” 

“Avery--”

“Let me finish.”

Seth fell silent.

“You said everyone you love has left you, and I get that but everyone I love has betrayed me.”

Seth looked at him.

“My parents. Short list.” Avery laughed mirthlessly. “And that’s what your sleeping with Magnus felt like. Another betrayal.”

Seth nodded slowly. They sat there in silence for a while. Words felt dangerous, like weapons best carefully deployed. “So, where does this leave us?” he asked finally.

Avery looked at him, realizing in that moment that the only thing that mattered to him was that Seth remain a part of his life. “I can be brave if you can.”

Seth cocked his head at him.

“I can trust that you love me and no one else is going to come between us. I can be brave and let you be you if you can be brave and finally fucking admit you love me. After four fucking years. Do you know how many times I wanted to say it to you but I was scared? So scared you’d slam that door in my face.”

“God, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s OK. I should have been the one to say it first. I knew you loved me. You took such fucking good care of me. You didn’t laugh at my inexperience. You taught me to survive. You protected me. You were willing to go and look for me with a busted body. I was just so scared that three little words were going to make that all stop.” Avery started crying again.

“Come here.”

Avery climbed onto Seth’s lap and he held him as he cried.

“I can’t give up who I am,” Seth said after a long time. “Not even for you. I’m sorry.”

Avery nodded. “I don’t want you to. I love you, not the idea of you. You don’t need to change.”

Seth squeezed him tighter. “Thank you.”

Avery grabbed a tissue from a box on the side table and blew his nose.

“I think I might be developing strong feelings for Magnus,” Seth said after another pause.

“I can tell. It’s OK. I’ll get used to it.” He thought about the night before suddenly and cringed. “I think I owe Fjordan an apology. I kind of used him.”

“I think he’ll probably forgive you.”

“I hope so. I really like him. Which reminds me, you should call Conrad.”

“Conrad?”

“Yeah. Let him know you’re OK. Find out how he is. I know you two fucked.”

Seth laughed. “Can’t put anything past you.”

“I know you liked him a lot and at the time I was glad we weren’t staying. I’m sorry. That was selfish.”

“It’s OK. It’s not like you were the only one who wanted to leave Ohio. But you’re right, I should call him. Assuming I can get hold of him.”

“Good. Tell him hi.”

“I will.”

“I love you, Seth.”

“I love you, too.” Seth kissed his forehead and held him close.


End file.
